


Hieros Gamos

by Angelic_Hellraiser



Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe, Blood and Gore, Dark Kylo Ren, EPILOGUE TO BE POSTED, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Lovecraftian, Minor Character Death, Monster Kylo Ren, Possessive Kylo Ren, Psychological Horror, Rough Sex, alien queen rey, au with alien (movies) and ergo proxy elements, hints of sexually savage rey, hux bringing on the asshole vibes like a boss, i'm so sorry but i'm a cruel writer, my poor rey, naughty dream monsters, rey apparently has a tail kink, rey's and kaydel's friendship is everything, snoke is a sadistic piece of shit, snoke is utterly cruel and should die a thousand deaths, soft monster kylo, the queen has awakened, the smut has finally arrived... mostly
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-05
Updated: 2019-04-09
Packaged: 2019-06-22 17:16:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 39,579
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15586791
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Angelic_Hellraiser/pseuds/Angelic_Hellraiser
Summary: Heat blooms across her cheek, the warmth of a hand. 'Come to me. Free me. I’ll make them pay for what they did to you. I swear it, Rey. I’ll make them scream and beg and lay them out to rot in the desert sands.'She isn’t sure why, but the words stir an anguish so deep in her chest she howls, her face crumbling into her hands and her knees almost buckling again, but he doesn’t let her fall.'Come to me... '





	1. Part I: Child of Waiting

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **A/N:** Here's to [Leofgyth](https://leofgyth.tumblr.com/), or this story honestly wouldn't have come to fruition. The title of Part I is blatantly inspired by the very talented artist, WinterofherDiscontent, and her beautifully atmospheric piece, [The Waiting Child](http://winterofherdiscontent.tumblr.com/post/177151852794/the-waiting-child-second-in-a-new-series-im). Lastly, this project _should_ consist of only three parts... unless my muse decides to go off on a tangent. 
> 
> **MAIN INSPIRATIONS:** Ergo Proxy (anime), Alien (movie franchise), H. P. Lovecraft and various other unlisted elements. 
> 
> **CHAPTER WARNINGS:** offensive language, mentions of abuse, semi-nsfw smut (more of a tease), horror descriptions that might be triggering for some, lastly I have no idea about computer source code so forgive my crude attempt, etc.
> 
> **REMINDER: THIS FIC IS DARK AND I MIGHT HAVE MISSED SOME TRIGGERS ON MY LIST, SO TREAD CAREFULLY!**
> 
>  **OTHER PLACES TO FIND ME:  
> **  
>  **Reylo Tumblr:** [ReyloisBlessed](https://reyloisblessed.tumblr.com/)  
>  **Personal Tumblr:** [angelic-hellraiser](https://angelic-hellraiser.tumblr.com/)  
>  **Twitter:** [A_Hellraiser](https://twitter.com/A_Hellraiser)  
>  **deviantART:** [AngelicHellraiser](https://www.deviantart.com/angelichellraiser)  
>  **Instagram:** [angelichellraiser](https://www.instagram.com/angelichellraiser/)  
>  **FFN:** [Obsidian Lullaby](https://www.fanfiction.net/u/4761457/)  
>  **Wattpad:** [AngelicHellraiser](https://www.wattpad.com/user/AngelicHellraiser)
> 
>  *** * Moodboard created by[Beautiful_and_Broken (Dazzy)](https://twitter.com/DazzledbyJake)** 💜

**♚ ✶ PART I MUSIC ✶ ♕**

 

* * *

 .

 _“I will never disappear._  
_For forever, I'll be here.”_

\- Keep the Streets Empty // Fever Ray

.

* * *

 

A pulse echoed in the dark. A single pulse which, after this long winter of emptiness, compelled the universe to reverent silence.

He sensed it, feathering out along the dead world around him like the rejuvenating birth of a wondrous dawn as it spilled through the fissured walls of his stygian realm with vibrant color. _Her color._ His soul hitched, pangs of joyous agony vibrating out of his being in calamitous waves and he reached, clawing out before him with shocked desperation and renewed hunger.

In the eyeless twilight of his domain, her color lapped up to meet his war-worn soul with warmth and an ardent tenderness that he knew could only be hers.

_She’d come back._

After two centuries, his beloved had returned…

 

x

. x .

x

 

 

 

 

 

* * *

 

.

_"What would an ocean be without a monster lurking in the dark? It would be like sleep without dreams."_

- Werner Herzog

.

* * *

 

Muddy light. There is no other way to describe it—a choking, nebulous haze of ash and silt from the ceaseless dust storms, and a faint glow of _something_ just beyond. They call it the sun—they, meaning the ones who’ve actually _seen_ it.

She has never had the luxury to witness such a miracle.

Before the cataclysmic fall of the human species the sun had been a fundamental element of this world; a _life giver_ , the archives commonly call it. The archives also speak of vegetation and flowers. Such things are said to have drank in the rays of sunlight and bathed in cool, alkaline rain. It’s hard for her to imagine a rain that does not strip away the minerals of the soil, let alone the delicate stems of greenery like the lush sprouts of spinach she had once witnessed in a greenhouse located in the Varykino Sector.

Unfortunately, journeying beyond the quarantine line and out of her assigned sector had earned her ten lashings—twenty after she’d stabbed her caretaker in the calf with a hidden shiv, but what is she if not a rule breaker. After all, who said a lowly moonrunner couldn’t sneak into one of the inner city sectors and hack the citizen files of the Intelligence Bureau. Only once, obviously, because being caught that far in-city would mean her death.

Moonrunners remain along the outer rim of the dome in the Jakku Sector where they are _never_ to cross the Aegrus Border. Few other moonrunners during her years have violated that law... and they were executed on sight. She’d previously believed the only reason she hadn’t faced execution for her border violation was some blind, outrageous drawing of luck. But she isn’t so sure anymore.

Readjusting her goggles and the breathing apparatus protecting her lungs, she glances out across the barren hardpan. Stretching as far as the human eye can see lies the flat alkali basin of what was once a massive inland sea and beyond that, lost to the thick wall of dust storms, a jagged mouth of mountain ranges which encompass the basin.

There was once a monorail which had traversed the landscape between all the known domes, delivering supplies and keeping contact between the city regents. But that time has long since passed. More than two centuries ago now. In a time before the Great War had torn human civilization apart, before the rise of the First Order, before... _Supreme Leader Osric Snoke_.

Her eyes drift to the skeletal wreckage of a seafaring vessel some thirty meters south, a once massive cruise liner with most of its outer haul eroded away by time and abrasive winds. She found it near a decade ago and had taken refuge when one of the deadliest storms ever recorded hit the basin. Unfortunately, a friend of hers hadn’t been quick enough to find protection. She’d found his bones some weeks later, eaten down to the marrow.

The squall had lasted three full days with her curled up in the fetal position crammed under a small nook at the very base of the ship where the iron underbelly could still protect her. She recalls the ache of her muscles, the strain on her spine and the _thirst_. Her canteen had been lost in the scramble down.   

Three days without water in the desert can kill. She was lucky to have crawled the four kilometers back to the outpost.

Her caretaker hadn’t been too enthusiastic about her little venture, drunk as he was on whiskey after receiving the business end of a riot baton for losing ten of his moonrunners. The Regent had punished him for his cavalier handling of his workers, warning that should he prove wasteful a second time he would be efficiently dealt with—meaning _disappeared_.

That’s how things are run in the dome. Efficiently. The needed number of abled-bodied citizens fulfill their purpose and no more, each faction achieving their quota with streamline adequacy, no extra bodies spared and failure perceived as a sin.

 _“I am a fellow citizen. A fellow citizen acts in accordance with the law of the dome and the law is harmony. To disrupt harmony is to forfeit one’s raison d’etre among the citizenship. I am a fellow citizen.”_   

The old dictum from her childhood echoes endlessly in her mind, a reassuring anchor— _a terrifying lie_. She squashes the rogue thought like a bug and files it deeply away in her subconscious. Like the ever resilient roach such thoughts can find their way back, immortal, dangerous thoughts that pollute the mind with other infectious possibilities.

 _And roaches are hardy creatures._ She can respect that.  

Looking now at the ship that had saved her life so many years ago, she finds her mind traveling back to what she’d found the night she hacked into the main archives. An ambiguous file with an even more ambiguous name…

_KOR-GENESIS._

The discovery had been an accident—which is how all magnificent finds happen, apparently—but the contents of the unmarked file, stowed away in the fathomless depths of the Intelligence Bureau’s databank, was indexed under one Armitage Hux.

 _Regent Hux_ as he is better known.

The file wouldn’t have caught her attention at all if not for the naked source code listed alongside the file details. All her life, nothing within the dome was ever out of place, everything was perfect, _painstakingly so_.

And yet within that source code she distinguished a name.

 

> . . . struct crypto_attr_u32 data;}nu32;}attrs[CRYPTO_MAX_ATTRS];[<uuid>  | <file> | <secret hex>]<name:skywalker . . .
> 
>  

It stuck out almost as if deliberate eyesore to capture someone’s attention.  

_Someone._

 

x

. x .

x

 

She sleeps fitfully, dreaming nightmares of hellish shadows and a voice, a howling voice begging for respite from some unknown assailant. The predawn hours find her bolting awake in a sheen of sweat, eyes tear-swollen and tongue bloodied. It has been years since she has suffered these types of dreams.

Dressing quickly, she forces the images from her mind and heads out for work, ready to fulfill her raison d’etre—

— _like_ _a good and obedient fellow citizen._

 

x

. x .

x

 

Days pass by. More nightmares...

… and the shadows grow faces.

 

x

. x .

x

 

The dream words begin to take form—

_Don’t be afraid..._

_Monster!_

_… become who you were meant to be._

_… stand with me, Rey._

 

x

. x .

x

 

For most fellow citizens, AutoReivs are a way of life, a common backdrop in the everyday routine. The elites have their entourages, the middle class have their companion models and the moonrunners have the guardians which keep them from crossing into the inner dome. There had once been a class of space exploration AutoReivs which made the journeys off planet that were too dangerous for humans, but no AutoReiv or human has traveled outside the Earth’s atmosphere since the annihilation of the Republic some two and a half centuries ago.

No one can pinpoint the exact date, because most of the Republic’s archives were wiped out during the first war. To be frank, no one can determine anything for sure, really. Aside from the Regent.

_“The Republic was weak. Weakness breeds chaos and chaos breeds destruction. A fellow citizen is the rebirth of humankind from this failed system. Order is harmony. Harmony is law.”_

She kicks the trained maxim from her mind as one would expel a cantankerous family member from their home and walks on to the public shower facility, grit and dust aggravating her tired eyes. When she was a small girl, she’d avoided showering completely, fearful of most if not all the adults that surrounded her. Now that she is older—and used to combative situations thanks to squabbles outside the dome—she brandishes much more confidence than she should.

 _Arrogance can be costly,_ a wise one would say, but she is young, capable and yet to pay any real price for her folly.

Besides, she has her staff.

 

x

. x .

x

 

“It’s a load of bullshit!” Kaydel Connix grouses from the rim of her drink, cinnamon eyes glittering.

Rey remains quiet, swallowing down her alcohol with a grimace. Alcohol is forbidden to most citizens, especially those along the outer sectors; not to mention illegal for ones underage, but the Jakku Sector without its hootch is like a dome city without its dome—inconceivable.  

“How the hell would you know, Connix?” the man sitting at their round table slurs, a conspicuous line of spittal glistening down his chin.  

“Skywalker is a myth! All those old stories are myths!” Kaydel fires at him, slamming her cup on the table.

Droplets slosh onto Rey’s hand and she stares at them absently, the more connected part of her brain journeying to a place she’d prefer to completely avoid.

“Luke Skywalker was real!” the man argues as he takes an open-mouthed sip of his drink. It douses his chest, but he doesn’t seem to care. “How can you not believe the story?”

_KOR-GENESIS._

“It’s an old legend the dissenters have turned into a rallying cry they use to whisper behind the First Order’s back. It’s just a story.”

_KOR-GENESIS._

“But the Knights of Ren—”

“I’m done talking about child fairy tales with you, Dameron.” Kaydel rises from her shabby stool and turns to Rey who currently has her gaze fixed on the rotting wood of the table. “Come on. Plutt’s shipment of chocolate has just come in. Let’s go filch a crate of it.”

Rey throws back the rest of her drink. “Last time we got caught.” she deadpans.

“And I took most of the blame.” Kaydel counters, hauling her up to her feet, “come on!” Both girls almost lose their balance as they exit the bar, Kaydel dragging a dazed Rey close behind.

Outside the false night sky reveals heavy rain clouds and a simulated drizzle taints the air, dampening Rey’s shoulders. The ramshackle exterior of the bar radiates golden warmth that she wishes desperately to wrap herself back up in, but Kaydel has crossed the main street, cutting through the trickling stream of faceless moonrunners filthy in their attire and worked to the bone. Rey looks down at the hand wrapped securely around her wrist and considers jerking away, but she’s far too tipsy. Besides, as much as Kaydel’s weakness for chocolate has cost them, Rey finds her mouth watering.

How many months has it been since she’s tasted something _sweet_?

Five? Six? Nine?

“You don’t believe Poe’s drivel about those old stories, do you?” Kaydel asks over her shoulder as they cut through a back alleyway. “Even if they were true, they happened over two centuries ago.”

Rey hiccups and lets her eyes drift skyward. “I’m not sure.”

_A lie?_

The two take a turn down an conspicuously darker passage to a descending set of stone steps—one of the maintenance entrances to the underground sewer network. Rules dictate that citizens are not to use the network for fear of a biohazard outbreak, but everyone knows that’s not the only reason.    

Over the years, rumors have popped up here or there of dissenters departing to the underground, forfeiting their citizen raison d’etre to find _the Truth_ . A radical idea. In the last few months, new rumors have surfaced of these _vulgar degenerates_ , which the Regent has dubbed them, forming a clandestine coalition. A resistance group.

That’s why Rey had risked hacking the databanks. She had to know if it was true… But when the time came, she couldn’t even open _that_ file, could she?

_Coward._

 

x

. x .

x

 

The dreams again, but different this time. Deeper somehow.

_And utterly terrifying._

Her lungs scream for air as she claws futilely at the surrounding liquid darkness and her hands slam into something solid, convex, like the rounded surface of plate glass. An image of the dome enters her mind, bulbous and glowing with light outside in the swirling emptiness of the bedimmed world. But there is no light here and it’s small, so very small.

She hammers at the glass, an alien rage so profound overriding her fear and burning at her veins that she chokes back a gasp. All at once, she feels invaded.

_Who are you?!_

The unknown voice ripples down her spine, a jagged bundle of thrones unfurling, coiling around her and chilling her to the bone. But this is her dream, her own mind. Surely it can conjure up a stranger’s voice. Nevertheless, the feeling of being shoved into someone else’s space remains.

 _Who are you?_ The voice drops an octave and invisible hands seize her mind like a vice.

She whimpers, shocked. _This is only a dream!_  

_I won’t ask you again._

The finality of the statement makes her stomach fall through her feet, disappearing into whatever black horror lies below her and she answers apprehensively. _Rey_.

The following silence warns her to continue.

 _I’m just a girl, a moonrunner from the Jakku Sector._  

 _Moonrunner?_ The voice sounds thoroughly confused.

Suddenly, the encompassing darkness is rent in two by a blinding light and Rey howls in panicked agony as it pours down from the heavens, melting over her— _them_ —like the explosive birth of a star. For a moment she thinks she can hear this unknown Other scream, too, and even attempt to crawl into her, but she cannot allow herself to be ousted from her own body. She shoves viciously at him, though the presence holds fast, wrapping long ichorous tentacles around her awareness in a death embrace. She writhes and groans, fear pumping in her veins like winter fire, fueling her heartbeat into a static storm of thunder, and she pushes _harder_.

_No! Don’t leave me here!_

_None of this is real!_ She screams. _A dream—it’s only a dream! You aren’t real!_

_Rey!_

The Other’s voice abruptly multiplies around her into a chorus of fury and she _feels_ the moors of her mind splinter as she breaks away, as he tears pieces of her with him and leaves fresh gaping wounds along her consciousness. She shrieks in pain...

… and wakes in tears.

 

x

. x .

x

 

The last bar of chocolate is shared between herself and Kaydel as they hunker down in a small cave to wait out a rare midnight storm. Rey nibbles dispassionately with her staff laid across her lap, her eyes tired and bloodshot.

Plutt hasn’t noticed the missing crate much to their relief, but if Rey is honest, she has yet to find herself comforted by the fact. Something builds beneath the everyday toil of the citizenry. _She can sense it._ The Regent has made four public service announcements just this week, a peculiar deviation from the mundane.

_And the dreams..._

“I met the Resistance.” Kaydel speaks over the silence, her gaze penetrating.

Rey pauses, the lump of sweetness melting over her tongue, then swallows awkwardly.

Kaydel continues to stare at her, modest bow lips pressed into a fine line.

Neither woman interrupts the silence again.

 

x

. x .

x

 

The face of Poe Dameron appears on the most recent broadcast.

Rey stands away from the other moonrunners and fellow peons as she looks up at the titanic display screen, the surrounding skyscrapers of the other sectors indistinguishable pillars of dusk against the synthetic sunset. There are thirty-two other massive monitors illustrating the same image with the same recording of the Regent’s message. This message is broadcast from the very center of the dome in the Regent’s Tower, or better known by the _lesser_ fellow citizens as the Black Needle.

“... These dissenters are violators of the law! They endanger you and your families, your very way of life! _We_ must work together to weed them out and extract them from our citizenry. _We_ must protect our way of life! Remain vigilant, fellow citizens…”

Rey cannot listen anymore. She turns away forcefully, her eyes slipping down to the dark alleyways between the shanty buildings of Jakku Sector to the manhole covers and the maintenance entrances. _To the underground._  

She hasn’t seen Kaydel for three days now.   

 

x

. x .

x

 

_KOR-GENESIS._

“The pieces you’ve brought me tonight are worth one-quarter portion.” Plutt grumbles from his high perch.

Rey glares at him incredulously. “Last week they were worth a half portion each.”

“Where is your friend?” he asks offhandedly, passing over her statement.

Her anger at his blatant disregard for integrity clouds her response. “What friend?”

“Connix.”

Rey’s hackles raise and a cold chill suddenly ripples down her spin. The eyes of the First Order Regent are everywhere. She swallows thickly. “I don’t know.”

It does not hurt to tell this little truth. At least, she thinks it doesn’t.

Plutt’s insectile gaze turns to chipped glass. “Not a clue, Rey? You’re sure?”

She swallows again. “Not a clue.”

Plutt stares after her as she grabs her portions and hurries away, a hot sickness rolling through her stomach and fear suffusing her cheeks a rosy crimson. What will she do? What can she do? The world is turning upside down.

_KOR-GENESIS._

 

x

. x .

x

 

_Rey?_

_Rey._

She jolts from her dream state.

The circumambient world is a milky haze of dirty orange _—_ desert daylight. She thinks for a moment that she has succumbed to dehydration and fallen out on the sands, but the frigid cold around her negates that assumption. She reaches up to adjust her breathing mask, notes the liquid way her limbs move, and frowns.

_Rey._

She blinks, her vision nothing more than an unfocused blur. The mask feels larger than it should— _different_ —and the air around her body feels too heavy, too… _dense_.

_Rey._

And her body isn’t supine as she would expect, but instead upright— _floating_ , in fact. A slow seed of panic germinates in her belly, splintering open, roots reaching, tangling, and all at once she knows she isn’t in her own body.

 _A dream,_ she tries to calmly persuade herself. _Just a dream like last time._

_No. Not a dream, I’m afraid. Not this time._

Rey runs a stranger’s hands over a stranger’s face. Her fingertips distinguish prominent cheekbones, a long nose and a peculiar, textured crease down one side of the cheek. The shoulders are broad—monstrously so—and there appears to be thick medical tubes connected to all major arteries.

 _You_ , she murmurs.

The viscous liquid surrounding the Other’s body is dense and cloudy, likely nutrient rich, and with a minor pull of the breather, she notes the intrusive throb of an endotracheal tube inside the throat.

 _Who are you?_ She wonders absently.

 _I think you already know who I am._ The voice purrs.   

Rey gathers her wits. _If this isn’t a dream, then what is it?_

_I’m not sure._

_Liar._

_You think so?_ It grins.

She can hear the slow parting of the lips, the languid curving of a sardonic mouth expressed in the words. The tone is dark and playful, much to her discontent. And the truth is... she doesn’t think so, not at all.

 _Where am I?_ She says after a long silence.

You _are in your bed, but your mind is with me._ It answers. _I suspect_ I _am somewhere underground._

 _Well, how do I get back to_ me _, then?_ She huffs.

 _Am I assumed to know everything?_ It bristles.

She deflates. So this Other is just as bewildered as she is. _What are you, then?_

Silence.

The Other’s lack of an answer makes her extremely uneasy and she reaches out with the stranger’s hands, needing something to distract her away from that oppressive stillness. She finds the familiar glass wall, convex and cylindrical like a tube.

 _I… I don’t remember,_ it finally replies.

 _You said I know who you are._ Rey tries. _What do you mean by that?_

_You know more about me than I do myself._

_What does that even mean?_ She grounds out.

 _Memories_ , comes the simple return.

_What of your memories?_

_No, not mine. Yours._

Her heart hastens in her chest. _Mine?_

_Can’t you feel it?_

_Feel what?_

The darkness swathes around her, liquescent tentacles anchoring possessively at every corner of her mind, but this time she recognizes it for what it is. _Him._ Images pervade her awareness. Blood-soaked images of chaos and battle, gaping faces and dead eyes—war. She is struck by the sudden and overwhelming sense of loss. It pierces through her ribs like a javelin and she screams; aimless screams of words that aren’t really words and a desolation so utterly complete she feels her true body respond, muscles seizes as it bucks forward.

_But he won’t let her go._

She weeps as _his_ body curls in on itself, as her consciousness forces his hands to claw at his face. _What have you done?!_ She wails.

_Remember, Rey._

 

x

. x .

x

 

Echoes of his dulcet tone linger with her, whispering when she walks the desert sands, when she lies alone in her hammock, thoughts of Kaydel and Poe, the Regent and the First Order plaguing her mind. Corruption. Byzantine plots.

_KOR-GENESIS._

Kicking over the side of her bed, she bounces to her feet, too restless to sleep. A walk sounds nice right about now. A walk to the inner city maybe, to sneak into one of the greenhouses again, perhaps look upon the Black Needle? She frowns. The First Order troops are out in force and it’s still daylight. Not to mention inundation of sentinel AutoReivs in the outer sectors. No telling what it’s like in-dome.

She’s more apt to get caught—and maybe she should be.

_Remember, Rey._

Few fellow citizens experience insanity. Those that do are taken in for reconditioning and sometimes they don’t come back. _But those are only ghost stories_ , Rey tells herself. Just things she’s heard whispered by others around the bar table, or the outpost campfires outside the dome.

Like the stories of Luke Skywalker?

_“I met the Resistance.”_

Kaydel’s face floats up from the depths, solemn and questioning, and Rey runs a trembling hand through her hair. There had been more to her gaze, more to the words, because they were not a statement at all, but a question.

_“You don’t believe Poe’s drivel about those old stories, do you?”_

_KOR-GENESIS._

_KOR._

_Knights of Ren._

She dresses hastily, needing a breath of fresh air… and an excuse to escape from her own thoughts. They run rampant in her skull, hammering away like wild miners eager to unearth some forbidden secret. Madness is unbecoming of a fellow citizen and she _is_ a fellow citizen.  

She is _not_ crazy.

 

x

. x .

x

 

Weeks pass.

Rey is able to, for a short time, suspend herself in a benumbed inertia, mingling her hours of work, consumption and sleep into a single innocuous stream of vapidity. She loses track of specific dates, her only benchmark being that of the Regent’s unpleasant spout of fresh names added to the roster of _vulgar degenerates_.

The dreams have also fallen silent, much to her… relief?

_No, that’s not quite right._

She recalls the furtive conversations of the bar earlier this morning when she’d arrived from outside the dome, filthy and exhausted after a night’s work. Plutt had also felt it prudent to question her about Kaydel again, this time posing more difficult questions.

Needless to say, Rey played the fool.

But it was the conversations among the dimly lit tavern that truly made her heart seize with fear. The subject of discussion was none other than the hated hero, Luke Skywalker, and Snoke’s beloved Master of the Knights of Ren. These fables diverge on countless details, but there is one universally held commonality: Kylo Ren was a _monster_ , not a fallen champion as the First Order Archives would have the fellow citizens believe.

“Kylo Ren.” Something inside her curls pleasantly as she murmurs the name aloud and she forces it away, quickening her pace in the growing light overhead.

Her footsteps abruptly stutter to a halt. Standing just outside her cabin is a First Order patrol, three _men_ dressed in immaculate alabaster armor with imposing assault rifles strapped across their sleek cuirasses. They glint like fine opal stone in the pendulous glow-lamps above them.

Rey slinks to the darker side of the alleyway, studying them. They carry heavy hardware—far too heavy for simple patrolling. Their pulse rifles are outfitted with an over-under configuration that includes a PN 30 mm pump-action grenade launcher. Not a standard weapon for a patrol unit.

Her fear spikes. _What could human First Order possibly be doing here? Wouldn’t the Regent simply send out AutoReivs? Why risk possible contamination with the inner residents?_

Then, one of them glances in her direction, his mask a humorless grinning caricature of a human face, and her heart scrambles painfully up her throat, clawing and grappling like a wild animal. For the longest moment of her life she conjures up reasons for them to turn their weapons on her. She convinces herself—more now than ever—that she is _not_ a fellow citizen, that they would be chasing down a…

The trooper beside him nudges his arm and he looks away. Rey breathes a sigh of relief as the group exchanges nods between one another and departs, winding up to the main square where the Aegris Border will sanitize them prior to reentry.

She delays a moment longer before scurrying into the safety of her home, slamming the door shut on her heels and freeing the breathless curse trapped behind her teeth. She leans back into the door, sliding down to the ground and folding her knees to her chest.

Minutes tick by.

Slowly, her eyes roam over the contents of her dwelling, scrutinizing every detail. Finding nothing out of place, she rises to her feet and makes for her bathroom to shower, but something gives her pause.

 _A scrap of paper?_ Such materials are rarities even among the elite.  

 _‘Resist.’_ the note reads.

It sits atop her nightstand, its modest calligraphy unmistakable. _Kaydel._ Rey stares at it with wide unseeing eyes as the air leaves her lungs in a strangled gasp. Beside the note is a chocolate bar, half of it broken off— _eaten_. She walks over slowly, taking the bar and placing it carefully beneath the pillow of her hammock.

She _burns_ the note.

 

x

. x .

x

 

The apotheosis of loneliness manifests ultimately in the shadow of the self, unfurling like a poisoned flower who seeks to pollute the entire spirit with its grim fragrance. It takes years of festering, years of disappointment to putrefy the soil of the heart enough to ensure the growth and christening of such a flower.

Rey knows this for her flower is sacrosanct...

She tosses and turns in her hammock, her unexpected journey to the dream realm a tumultuous one filled with terrifying silhouettes of cyclopean horrors and a gargantuan, eroded vessel—a cruise liner. _Her cruise liner_ . It bucks and sways on a sea of unknown faces who peer up at her from the crashing waves, their woebegone expressions stark white as they melt back into the gloom and darkness. Some faces hold _accusation_.

She turns away and finds herself on the cusp of a precipice, the roiling water rushing over the side and disappearing into a murky chasm of emptiness. The only sound in this place is the steady thunder of a stranger’s heartbeat.

Faces sweep along with the water, tumbling over the side as Rey watches them vanish into the black and a familiar ache throbs in her chest. _These are not the faces of strangers._ She murmurs. _I know them… and they know me._

The drop off draws closer, her ship groaning in protest to the vicious churning of the waves. And yet the instinctual fear she should feel at such an impending doom is markedly absent. She wonders at this as she walks out across the bridge, walls of water spilling over onto the deck in thick, foaming sheets, but there are no faces.

At the opposite side, she glances over the railing and finds that the faces have disappeared entirely. Another thought offhandedly occurs to her—well, more a question: would she have seen her own face in those inky depths?

 _Yes,_ a subterranean part of her murmurs.

Water pelts down in drowning buckets and the winds howl like a discordant symphony of voices as the massive ship leans, and begins to tip over the chasm. She grips hazily at the railing, the latent fear in her spurring to life while her dream mind seems to uncouple itself from her body, drifting and drifting away. Reaching for it in clawing frustration, Rey feels a bizarre emptiness overwhelm her as the cruise liner plummets into the depths, leaving _half of her_ behind.

A joyless moan departs her lips and the sound quickly spirals below as if siphoned down by an enormous drain, a world eater. It will swallow her, too, even if only half of her.

And then what?

The ship atomizes, melting into the rushing darkness and she takes one final breath, preparing herself for what she knows will come. It does seconds later, waves and waves of brackish water collapsing in around her, choking off her air supply and inundating her in an icy universe of pain… and _memory_.

A flash of red.

Screaming.

_“There’s been an awakening. Have you felt it?”_

Rey cringes away from the serpentine rumble. It pulses outward through the eyeless void like an impending doom, low, omnipotent and brimming with malicious hunger.

 _“Yes.”_  

Her heart skips a beat. _Kylo?_

_Rey…_

She stiffens as she feels a pair of phantom hands cradling her cheeks, warm against the arctic stillness, and her awareness all at once centers back on herself and the burgeoning ache in her lungs. _Should this pain seem so real in dreams?_

A distracting thumb trails over her mouth, parting her lips and delving in, sweeping over her teeth and coaxing her tongue almost playfully. She opens by some bizarre, ancient reflex and a shiver kindles down her spine, livening her blood as she tastes the slick leather of a glove. It roams her mouth, dancing around her tongue while the other hand drops to her neck, tightening, grasping. She closes her mouth around the digit in response and seizes it with her teeth in a punishing vice.

Something rises from the depths. Perhaps a moan; perhaps a growl.  

_You see? Pain can be beautiful._

Is that Kylo’s voice—his chuckle? It sounds too distorted, a disfigured echo layered into the fathomless expanse of this arcane, watery underworld like the lifeblood of Hosnian Dome, pumping below its very streets… right to the Black Needle.

She feels herself grin. _The_ black heart _where the monster lies._

This thought suddenly leads to a wandering, cavernous labyrinth and a vibrant ball of string, red string. _You_ , she murmurs.

Rey feels the hand gripping her chin tug, but she does not release its thumb, instead curling her tongue around the digit in an inquisitive caress as the low heat simmering through her veins compounds into a lecherous fire. The opposite hand at her neck squeezes— _a warning?_ —and travels lazily down her chest, ghosting between the valley of her breasts like a feather to settle below her navel. Fingertips hook under her threadbare nightgown, lifting it up and planting a sweltering palm against her sex.

She gasps—she can breathe now? The realization is hastily flung aside as an index and middle finger apply pressure to her clit, working a slow agonizing circle that makes her bite down harder on the thumb.

 _There you are._ Kylo half croons, half snarls.

Another circle—three, four times; then, counterclockwise.

Rey cries out, releasing his thumb as her mouth falls open in awe of the sensation. The hand drops away and she reaches for the owner of it, yet finds nothing, only the stygian cold. All too soon the welcoming pressure between her legs fades, too, leaving a strangled sob lodged in her throat as she fights against the abrupt impulse of desolation. The panic spreads like a cancer, corrupting her thoughts into a single, linear loop of two words:

_Come back... Come back. Come back!_

But she is alone.

_No!_

She lashes out in a bewildering shock of rage, trembling the very foundations of the nightmare with her fury, her desperation and anguish fanning out in chaotic waves. The silence that inevitably follows ransacks what little anger she has left and she clamps her eyes shut, succumbing to bitter, unwanted tears. Her sobs reverberate back to her as if in mocking reply to her sorrow and she cries harder.

 _Loneliness is the human condition._ Someone had once told her that, though she cannot remember who, just another nameless face of the Jakku sector like herself. Was it an old woman? An old man? Does it matter? She supposes not.

Those with whom she has built relationships over the lonely years have all either died or disappeared. What is left?

The soft chorus of an incoming tide reaches her ears and she opens her eyes, looking out to the faint line of a horizon. She stands on a remote islet in the middle of a vast black ocean, nothing more than a lonely drop of land in a galaxy of nothingness. And this place isn’t new to her. She sinks to her knees, letting her fingers dig into the coarse sand as she bows forward, pressing her forehead down to the ground with force.

She can smell the salt, the openness of the air, but nothing more. No life, no fragrance of change, or stink of inactivity. This forsaken place can’t even spare her a few tiny stars in the sky.

It is shapeless. _Endless._

 

x

. x .

x

 

Rey stares out at the smooth steel walls of the Aegris Border from her hidden position among the confined alleyways, dirt and debris dancing around her feet by the breeze. Her heart trembles in her chest as one of the sentinel AutoReivs sweeps by, it’s hefty body taller then the wall itself. It would look comical if it weren’t so frightening.

There was a time when the thought of breaking the rules felt liberating, when the mere idea of going against her raison d’etre sent a thrilling chill up her spine.

_And now?_

Nevertheless, she is going to pass the Aegris Border. Soon. Perhaps not yet, but soon. More and more her mind seems made up. The longer she stares at the places Kaydel and Poe used to haunt, the louder her thoughts become.

Is it so hard just to walk away?

It isn’t like she has parents who would miss her… not like she has a family. She is what the citizens call a _grim child_ , meaning a child with no known lineage.

And why should it matter?

Her parents abandoned her.

Staring down at her hands, Rey becomes acutely aware of a _missing_ part of herself. Her childish notions—that’s what is missing. She offhandedly wonders if they had died the first night she’d dreamed of him. It likely doesn’t matter.  One thing she does know for sure is that she has never been more afraid in her life.

_… and there is valid reason to fear._

“Fellow citizen!”

She nearly jumps out of her skin, whirling around to find one of the sentinel AutoReivs bearing down on her.

“What is your purpose here?” It demands, the glowing eyes of its skullish face glittering.

Rey swallows, answering with as much calm as she can muster. “I’m delivering a package from Unkar Plutt to storage building 1-9-3-0.” _Which isn’t entirely a lie._

The machine scrutinizes her coldly. “Return to your duties, citizen.”

She ducks her head, giving the sentinel a wide berth as she hurries away. Once in the clear she stops to take a moment to breathe, her heart raging in her chest. Out of the corner of her eye she spots movement. Turning, she finds a lone man standing near one of the maintenance entrances to the sewer network. His attire is nothing of consequence, his leather coat a tad eccentric for this sector, black pants worn and stained, and his rich dark skin almost entirely desaturated beneath the overhead light, but the terrified look of determination on his face is what gives Rey pause.

His blazing eyes capture hers and she is hit by the abrupt sensation of déjà vu. He opens his mouth as if to speak, though reconsiders, closing it and disappearing into the underground. Rey stands there, bewildered and suddenly disgruntled. She would cross the Aegris Border again and soon, fear or no fear.

 

x

. x .

x

 

 _I wouldn’t have thought_ you _would be afraid of breaking the rules._ His voice whispers, crawling up through her subconscious like a nighttime satellite.

She stiffens, the shock of his presence bringing her teeth down into the tip of her tongue. The taste of blood follows.

_Do you always scare so easily?_

Attempting to ignore him, she gathers her supplies and swallows down the last drops of water from her canteen before stoppering it and replacing her head wrap around her head. The desert winds are nonexistent tonight, leaving the flat hardpan a ghostly grey expanse under the roiling clouds above. Her breathing mask thumps softly against her chest as she slides down from a small cliff face to the salt bottom.

A fellow moonrunner thirty yards to the north waves at her as they turn for Niima Outpost, their quota of the night filled. Rey’s eyes follow after the soft glow of their headgear.

_Still avoiding me, Rey?_

She sighs heavily and saunters ahead in the direction of the dome.

 _It’s rude to ignore a guest_. he remarks coyly.

Her teeth come down on her tongue again, this time out of frustration. _You. Are._ Not. _My. Guest._

_This isn’t exactly something you or I can control, either._

She shakes her head, her frustration quickly building to anger. _Leave me alone._

_That’s such a peculiar request to make… for someone already so lonely._

She comes to an abrupt halt, her hands clenching into fists. “Get out of my head!” The words cut from her lips like a knife.

_You’ve waited your entire life. For what Rey? For who? Have you ever even asked yourself the question?_

She closes her eyes, tears threatening to fall as she feels her heart twist wretchedly in her chest. “I said to leave me alone.” Any semblance of command has abandoned her.

_No._

She pulls her shoulders in on herself, dropping her satchel of supplies and scavenged parts to sink to her knees. All around her the stygian darkness gathers, seeming to creep and wreathe like the coils of a colossal serpent, drawing closer, _closer_. Her hands press into the ground, focusing on the sensation of grit and salt beneath her fingers. She presses hard enough to hurt.

_Rey._

A sob escapes her.

 _Rey._ His tone soothes along her nerve-endings. _You’re running out of time._

Tears fall, free and hot down her grimmy face.

_Get up._

She shakes her head.

_You can’t—_

_Shut up. Shut up!_ “You did this!” she snarls as she smashes her palm against her forehead. “Now I can’t get rid of you!”  

Silence.

Thunder sounds in the distance; a building storm to the south. And the dome—the dome glows like a soft beacon in the gloom.

“Why can’t you just leave me alone?”

Suddenly, she senses him reach deeper into her body and her muscles obey, wrenching her to her feet at his behest. _You’re wasting precious time, my Rey._

Before she can be stunned by the mere fact that her body had been temporarily hijacked by some unseen force, the possessive pronoun spoken before her name secures her utmost attention. “What?” she sputters aloud.

Heat blooms across her cheek, the warmth of a hand. _Come to me. Free me. I’ll make them pay for what they did to you. I swear it, Rey. I’ll make them scream and beg and lay them out to rot in the desert sands._

She isn’t sure why, but the words stir an anguish so deep in her chest she howls, her face crumbling into her hands and her knees almost buckling again, but he doesn’t let her fall.

 _Come to me..._  

 

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**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **PLEASE REMEMBER TO LEAVE ME SOME FEEDBACK!  
> ** **CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM IS WELCOME!**  
>  **IF ANY ERRORS WERE SPOTTED, PLEASE LET ME KNOW!**  
>    
> 


	2. Part II: Aphotic Depths

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **A/N:** As always, apologies for the delay! I don't have anyone I can really talk to and hash this kinda stuff out with in conversation, so I've done a lot of rewrites and scrapping certain ideas that I felt didn't fit. Very time consuming, but I hope the length of this installment makes up for it (along with the naughtiness ;3)! I worked extra hard to make an engaging backstory for everyone. A _lot_ happens in this update! The title for this installment was directly influenced by the collaboration album Onyx showcased on the Cryo Chamber YT channel [[click here](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CbQBmfakQu8)].
> 
>  **MUSIC LIST:** Basically anything Gary Numan, especially _It Will End Here, I Am Dust_ and _My Name is Ruin_. Also [Memory - Council of Nine](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AzdmJbZQhdg) is a great atmospheric piece for this installment. 
> 
> **CHAPTER WARNINGS:** offensive language, minor character death, descriptions of blood and gore, uncomfortable power dynamics (i.e. Hux is a major dick and Plutt being a creep), horror descriptions that might be triggering for some and kinky gossamer dream shit with a side of explicit monster smut

**♚ ✶ PART II MUSIC ✶ ♕**

 

* * *

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_"The process of delving into the black abyss is to me the keenest form of fascination."_

\- H. P. Lovecraft

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* * *

 

 

“Did you hear? They took Jessika Pava.”

“Who took her?”

“Who do you think?!”

A pause. “Jessika? But… why her?”

“I saw her talking with Poe Dameron a few nights ago.”

“Poe Dameron?!”

“Big as life.”

“The Regent must really fear this resistance—

“Shh! You say that word again and I’ll report you myself!”

The two hissing voices continue on, unaware of the eavesdropper lurking behind the divider wall on the other side of the dingy bar. It’s mostly empty tonight, filled with nothing but haunted shadows and stale, vacuous air. Rey leans closer at the mention of Kaydel’s name, but the voices then dip too low for her to hear anymore.

Left to brood over her untouched alcohol in her cramped little alcove, she picks idly at the splintering wood of the round table, her thoughts wandering. _What had happened two centuries ago?_ The supreme leader had decreed specially chosen historians, his most trusted scribes, to educate the populace on the ashes of those dark times.

Rey nibbles angrily at her lip, brooding harder.

History tells its fellow citizens that Snoke lived long after the First Order’s initial inception, that his death ceremony was regarded as one of the most extravagant pieces of the dome’s history to be counted and, most importantly, that Snoke was a hero.

She remembers in her early years, when she was still a part of the inner dome, how the whole world glittered with the annual tribute to their supreme leader. Out here in the Jakku sector, the peons make due with what they can, but she will never forget—

—sitting atop the lap of an ancient and withered old man with arctic blue eyes, and a serpent’s tongue… whispering to her.

 _You will call him to me, precious child, and when he finally arrives, I will put him back where he belongs. I will put you_ **_both_ ** _back where you belong._

Rey’s blood instantly runs cold and her heart stops, the world around her dims and a bizarre yet familiar dread washes over her. She bounds up reflexively, sending her cup clattering to the floor and startling the other two patrons in the tavern. A clammy sweat breaks out across her arms, her neck, and her skin crawls with revulsion as she tries to shake the image from her mind…

But it only seems to burn deeper into her like a brand.

As it does a new emotion slithers up from the depths of her soul: _rage_ . Pure and black and terrifying. A monster of excitement that makes her want to dig her blunt nails into the withered man’s face, to tear away his flesh and see what delicate bones lay underneath. She could crush them, easily; she could turn them to powder, to dust. _Like the desert._

Stumbling to the exit, she hurries out into the predawn, running… _running_.

 

x

. x .

x

 

AutoReiv patrols have tripled in the last week. The Health and Welfare Bureau has also recently issued a call for all fellow citizens to undergo a mandatory mental health screening every month, and today is the day for Jakku Sector. Rey sits with her staff propped by her side, her fingers digging into the fabric of her leggings and her lower lip chewed raw. The AutoReiv set to monitor questions rolls out of Plutt’s office, the neon meridian lines contouring his miniature body glowing a soft pleasant orange.

“Rey!” Plutt calls impatiently.

_It’s her turn._

She rises on rubbery legs, her eyes never leaving the AutoReiv, and enters into his office, staff in hand. The room stinks—more than usual, anyway—and the white-blue globe hanging overhead flickers, dims, goes out completely; then, ignites to life again. Rey eyes it suspiciously as Plutt motions for her to have a seat on the stool opposite him. The AutoReiv moves forward and begins hooking her up to a machine on the table beside her. A body reader. The machine is used to detail her vital signs and, if necessary, catch her in a lie. That is if the AutoReiv doesn’t catch her first.

She does her best to relax her shoulders, to steady her breathing, but Plutt’s beady dark eyes make her want nothing more than to crack him over the skull with her staff and leap for the exit. The AutoReiv takes the staff, sitting it near the doorway. Her heart struggles in her chest, a caged violent thing.

_Will they find something wrong in my reading? What will they do with me if there is something wrong? Put me on pills again?_

Plutt begins the recording. “Mental screening for Rey of Jakku Sector, serial number 2514. Age 19. Date of screening November 1 according to Gregorian Calendars. Year 222 P.C.” He pauses, assessing Rey shrewdly. “Question one: What is your job description?”

“I’m a moonrunner.” she answers. “I retreive usable materials from the earth’s surface for the Hosnian Dome.”

“At what age did you become a moonrunner?”

“Eight.” Rey drones on robotically.

“And the reason for integrating you three years late into the program?”

“My parents abandoned me. I was not originally born in the Jakku Sector.”

“Your prior screenings show that you have repressed these memories. Do you recall them now?”

Rey swallows. “No.”

Plutt’s expression hardens. “Are you lying, fellow citizen?”

“No.” Her voice quivers… because this, if nothing else she says during the screening, is the _truth_.

“What is your favorite color?”

“Blue.”

“Why?”

“Because it calms me.” _And I fantasize of an earthly sky in the same, beautiful hue_ , she continues inwardly.

“Are you married?” he looks away from the list of questions momentarily to readjust his legs.

“No.”

“Have you ever killed anyone.”

Something in her flinches. “No.”

“What day is it?”

“The eve of the Annual Tribute.”

“Are you having suicidal thoughts?”

“No more than any of the other moonrunners.” A tinge of sarcasm leaks into her tone.

The vein at his forehead pulses, but he ignores it, continuing. “Are you having trouble sleeping?”

Her lashes flicker. “No.”

At once, the body reader beeps, an explosion of sound in the heavy room and Plutt’s cruel gaze darts from Rey to the machine; then, to the AutoReiv. Rey’s stomach plummets and she wills herself to remain calm.

Wheeling forward, the AutoReiv reads her vitals more closely, responding with a mechanically soft timbre. “Untrue.”

Plutt leans forward in his chair, menacing her with squared shoulders. “Answer candidly!” he spits.

Rey’s heart clenches in agony. To answer with the truth will only lead to more questions about the dreams, about where her state of mind takes her in those secret places. The truth will lead to _him_.

She inhales, averting her eyes to the floor. “Yes.”

“And your reason for deception?” he demands.

Heat spreads over her face, her neck, her arms and she bites anxiously at her lower lip when, out of the blue, an idea crashes into her, a brilliant idea. What if the truth can protect her little secret? _What if…_ “I’d prefer not to talk about them.” she grumbles, cheeks blossoming red.

“Why?”

“Because… they’re…” she wipes a stray lock of hair from her face, not needing to feign her discomfort. “They’re erotic.”

Silence again.

Rey glances up to Plutt and finds him eyeing her in a way that makes her skin writhe— _but it had worked_. He asks nothing further about her dreams and moves onto the next set of questions, the greedy glint of his eyes never dimming. Rey endures it; with a tight posture and aching fists, she endures it all until, at last, the hour runs down and she is on her feet in a flash, grabbing her staff and heading for her night out on the dunes.

While securing her breathing mask over her face outside, a soft timbre startles her from behind. “Be careful.”

Whipping around, Rey finds the little AutoReiv. “What?” she hisses.

Her eyes hastily seek out Plutt’s office and the open door revealing his grotesque figure hunched over a desk scratching notes on her test results. She looks back to the android.

“Be careful.” it repeats, turns and wheels back into Plutt’s office.

Rey watches it go, fear curling in her gut.

 

x

. x .

x

 

 _He_ is silent.

She washes the grit from her hair with rough hands, pulling mercilessly at the gnarled tangles. The few other moonrunners in the public shower pay her little mind and she hasn’t the focus to bother with her shyness this morning, anyway. It’s been over a month since his voice has haunted her and the silence is too deafening. Frankly, it terrifies her. His violent promises of vengeance had teased something in her memories and now she can’t put it back to sleep.

Rey finds herself missing him… and wondering, yet again, if she’s merely lost her sanity.

 

x

. x .

x

 

She tosses and turns, eventually finding herself dangling precariously from the hammock as the dreams assail her. _She’d carried it, close to her heart._ She remembers. _It was supposed to be destroyed, but… He couldn’t kill her. Despite everything he couldn’t—_

Rey snaps awake with a start, falling from her hammock and cracking her elbow on the floor. She groans as her mind floats back to reality and she closes her sleep-heavy eyes, pressing her forehead to the cool metal floor. She relishes the sensation, watching the blooming colors behind her eyelids while the dream ebbs, fading from her consciousness like night to the slow creep of dawn.

“Rey.”

Alarm curls down her spine instantly and her body goes rigid at the voice. Slowly opening her eyes, she peers up to find a small silhouette seated in the shadowed corner of her abode. The halo of golden hair is unmistakable.

“Kaydel?” she croaks.

Her friend rises slowly—almost _cautiously_ —and stands stiffly before her, arms placed carefully at her sides and the definite outline of a weapon at her hip. Despite the hazy obscurity of her face, Rey can feel the calculated hesitation burning from her eyes. “Are you enemy or friend, Rey?”

“What?” she blinks. “I—I don’t understa—”

“Answer me!” Kaydel cuts her off, the sharpness of her voice utterly alien.

Never before has she addressed Rey with such coldness, such distrust. Then, it smashes into her, caving her chest in like a ruthless sledgehammer, splintering bones, pulverizing organs. _I’m not like her._ Somehow, this assessment feels correct and her innate, if ambiguous, understanding of this brings a sick feeling to her stomach. It eats away at her insides like acid.

_Kaydel is questioning a stranger._

_No. Not_ just _a stranger._

“Are you starting to remember yet?”

The inquiry makes Rey flinch. “What am I supposed to remember?”

Kaydel opens her mouth, but closes it after a moment, that flicker of distrust passing over her face again. Rey can see more clearly now. She can see a fresh scar on her friend’s brow, though from what, she cannot say. And some of the plumpness is gone from her cheeks. Kaydel looks almost feral, though there is discipline in her expression, a cool awareness Rey has never seen before.

“I should blame you.” Kaydel admits after a long silence. “It was your fault. All of it.”

 

x

. x .

x

 

Simulated winter. It’s a bitch to put it mildly, but much more tolerable than the icy hellscape beyond the dome.

An announcement from the Regent alerted the citizens yesterday to the launch of first space mission in two centuries. With the limited resources, the research team will only be able to make a single round trip to investigate the earth’s weather patterns, documenting if there have been any changes since the last update to the records. Unmanned probes can only capture so much.

 _At least they get to see the sun_ , Rey muses wistfully. After that great cataclysm, she wonders what amazing and terrifying places have been forgotten by humans. _It’s a shame._

Surveying the dreary pulse of life in her sector, the bustle of the streets, the funereal frowns of passersby, she abruptly locks eyes with a familiar face—the man with the look of terrified determination. She stares, taken aback. Alongside him stands a young woman, short in stature, raven-haired with a deadly set of daggers above lush, rounded cheeks.

Rey wonders at them. _Where are you two going?_

The man dons the same leather jacket as before, more weathered now, torn in various places, while the woman wears a vivid, out-of-place uniform from the Varykino Sector. They appear frazzled and skittish, both sticking out like sore thumbs against the muted gray backdrop. _And they are running from something_ , she realizes.

A commotion near the sector gates suddenly draws her attention and she jerks around in time for a swell of people to hurl her backwards into a light post, sending her staff flying out of her hands. She emits a startled cry as her chin connects with iron and bodies flow past her in a panic. Attempting to maintain balance, she searches for the source of the uproar and finds it without much effort—a troop of tall, polished sentinel AutoReivs bounding through the crowd after something. No. _Someone._

A figure dressed in the same conspicuous Varykino raiment as the girl.

The teenager, probably no more than fourteen, rushes through the shrieking throng of people with the AutoReivs closing in and Rey watches in abject horror as he is shot dead, blood splattering the sidewalk and his body hitting the pavement with a resounding thud. It echoes into the stillness as if the final world-ending slam of a door. Her stomach lurches at the sound and she feels something twinge at the back of her shock-addled mind. Is it disgust? Excitement?

_Curiosity?_

She bites down hard on her tongue in the following silence. Everyone else remains frozen, a sea of aghast faces as the sentinels approach the body of the child, inspecting it with detached, mechanical precision. They are a circle of shiny white vultures above their carrion, dancing in their spiritless way as they pick at him, finding the evidence they require and leaving the rest of him to the worms.

Unexpected tears threaten her eyes and she swallows them back, unable to look away. A pool of crimson grows around him, adding a macabre dash of vibrancy to the otherwise monochrome landscape.

Save for two sore thumbs.

Rey expects to find them where she left them, but only an empty alley gawks back at her. She hastily scans the the surrounding pathways with no luck, but they can’t have gotten far. Numerous other AutoReivs are already sectioning off the area coupled with hover drones. Jakku Sector is being shut down.

Then, a flash of spring emerald. There, behind a set of crates at the rear of the tavern to her left. They huddle close to one another, their distraught gazes fixed on the narrow passage opposite them across the street. It’s blocked off by two hover drones.

_They’re trapped._

_But I need them alive, for now._

She frowns at the thought—no doubt hers—yet, the voice is different… colder, somehow. Simple. Predatory. A strategic deduction.

Shoving the unsettling realization aside, Rey follows her instincts, focusing purely on gut reaction. She needs to create a distraction, so she heads straight for the downed body, her hands curled at her sides and her heart raging in her chest.

“Halt citizen!” three sentinels bark in unison.

All machines shift their attention to her and the adrenaline in her veins blooms out like an icy chill over her nerve endings. She throws a furtive glance toward the crates and finds both the man and the woman watching her intently. Time moves slowly and Rey recognizes the same expression of distrust on the man’s face as the one shared with Kaydel that night in her home.

_‘Are you enemy or friend, Rey?’_

_I don’t know._

_Perhaps…_

Rey chances another step toward the corpse, willing all her focus on wrenching the tears back up from the pit of her stomach. It works. A sob escapes her throat, choked and ugly. Then another, and another.

Two AutoReivs approach threateningly. “Halt!” They boom.

This new Rey purrs in the darkness of her mind, lounging about without a concern in the world. _The real question is: are they_ **_my_ ** _enemy_ , she grins.

“Citizen 2514.”

Her eyes drift to the rear of the tavern again, but the couple is gone. The hover drones blocking their exit have circled closer to her position, giving the two a swift opportunity for escape and they must have taken it. Relief warms her veins, melting the icy grip strangling her spine and she relaxes, though only minimally.

This has drawn unfavorable attention to herself.

… and they left their comrade behind. No more a _child_.

 

x

. x .

x

 

Unfavorable attention had been an understatement. She should have heeded Kylo’s warning. She should have kept under the radar. _Where are you?_ she wonders desperately. _Tell me you aren’t just a figment of my mind. Tell me you’re real._

The sanitation bath was particularly unpleasant and the mere fact that two First Order soldiers stood only feet away from her stall watching her didn’t help matters. She was thankful for the thin divider wall guarding her lower body from view, but it was nevertheless humiliating. She’d made sure to scrub every inch of her body thoroughly so as not to repeat the process, this time with someone lording over her like some gloating gargoyle.

Currently, she sits in the passenger seat of a standard operation Spinner, one of the traditional vehicles of the First Order patrol. It glides effortlessly through the air as she stares out the glass side panels, her expression a practiced mask of indifference despite her tortured heartbeat. In front of them is their destination.

_The Black Needle._

A moonrunner has never gone to the Regent’s tower. _Ever._ Fear spikes her blood and she inhales carefully through her nose, furling her hands into fists at her lap as Kylo’s words play across her mind endlessly. _‘You’re running out of time.’_

Her gaze drops to the binders locked at her wrists. Is this how she is going to die?

_Rey, moonrunner of the Jakku Sector, a scrawny nobody with two faceless parents who never give a damn about her and fleeting friends who were swallowed up by some nebulous Resistance—the same friends who now question her loyalty—died today. No one knew; no one cared. The Regent didn’t even spare a glance at her corpse as he left the room._

She closes her eyes, resisting the urge to fold in on herself and forces her shoulders back, lengthening her spine until she sits ramrod straight. Sickness gurgles at her belly, but she does her best to ignore it as the simulated sun cuts in through the glass, bisecting her vision like the cruel swipe of a harvester's sickle.

She’d seen paintings once… of a darkly clad figure with a crescent-shaped blade fitted to the end of a crooked staff. Only the most elite of the dome collect such extravagances from the past. The Archives said the old civilization believed this creature to be the reaper of the dead. Isn’t it proper then, that he should bare a harvester’s weapon.

_When had she become so afraid?_

_When the prospect of death became more tangible_ , she supposes, looking at the three men who occupy this metal death box with her. Their pristine helmets assess her emptily, globose black sockets ironically flat like the surface of that limitless ocean in her dreams.

_I’ve been a child playing at a killer’s game. Teasing the dark, yet terrified of its inhabitants. Cowering, sniveling after some indistinct godhead of control._

_‘To disrupt harmony is to forfeit one’s raison d'etre…’_

Her eyes harden at the Black Needle and it glints back malevolently in reply. _What_ **_is_ ** _your raison d’etre?_ It seems to question. _Tell me, lowly moonrunner. Tell me the sins of your past… or do you not remember?_

Images flash before her mind’s eye, memory sensations and sounds which make her blood hot with animal desire. Savage emotions of possession, a metal face of ebony and silver, gloved hands searching, begging. And a novel idea of _dominion_.

 _“What the hell are you?”_ a distant voice whispers. Is that her voice?

The black mask of Kylo Ren gazes back at her impassively. _“What the hell are you?”_ He mimics, his modulated tone pleasant and smoky, like the tone of sacred murmurs in a place of worship.

He is kneeling in front of her, his broad armored shoulders hugged by her bare legs, gloved, abnormally long fingers curling at her inner thighs. She can feel the heat of him, the hellborn appetite licking at his under-flesh, threatening to catch him ablaze and consume them both.

Shaking her head, she bites viciously into her tongue and hastily locks these bizarre _—memories?—_ away, worried they might etch themselves across her face and betray her secret. She finds herself trembling, nipples hardened to aching points and core throbbing insistently as warm slick gathers in her underlings.

They touch down moments later, the telltale jolt a welcoming distraction for Rey, though of course, one fraught with terror. She gapes stupidly at the tower, her head tilting up and up and up. From this angle, it does appear like a stairway straight to the heavens, the rows and rows of glass windows glinting like countless diamond facets in the daylight. It’s no surprise citizens see this building as a place of magical power.

The supreme leader understood well the magnetism of imagery.

Her trio of guards escort her swiftly through the colossal rotating doors at the entrance to a private elevator several winding hallways into the first floor. The few other occupants of the building stare at her in uneasy bewilderment and her fear solidifies, twisting and tangling so firmly around her chest she’s sure her ribs will snap. Her instincts scream at her to run, to fight and get away, as far away as she can, but she merely steps aboard the lift in silence.

They are a perfect picture of death ritual, the three First Order guardsmen gathered around her as her entourage ushering her onward and the cumbrous binders circled at her wrists with her nails bitten raw, and her skin dirty, the weights of her judgement.

Above them, a fluorescent dial counts each floor: _6, 7, 8… 15…_

She drags in a shuddering breath. Seconds tick by.

_33…_

The elegant tile beneath her feet gleams, painstakingly perfect with its sharp patterned angles.

_45…_

Her heart squeezes, a phantom fist threatening to burst it like a balloon and she desperately clings to her facade of stoicism, but it’s crumbling.

_68—_

—the doors crisply slide open—

—and she is shoved forward, almost tripping over her own feet as she steps into a vast antechamber, sleek, obsidian chandeliers hanging below a ceiling of the same sharp patterned angles carved into marble, lined pillars bearing statues of powerful warriors atop them and tall, narrow windows of tinted glass. It’s magnificent. Grandiose. She looks ahead to the yawning archway beyond the pillars when pain suddenly grips her skull and she clamps her eyes shut against it, overcome with… rage.

An unknown memory speaks. _“We are lucky she was a success.”_

Then, that same decrepit rumble of thunder from her nightmares. _“Unfortunate, though that the queen did not survive outside of her. Your efforts, however beneficial to KOR-GENESIS, are no success, doctor.”_

_“Forgive me, supreme leader. We were lucky the other six survived.”_

_“But they are no queens.”_

_“No, your reverence.”_

_“If you weren’t so crucial to this experiment, I would have killed you long ago.”_ A pause _. “Let that be the needed motivation not to fail me again.”_

Tense silence.

_“Yes, supreme leader.”_

A rough shove knocks her out of the memory at once and she turns, teeth bared and fingers eager to hook into flesh, to tear and maim. She stops inches from one of the guardsmen’s masks, the frenzy scalding her veins not at all alien, not at all like what she’d felt when experiencing Kylo Ren’s ferocity secondhand. This emotion is _hers_ and it’s utterly intoxicating.

“Citizen 2514 of Jakku Sector.”

It’s as if an icy bucket of water douses her shoulders and she jerks back, temporarily discombobulated, drawing that already rigid spine even straighter. The terse interjection had come from behind her, but her fear freezes her to the spot. She doesn’t have to see his face to know his voice, the same voice that addresses the citizenry promptly every night via a pre-recorded broadcast. _The Regent._

“Bring her.”

The soldier she was menacing seconds ago grabs one of her arms and yanks her around. Another files in with a grip so tight on her bicep she’s sure her blood has ceased to her fingertips. They haul her forward with the third behind her, the barrel of a pulse rifle digging into her back.

_This is where she will die._

Her heart plummets past her stomach through the floor and her jaw goes slack, her tongue hanging like a limp mass of sour mud in her mouth. The back of her neck goes cold and she feels the crawl of a chill needling at the base of her spine, but she holds herself upright, keeps her steps solid and sure despite the terror choking her insides.

The stark head of auburn hair is unmistakable near one of the towering windows. He must have been standing there the entire time, she realizes; she’d simply missed him for the opulence of the room.

_Regent Armitage Hux._

As they move closer, Rey notices a tickle at the back of her mind, a curious twinge of something beating— _no_ , multiple somethings. Whatever they are, they’re right next to her, a rhythmic cadence of two beats, then a pause. They seem to thump over one another as if in an argument concerning the tempo, though she hasn't the time to wonder over them as the soldiers bring her to a stop three paces before her Regent.

Seeing him up close and in the flesh is an entirely different experience to a viewer screen. The domineering cut of his nose, the hungry, cool chips of blue in his eyes, the curl of his supercilious sneer—all of it amplified by the distinct dimness of the room. No overhead stage lights to wash out the permanent scowl lines between his brows, no makeup to hide the very obnoxious circles under his eyes. And the way he studies her, like she is the most unfortunate thing in the room.

“I usually abstain from mingling with riffraff, citizen, but as you may have guessed, the situation calls for such circumstances.” he begins.

Rey remains perfectly still.

“It has been called to my attention that you, citizen 2514, have had possible contact with Resistance fighters.”

 _Is this the same thing that happened to Jessika?_ Rey wonders. _Before they killed her…_ But would they have brought her directly to the Regent like this? Wouldn’t they have just interrogated her and tortured the information out of her prior to delivering it to the Regent? Those questions alone curdle her blood with dread.

_Why has she been brought here?_

“We have standard protocol for dealing with these types of matters, but this is no standard situation.” the Regent continues, walking over and glancing out the window to the city. “I had preferred to handle this little problem personally, what with my truncated timetable.”

Rey frowns at him, his words piercing through her fear and stirring her curiosity. _He’s dancing around something._

“This isn’t the first time you’ve left the Jakku Sector. Is it citizen?”

Her hands wriggle slightly in the binders, wishing to pull at the hem of her shirt. “No, Regent.”

He grins, a slow peeling of the lips over immaculate white teeth. “You accessed the Intelligence Bureau’s databank several months ago. Did you find anything interesting, Rey?”

His use of her name throws her and she gapes at him, unsure of how to respond.

“Don’t be shy.” He chides sportively. “Who do you think it was who let you get away with it?”

Rey’s insides twist with panic.

“Answer!” he barks.

The barrel of the gun behind her digs into her spine and she averts her eyes, like a child caught in the act— _like a citizen before its godhead_. “A file… with naked source code.”

“The name of the file!” he snaps impatiently.

Her lungs constrict and she swallows profusely, unable to speak above a whisper. “KOR-GENESIS.”

“Yes.” he says. “Ironic, isn’t it?”

She looks up at him in bewilderment. “What?”

“Nevermind.” He exhales with a dismissive wave of his hand. “Let’s go back to the Resistance. You’ve had contact with some of their members, yes?”

A hot flash of anger suddenly travels up from the roots of her feet and Rey recognizes the callous, predatory edge at once. This other self, a novel and deadly creature who finds no sorrow for a dead boy in the middle of the street, and no torment over the vital question of loyalty, engulfs and overshadows her completely. Hux also appears to sense the change, because his grin fades, a flicker of unease passing over his face.

“No.” The lie slips effortlessly from her mouth as she mimics his flippant tone. One part of her panics at this, while another smiles, a deviant and rapacious smile.

Hux’s jaw tightens. “You know it’s a crime to lie to an authority of the dome, and it’s considered _treason_ to commit such an act on your Regent.”

“It is.” Rey acknowledges, feeling cool anticipation roll over her skin like a night breeze. “But that would negate your reason for having me brought here, wouldn’t it, honorable Regent?”

Hux stares at her, flabbergasted, then hastily collects himself. “How presumptuous,” he drawls.

She burrows into his gaze with her own, noting the slight sheen of turmoil within those chips of blue. Her outward confidence grows. “As you say, you’ve customary protocol… and this isn’t customary.” she says.

The soldiers shift around her nervously and she feels their attention darting between her, and their Regent. _What to do now_ , the predatory Rey in her croons.

“Leave us.” Hux’s whisper slices through the quiet like a jarring blade.

The soldiers merely stand there for a moment, obviously confused by their Regent’s choice of orders, while Rey sees the gap between her and this other self slowly, surely converging.

“Now!” he snarls.

The trance of the room breaks and the walls seem to draw in a long needed breath Rey hadn’t realized the world had been holding, and she releases it back out, body trembling. The fissures within her are closing, the torrent of memories creeping nearer, _nearer_.

Then, the cadence of beats begin again. So much faster, now. Thundering gallops of tempo like… like—heartbeats. _Heartbeats._ Her mouth falls open at the realization. They are the heartbeats of the people in the room. How can she possibly hear them?

“Are you certain, honorable Regent?” one of the guardsmen asks. “To leave you alone with her—is that a wise—”

“You will do as ordered.” Hux interjects brusquely. “Now, go and wait for her in the ground floor lobby.”

A second more of anxious silence passes before the barrel of the weapon is removed from her back, followed by retreating footfalls, the crisp sigh of the elevator doors opening, closing; then nothing.

Minutes tick by.

Sunset glows through the tinted windows.

“You look like you haven’t slept in days.” Hux opines.

She focuses on the hanging gardens of the Varykino Sector. It’s a marvelous sight even from this distance. Everyone in the dome can see it, though Jakku has a skim view of its beauty; just its peak, a pearly spear of emerald on the skyline. Her eyes follow the labyrinthine structure, up its spiraling crest to its bejeweled tip. Like a beacon on a temple in the midst of some fairytale jungle.

Her body longs for green, for rain, for sunlight.

Hux circles behind her, walking to the middle of the room and weaving a leisurely path through the pillars. She turns and watches him warily, feeling a little more like her self, or maybe a little less. She isn’t sure anymore. All she does know is that whatever has awakened inside of her is becoming more _her_ than she is. _How the hell does that even make sense?_

The Regent finally comes to a halt at the center of the pillars and turns to face her. His eyes convey what he wants and she advances cautiously, though with less fear than before. Granted, she approaches this time without the heavy arms of the soldiers or a pulse rifle at her back, but it’s more than that.

She feels bolder... deadlier.

And he’s watching her too, assessing every move she makes, the slight swing of her gait, her arms as they thump lightly at her center due to the binders, her breathing, her silence. The expression of disdain has fled his face, as well, replaced with a calculating prudence she reads all too clearly.

Rey stops five paces from him and waits.

He stares down his nose at her, determining his words carefully. “I’ve reviewed your records. You were originally a part of Supremacy Sector, the centermost sector of the dome. However, your parents abandoned you, so you were relocated to Jakku Sector.”

She stiffens at the mention of her parents.

He observes this with an inscrutable expression, taking a step forward before continuing. “It was one of the things you’d hoped to find the night you hacked into our databank, wasn’t it? To see who they were, why they left you.”

Pain blooms in her chest, rancorous, loitering, like an unwelcome visitor casually destroying the hallowed shrine of a temple. Something in her sways, threatening to topple over and crash apart.

He picks up on her anguish and a smirk tugs at his lips. “You couldn’t find anything could you?”

His words sting like the cut of a knife, because they are true. She hadn’t wanted to admit it back then, couldn’t admit it. No matter how true. A part of her had hoped to find something, _anything_ that could give her an answer, if only a small one. She didn’t care; she just needed answers. When she came up empty-handed, she’d buried the memory deep enough she wouldn’t have to visit it again. She’d convinced herself her only objective had been the Resistance, then KOR-GENESIS had pervaded her mind like a opportune mist and she’d forgotten.

Hux closes the space between them, hovering mere inches from her face. He smells so bitingly clean, sharp like the geometric patterns all around them. “You want to know a secret, Rey?” he whispers. “Our databank shows no record of your parents.”

Her heart stops. “What?”

“There’s no record of them ever having existed. Strange, isn’t it?” he purrs.

She shakes her head, speechless, confounded. Millions of questions assail her at once, pounding into her skull with ruthless abandon as emotions burn at her eyes. Something wet trickles down her cheek and she knows Hux’s eyes are following a tear to the corner of her mouth.

Eventually, he steps back and straightens his collar. “You may go now, citizen 2514.”

Her legs are nonexistent as she shuffles to the elevator, her head spinning, throbbing, heart cracking. Breaking.

“Oh, and citizen.” Hux calls after her.

She stops. Turns. But he is nothing more than a wavering blur.

“Remember your raison d'etre.” He says covertly, then, louder: “I trust this conversation will go no further.”

There’s no need for a reply. She simply steps onto the elevator, allowing the doors to hiss crisply shut behind her before she sinks down to her knees, the binders clinking on the marble floor.

 

 

x

. x .

x

 

Days pass.

Long days.

 

x

. x .

x

 

Kaydel’s half eaten chocolate bar rests in her hand, a fresh bite taken from it. Beyond the gloom of the cave dust storms howl and roar as Rey stares dejectedly at the ground, the fluorescent blue of her helmet casting a ghostly glow over the jagged walls and giving the cave an otherworldly appearance.

_Who am I? Or would ‘what’ be more appropriate?_

Uncrossing her legs, she leans back into the rough rock wall and sprawls her legs out before her. The unforgiving surface of limestone needles into her spine, though she ignores it and focuses on the glint of the chocolate bar wrapper. Kaydel had been sitting across from her in this very cave not so long ago, yet it feels like someone else’s life now. It’s the same with her visit to the Black Needle and her bizarre conversation with the Regent. Only a week ago and despite that it seems like a century, but the bitter pain of those tears have yet to relent. Fresh salt gathers in her eyes and she blinks it away.

How can the Intelligence Bureau have no record of her parents? Were they connected to the birth of the Resistance in some way? Were they murdered? Was their information erased? The Regent could undoubtedly be lying to use her somehow, but…

 _Kylo? If you can hear me, please answer. Please._ She pulls her knees up to her chest and cradles herself against the arctic chill. _I’ve never felt so alone._

She stares down at the shiny bite marks she made on the chocolate bar as she waits, but no reply ever comes. Her skull is as silent as the fractured emptiness in her chest and she can feel herself teetering, the edge of her sanity beckoning her to just let go.

 _I can’t keep doing this. I can’t stay this way. I’m not_ —

— _I’m not_ me _anymore._

 _Or was I ever me? Was I always someone else?_ Something _else?_

Rey presses her head into her knees as she succumbs to quiet sobs. Whatever this feeling is, this strange vacillation between groomed subservience and a rage so deep it melts her bones, she knows like it will massacre her, eventually. And it has always been there, she realizes, understanding now; all those times she’d felt disobedient, all those times she’d deliberately tempted fate.

She’d been tempting the _godhead_ and he had finally called her to that cursed needle.

_‘Rey?’_

She jerks up abruptly, startled by the faint whisper.

_‘Rey.’_

Her heart leaps to her throat. _Kylo?_

_‘Where are you?’_

Elation pours from her chest and she smiles automatically, leaning into his presence. It’s warm, blanketing her skin like how she imagines real sunlight to be. _Kylo. I’m glad... you’re here._

He swathes his gossamer presence around her like giant wings and she revels in it, breathing in a scent she knows is his and feeling the press of a kiss to her ear. _‘I think I’m dreaming.’_ he murmurs against her skin. _‘I wanted to tell you something, something important, but I’ve forgotten.’_

 _I’ve missed you._ She presses back into his embrace, no longer feeling the dull edges of the rock wall and throwing caution to the wind for all else except that captivating warmth.

_‘I want you.’_

The assertion is so basic, so primal and full of reptilian possessiveness that it makes her toes curl in delight. She imagines him in the dark, creeping up to her from the shadows like a caged animal, all teeth and hands, lips and tongue, devouring her.

He senses her desire and his pleasure pulsates like fire through her veins, rendering her a braided wick of cotton, catching and holding his flame in the gloom. Images flash through her mind’s eye of wandering touches, gray, slanted walls, low lights and a naked form kneeling in front of her.

 _I should kill him_ , a rogue thought floats up from the depths. _It’s what I came to do._

Swiftly, the images come to focus, throwing this bizarre world into vivid contrast and she marvels at the figure in front of her. His face is hidden beneath a curtain of disheveled, black hair, the muscles of his shoulders taunt and outlined by the darkness as he grasps her now naked hips with his wet mouth hovering mere inches above her sex. His lips gleam as he grins, revealing a set of perfect, knife-like teeth. Her eyes roam further, shocked as she finds segments of dark-textured skin—alien flesh—accentuating the dominant curve of his spine.

Her core throbs as he dips his head, dragging his lower lip up the folds of her cunt to the sensitive bundle of nerves. For one terrifying moment, she fears he might actually devour her, tearing into her flesh like a barbaric fiend, but the anticipation drugging her senses leaves her motionless. Flicking out his tongue, he teases the pink little bud which makes her gasp aloud and she stares in rapt fascination as he raises his head, arresting her with his eyes.

Liquid night, poison amber, demon fire—all of them accurate descriptions for such devilish magic. The rest of him is equally as magnetic, from the awkward length of his nose to the facial moles to the jagged scar down his cheek, all of it spellbinding.

And those full, wet lips.

He leans down again, holding her eyes all the while as he begins to suckle at her, urging the heat of her body to soaring heights. She reaches forward, blindly anchoring her hands in his hair as her legs curl tightly around his shoulders. His fingertips ghost along her skin, deadly claws summoning a blanket of gooseflesh down her legs, over her chest, up her arms. She tosses her head back, clamping her eyes shut and emitting ungodly sounds of pleasure as she jerks viciously at his scalp, demanding more. His name tumbles through her teeth and Rey bows forward, pulling as much of him as close to her as she can.

The cool touch of something coiling around her waist surprises her and she looks down to find a tail encircling her protectively. _His tail._ She blinks, momentarily distracted.

 _You have a tail?_ She gapes.

He groans in reply, sending a fresh song of sensation along her nerve endings and making her sing for him, mewling into the gloom of the cave unabashed. His tail twitches contentedly and she reaches up on instinct, petting along its dusky spines. His back suddenly arches and his claws dig bruises into her hips, drawing blood. The pain mingles with pleasure and she throws her body back, opening up for him completely and running the soles of her feet along his upper torso like wandering hands.

 _You’re sensitive there_ , she smirks, wriggling her hips.

 _Yes_ , he growls, unrelenting as he licks hungrily at her sex.

She keens, so close to the bewildering white wave of euphoria that comes with orgasm. But this time it’s more, _much_ more. Kylo ravages her with kisses and bites over the aroused flesh of her inner thighs as his hands close upon her aching breasts and she squirms, a steady chorus of ‘ _yes’_ , ‘ _faster’_ and ‘ _there’_ flooding the air around them. He hums against her flesh, his tongue dipping over and over into her cunt, driving her to the feral edges of madness. She digs red crescents into his shoulders as his tail tightens around her like a vice, his own arousal whispering beneath the fever pitch of her lust.

Then, his tongue swipes up her folds and his mouth closes over that aching bundle; his teeth cinch down and she’s seeing stars. Her legs spasm as the wave hits, flooding over her in a blinding rush and leaving her quaking. She screams, driving her head back into the ground and pulling at him desperately in her bid to keep them connected.

And through her delirium she comes to one startling conclusion.

This isn’t just his dream. This is a memory.

_Their memory._

 

x

. x .

x

 

 

She sleeps better than she has in months, but her peace can’t last forever.

 

x

. x .

x

 

They’re waiting for her a couple days later. She can sense them even before she opens the door, like phantoms in the predawn blackness haunting the farthest corners of her hovel. The question is, what do they want? But she thinks she has an idea. Regardless, she isn’t in the mood tonight, or this morning, or whatever.

“I know you’re there!” Rey snaps. “I can smell the underground on you.”

She no longer questions the eerie hyper awareness of her senses. There’s no point and she sure as hell doesn’t have the patience right now. She’d meant to wash up before heading home, but the public facilities seemed to be on lockdown, a prevalent thing as of late. That and Plutt’s obnoxious, beady eyes regarding her strangely as she’d delivered her quota for the night.

The two intruders step forward and Rey is not surprised in the least by their faces. _Of course it would be these two._ She gives them a fleeting scowl, then grabs a set of sleep clothes and walks behind a divider wall to change.

“You’re name’s Rey, right?” the man pipes up. “I’m Finn.”

She rolls her eyes as she slips the baggy shirt over her head.

A beat of silence passes.

So the other woman won’t be giving her name. Rey scoffs. This doesn’t surprise her, either. Once dressed, she steps out from behind the wall, arms crossed. “What are you doing in my home?”

“That’s a good question.” the girl grumbles, staring heatedly at Finn.

He shakes his head at her and faces Rey again. “Listen. We need your help.”

“Do we?” the girl snipes.

“Rose!” he hisses.

“If you two don’t get to the point, I’ll just report you.” Rey snarls.

The two gawk at her, fear flickering across their expressions.

An instant stab of regret radiates from her gut, but she’s too tired to apologize. “Just get to the point.” she says, softening her tone.

Finn takes a deep breath, preparing his words cautiously. “We know about your connection to his beast, to Kylo Ren. We need your help finding him. They’ve moved him from his last known location after our previous strike.”

Rey bristles at once. “Why? What do you want with Kylo?”

“We want nothing to do with that _thing_ other than separating him from the supreme leader.” Rose flashes daggers at her.

It’s almost surreal talking with anyone—even ones who use the terms ‘beast’ or ‘thing’—about the voice that has lived in her head for so long; that this voice has a physical body, a life force she can touch and _taste_ , thrills her to the bone. But then, her attention focuses on the other subject of conversation. “I’m sorry… supreme leader? As in Osric Snoke?”

“Yes.” Finn supplies with a straight face.

Rey simply gapes at him, dumbfounded.

“I bet he’s due for another dose up soon. That’s why the monster has been moved.” Rose adds. “The scientist says it takes a while to prep before the transfusion.”

“Wait.” Rey shakes her head. “What you’re saying is impossible. The supreme leader died over a hundred and fifty years ago.”

The two study her for a long time, neither one of them speaking. Then, Finn steps forward, his tone low. “We thought after you saved us you might remember things, but I guess it hasn’t all come back yet.” He hesitates, glancing to Rose before continuing. “To be honest, we don’t even know if we can trust you.”

“The feelings mutual.” Rey drawls.

Finn purses his lips. “Look, all we need you to do is get the creature away from Snoke long enough for us to do what we need to.”

Rey huffs out an annoyed breath. “You’re insane.”

“I think you know better than that.” Rose retorts waspishly.

“And I’m supposed to trust you? I don’t even know who you are!” Rey asserts, her patience gone.

“And what? We trust you?” Rose sneers, throwing a quick glare Finn’s way, then turning her cold eyes back on Rey. “Like you’re even human?! Give me a fucking break! You’re probably more monster than he is now. It doesn’t matter how human you _look_! KOR-GENESIS saw to that! By all rights, you aren’t even the same person who fought beside Luke Skywalker and Leia Organa! You’re just a clone! An empty body for—”

“Rose!” Finn roars. “That’s enough!”

Something inside Rey suddenly snaps, like a dislocated joint forcibly shoved back into its place. Stygian fog curls at the edges of her vision and her head fills with static as the pounding organ in her chest becomes a distant, almost inaudible thing. _A clone?_ Hux’s words resurface in her mind.

_‘There’s no record of them ever having existed. Strange, isn’t it?’_

_Did he know, too?_

_Does everyone know but me?_

Rose’s voice comes through the static, though vaguely. “Look at her, Finn. She’s unbalanced. I told you it was a mistake coming here.”

“Kaydel wanted us—”

“Poe gave us orders not to!”

Rey tries to make sense of their argument, but the blackness around her vision deepens and, eventually, total darkness. The last thing she remembers is a pair of small arms grasping at her shoulders.

 

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**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **PLEASE REMEMBER TO LEAVE ME SOME FEEDBACK!  
> ** **CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM IS WELCOME!**  
>    
> 
> 
> **Chapter References:**  
>  [Spinner (Blade Runner)](http://bladerunner.wikia.com/wiki/Spinner)
> 
> 222 P.C. (Post Cataclysm)


	3. Part III: Consummation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **A/N:** And here I thought this project would only be 3 parts. How naive I was. A _lot_ happens in this installment. Brace yourselves! I was actually going to cut this part a little shorter and include the smut scene in part iv, but I didn't think it was fair to deprive all of you and make you wait. Lol! I hope it satisfies. ^^; I'd aimed to have this published by my birthday on the 11th, but that plan fell through. Nevertheless, I apologize for the delay and hope you enjoy! And before you say anything about the end of this installment... I'm sorry? *hides*
> 
>  **MUSIC LIST:** [The Sunken Valleys - Ruptured World](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=04yyB3juVgc) @ 1:20 for the nighttime conversation between Finn and Rey, [Angel - Massive Attack](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xiK2JlBpzvI) for the scene after Rey leaves Poe in search of Kylo and for Rey's alien voice I was jammin' to [Apex Predator - Otep](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bxVkAAh2D7M) and [Big Bad Wolf - In This Moment](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j-qQ_brIsfY) in case anyone wants to hear those. 
> 
> _** These warnings are broken down a little different, because they're more numerous. Please make sure to read them! **_
> 
>  **CHAPTER WARNINGS:**  
>  \- Masturbation / Force Bond Voyeurism / Light Body-Controlled Fondling
> 
> \- Referenced Pregnancy Mention From Rey to Another Character / Cruel Rey
> 
> \- Referenced Murder by Past Rey's Hands / Questionable Actions, etc.
> 
> \- Surgical Scarring and Modifications / Described Abuse / Mild to Moderate Body Horror **(What Snoke has done to Kylo is extremely cruel, so tread carefully!)**
> 
> \- Full Contact Aggressive Sex / Scratching / Marking / Light Blood Description / Wrestling For Dominance / Savage Rey / REY THE ULTIMATE TEASE / Possessive Kylo / Rough Riding / Unintended ( _totally_ intended) Interruption From AutoReiv

**♚ ✶ PART III MUSIC ✶ ♕**

_(The smut music pretty much.)_

 

* * *

.

_"Magnetic everything about you.  
You really got me, now."_

- Hypnotic, Zella Day

.

* * *

 

 

She’d lost her sense of time, of place. _When?_

“Rey! Come in Rey!” a feminine voice demands over droning static. “You damn well better be alive.”

Is she dreaming again?

Small dots of light materialize in front of her, green, red and blue; they form the expansive length of a control panel. Ahead of this control panel slants translucent planes she innately knows are made of tempered alumino-silicate. It’s the viewport of a ship’s cockpit. She knows this, because it is _her_ ship.

Rey settles into her captain's chair, exhaustion leached into her bones and her head ravaged by a battering ram of a headache. As she reaches for the comlink she notes the sheen of drying blood caked to her arms, the scrapes and fresh bruising, the ache of a severely sprained wrist. “It’s done, general. The facility has been destroyed.” Her voice grates against her throat like sandpaper, like stabbing needles, but she resists the urge to cough.

A drink of water would be a godsend right now.

“What about the rest of your team, captain?” Though the general’s tone betrays that she already knows the answer.

“Gone.”

A short pause. “At least you made it out. Now get your ass back to home planet. The worst is over, Rey. Come on home.”

Something like despair twists her gut. “It’s not over. Not yet.”

A long pause. “What do you mean?”

Rey’s tongue feels akin to lead in her mouth. Her throat throbs. “I’ve been infected. I… I can’t come home.”

Dead static.

Then, the general speaks softly, coaxing. “Head back to base, captain. We’ll have a medical team ready to remove—”

“No general.”

“Rey.” Unsteady emotion quavers in the older woman’s voice. “Don’t fuck with me. Do you hear me? _Don’t you_ **_dare_ ** _._ You get your ass back to earth. That’s an order!”

Tears sting Rey’s eyes. “We can’t risk it. You know that Leia. Snoke will do anything to keep this species alive.”

“Rey.” Her voice drops barely above a whisper. “I’ve lost everything to this war, my entire family. And my son is…” she pauses, centering herself. “I will not lose you, too.”

An uncomfortable itch blooms out over Rey’s chest and she closes her eyes, letting the tears trail down her cheeks. “I’m sorry.” The words drag from her lips like millstones, carrying with them the last of her resolve.

“Rey—”

“Good bye, general.” she chokes back a sob.

“Rey!”

She kills the link and her hand falls from the control panel, eyes still closed as she breathes slowly, in and out, in and out. Rey can’t feel it growing yet, but she will. Her muscles melt into the ratty cushions of the chair and she thinks back to a moment in time, a sunset against a windswept horizon, dusky rose mingled with plume; Leia standing beside her, hair loose for the first time and the threads of silver tinged gold in the dying light, pale cheeks awash with color from the sun and velvet dark eyes lingering on the rising moon.

Rey remembers this moment so vividly. It had been the first moment she saw the woman, not the general of the Resistance. She saw the sister, the wife… the mother. And Rey had fallen in love with her as that sun had sank below the horizon, watching as the shadows darkened over her aging face and the light dimmed from her eyes.

.

.

She starts from the dream with a lump of sorrow in her throat and bitter tears searing at her eyes. Wiping furiously at them, she tries to steady her breathing, the thick of the memory settling over her like a fibrous web, reminding her of its totality. It had been the last time she’d spoken to Leia. A moan escapes her and she bites furiously at her lip, focusing on that image of the sun. _The sun._ Her old life knew the sun, knew a caring mother even if not by blood, a father… a family.

_His family._

“Kylo.” she whispers.

An abrupt commotion of voices on the other side of the wall freezes her rigid and the last twenty-four hour’s worth of events comes slamming back into her. _I’ve been cloned. I’m not… human, anymore, or maybe I’ve never been human. I’m. No one._ A part of her wants to curl in on herself, to spite this reality by simply wasting away in the void of ignorance, but she shoves it aside and focuses on her anger, allowing it to bolster her defiance.

She must have fainted from shock after Rose’s revelation and they wouldn’t have left her there, not when the AutoReivs could track them to her residence, so they’d brought her with them. To the underground. Unease permeates her veins as she peers warily into the gloom around her. Whatever is awakening inside her must be hastening, because her sight has magnified tenfold and she can hear four separate heartbeats _through_ the wall. She can even distinguish that two of them are female.

_How is that possible?_

“What the hell were you thinking bringing her here?!” a male voice barks.

_Poe._

“I was doing what needed to be done!” another man retorts sharply— _Finn_.

“The Regent has already brought her to his tower. We’re lucky he hasn’t figured out what she is!”

 _Kaydel._ Rey’s heart swells with pained joy at the sound of her voice.

“And I told you not to risk exposure by following her too closely.” Poe fires back.

“I wasn’t just going to leave her unguarded—”

“She isn’t one of us!” Poe’s shout booms like vengeful thunder. “The Resistance can’t risk any losses and I will not allow one clone to compromise the lives of our people, including you! Our situation is too precarious. You know that, Connix!”

“You can’t fault her for wanting to protect her friend, Poe.” Rose speaks at last, calm, collected.

“But I can fault both of you for bringing Snoke’s little science pet down _here_!” he declares.

“They didn’t track us!” Finn defends hotly. “I covered our asses and you forget, Poe, I was once one of them! I know how they operate, machine and human alike!”

“Finn—”

“Arguing like this won’t change the fact that she’s here.” Rose interrupts, raising her decibel level to match Poe’s, while maintaining that same neutral edge. “What’s done is done.”

A long stretch of silence.

Rey sits up, staring at the old cast iron door leading into the next room. Their hearts still beat loud and clear, none of them moving, none of them leaving. She can imagine them standing there all staring heatedly at one another, all save the woman, Rose.

Rising carefully from the bed, she experiments with her feet, applying weight to one foot, then the other, finding no dizziness, no exhaustion. _How long have I been out_ , she wonders and makes her way across the room. The door valve feels gritty with erosion as she tests to see if it will open. It turns without restraint and she shoves the slab of metal aside with a grunt.

She feels more than sees them all snap their heads in her direction and she stands in the doorway, the shadows cast around her like a shawl of death. Her eyes instantly fall on Kaydel, the other woman freshly dressed and hair loose about her shoulders. Rey stares, transfixed. She’s never seen Kaydel with it down.

“Rey.” she murmurs, throat bobbing with a swallow.

Rey can’t help the smile that lights her face. “You look a damn sight better than the last time I saw you.” The assertion falls too easily from her mouth and she bites her tongue, glancing around at the others.

They all regard her with leery eyes.

Kaydel takes a step toward her. “I’m so glad you’re alright. I saw them taking you to the Black Needle. I was so sure he’d take you to Snoke. I was ready to storm the damn place.”

“And you would have cost us the war.” Poe grumbles.

“But she didn’t.” Finn injects quickly before turning to Rey. “Besides, Kaydel sent us after Rey and now she’s here, so everything is fine.”

Rose scoffs.

Poe’s scowl deepens.

And Kaydel takes another three steps closer. She’s within arms reach. “What did he do to you?”

The happiness Rey feels at seeing her friend fades, suddenly overwhelmed by anger and hurt. Her expression drains of emotion and she regards Kaydel callously. “You knew the moment you left, didn’t you? You knew I was a clone and you never told me.”

Shame eclipse’s Kaydel gaze and she lowers her head. She doesn’t speak at first, the tendons along her neck pronounced and jaw taut. “I didn’t know how and I couldn’t compromise the Resistance.” Her eyes lift back to Rey’s. “I wanted to know for sure. I wanted to know—”

“If I was going to sprout horns and fangs, and feast on your liver like some monster out of a fairytale!” Rey snarls.

The click of pulse rifles follow her outburst and the edges of the room flood with Resistance soldiers, all of their weapons leveled at her and the thin red beams of their sights dotting her grimy clothes in electric crimson. Rey’s insides wither at the vacant look of hostility on their faces and she very nearly bares her teeth at them. _Wouldn’t that fit the picture so nicely_ , she mutters to herself. A perfect caricature of what they _want_ to see. In the end, she merely recedes back into the darkness, hands stiffly at her sides and the rage in her gut set to a low simmer.

“Those aren’t necessary!” Kaydel shouts.

“I’ll be the judge of that.” Poe retorts icily.

Kaydel turns to him, her face one of exasperation. “She’s one of us, Poe.”

Rey’s attention drifts from them to Rose who opens her mouth to argue, but Finn hurriedly stops her with a rough pinch on the shoulder. She glares at him testily and Rey is certain she will pay his jaw back in kind, but, surprisingly, she simply spins on her heel and exits the larger room in a flurry of irritation. Finn looks after her, though does not follow. No doubt choice words will be exchanged between them later.

Looking back to Poe, Rey finds his chafing glare centered on her. She cocks an eyebrow at him, throwing aside those old memories of laughing with him at the Jakku tavern, getting shit-faced drunk one night—the only night she’d ever dared such a thing—and needing both him, and Kaydel to help her inside her home. She can see in his eyes that he has done away with those memories. The Rey he sees before him isn’t the same young woman.

_Still..._

“Lower your weapons.” he says, relinquishing a tired sigh.

The soldiers glance at him, reluctant.  

“Don’t make me repeat myself.” he warns.

“Sir?” one of them quests, giving Rey a skeptical once over.

“Do it!” he yells.

A chorus of clicks, clanking metal against steel chest plates and shifting bodies with eyes for the monster in the room. Rey’s insides curdle further and she thinks she might just sell her soul to spit venom, or acid; acid would be quite the useful feature for this monster business.  

Kaydel approaches her, placing a reassuring hand on her shoulder. “Let’s go to a place we can talk. _Alone_.” She shoots a pointed scowl at Poe.

He shakes his head, though does not oppose her. Instead, he motions toward Finn. “As long as he goes with you.”

Kaydel purses her lips but nods, satisfied.

“It better be somewhere to eat, because I’m starving.” Rey opines, not caring for the awkward silence that follows.

Twenty minutes later, they sit in what substitutes as the Resistance cafeteria, a massive cavity hollowed out from the old bedrock, its uneven walls lined with makeshift fluorescent lighting and three long metal tables at its center, each stretching the entire length of the room. Other tunnels have been burrowed through the rock as well, winding into unknown regions of the underground. When Rey had thought of the massive tunnels and sewer networks down here, she’d never suspected the Resistance to be building _more_.

 _The other domes_ , the alien part of her whispers. _And here you thought the Resistance so small. Silly girl._

But if that’s the case, if the Resistance has the numbers, why not attack the First Order in force? Why these middling gorilla tactics? And why need her help at all? Unless, there’s another element holding them back, an unseen element.

Shaking the thoughts from her head, Rey refocuses on her food.

She eats like a barbarian, deliberately grunting and smacking her lips as Finn and Kaydel sit opposite her, both of them wearing growing expressions of amusement. Kaydel looks about ready to surrender a fit of obnoxious laughter and Finn’s scrunched nose suggests he isn’t far behind. Rey, on the other hand, looks ready to set them on fire, her food stuffed in her cheeks and her jaw working ardently. She can’t fault them, however. This moment feels light, almost nostalgic, so opposite to the recent truths which have revealed themselves. And for her to be sitting here, eating her food with little to no manners, a petulant expression on her face—well, she’d laugh at the sight, too.    

“You look like an angry chipmunk.” Kaydel snickers.

“How would you know what one looks like?” Finn challenges, a smirk tugging at his pleasant mouth.

Kaydel rolls her eyes. “Rey wasn’t the only one snooping around the Main Archives.”  

“Yeah, and it nearly got you killed. You’re lucky I was there that night.” Finn replies.

“The first night you’d defected.” Kaydel muses. “You were dragging Poe’s sorry, wounded ass right beside us, too.”

Finn looks away self consciously. “I was just doing what I felt was right.”

“You could have done nothing.” Kaydel points out.

Finn leaves his answer to the silence and Rey watches them, noting the ease of their camaraderie, the rhythmic movements, completely in sync with one another. Kaydel belongs here to this group of people, to this family… and she _knows_ it. She is confident in it. Finn knows he belongs here, too.

Jealousy poisons Rey’s appetite and she swallows the lump of bread in her throat with a grimace before pushing the tray away.

“Not hungry?” Finn asks.

Kaydel gives her a concerned stare. “What’s wrong, Rey?” Then, as if realizing the mockery of such a question she clears her throat. “Just say it, whatever it is.”

Rey peers down at her hands, slipping them below the table to her lap where she picks at her nails. How can any of this be put into words? How can she _just say it_? So instead, she selects a more straightforward route. “What do you want from me?”

The question is elementary enough, isn’t it? One plus one equals two, right?

Their shared expressions drop, the light departing their eyes in one swift utterance of words. Rey measures them, the freshly eaten food in her belly turning sourer with each passing second of silence. Needing something else to do with her hands, she pulls her hair down and combs her fingers through it. Two days worth of sweat and work wafts around her face, and she frowns uncomfortably.

“I already told you what we need.” Finn answers at last. “We need you to find the monster and spirit him away from Snoke. Let us handle the rest.”

“Say I believe you. Say Snoke is alive. What do you plan to do after you dispose of him and his Regent?” Rey crosses her arms. “What do you plan on doing with Kylo? With me?”

“Nothing as long as you don’t give us a reason to.” Poe’s voice calls from the adjacent hallway. He enters alone, a fresh set of clothes on his person and his raven hair slicked to his skull. “You’re not our enemy, Rey.”

“Then why do I get the distinct impression I’m unwelcome here.” she bites frostily, turning on the bench to glower at him.

“I didn’t say you were an ally, either.” he clarifies, stopping in front of them. “Your old self betrayed the Resistance over two hundred years ago to side with Kylo Ren.”

“But you know as well as I do from Leia Organa’s video diaries that Kylo Ren turned on Snoke, too.” Kaydel butts in. “He did it in an attempt to save Rey.”

“Proving my point,” Poe says stiffly. “Their loyalties lie only with each other.”

Rey attempts to steady the ire in her voice. “You know me, Poe. We were friends when you still lived in Jakku Sector. You know I would never betray Kaydel or _you_.”

He stares at her for an eternity, the wheels of his mind working while she all but expels steam from her ears. A part of her can understand why he would be wary, but she’s still _her_ , still Rey, the same orphaned girl who struggled through the harsh desert for scraps, the same teenager who helped Poe out of a jam by sharing some of those same scraps and forfeiting her quota that night.

 _I’m still me!_ She wants to shout. _God damn you, Poe! I’m Rey! I’ll_ always _be Rey!_

“Why don’t we show her some of those video diaries and the ship’s log?” Finn suggests into the stillness.

Poe glances at him, dazed from whatever thoughts vexing his mind and nods. “Good idea. That might help things along.”

Rey stands, not bothering to wait for the others.

“Rose knows how to run the old machine.” Finn says, dusting off his trousers as he rises to his feet. “I’ll go find her.”

 

x

. x .

x

 

Water cascades down her naked back, soaking her hair and opening her pours to the heat. She lingers under the outdated shower head, body shivering, mind numb. Seeing Leia’s face, gaunt and miserable as she recounted endless years of war, then the last months… _the tears._ Rey bites down hard on her lower lip. She still doesn’t remember everything, but hearing her old general narrating how a son had fallen under the spell of Osric Snoke, how he murdered his own father—a pain had come with that knowledge, but not a memory, not quite yet.

She wipes her face, smearing the hair from her forehead and pressing her cheek to the cool tile wall. This little shower stall is intimate, albeit rather cramped, but different. It’s nice, in a secret kind of way. Her heart echoes in her skull, twittering like a caged bird as she calls to him, seeking the fullness she feels when he haunts her mind, needing it like a starving child.

He doesn’t answer at first. Straining harder, she hugs her waist, pressing her fingernails into skin. She focuses on the tiny points of pain, utilizing them like oxygen to a flame.

_‘Rey.’_

His voice is so distant, so weak. _What is Snoke doing to him?_ Her teeth snap shut in an animal grimace and she reaches, clawing at the distance between them.

_Kylo._

A feather-light caress along her consciousness, nothing more.

She groans in frustration, sliding her hands down to her hips and digging bruises there. _Kylo_ , she tries again.

 _‘You’re remembering,’_ he murmurs, a tenderness woven through his voice. _‘Me, too. I’m remembering it all, Rey.’_

_I remember your mother. Did you truly kill your own father? I don’t know how to feel, anymore. I don’t know what to think—I..._

Heavy silence.

_Kylo?_

_‘Touch yourself.’_

_What?_

_‘Please, Rey.’_ Ghostly tendrils wrap along her wrists and her hands are moving, skimming up her torso to her breasts, fingers curling, cupping the supple flesh. _‘I want to feel you touch yourself.’_

She inhales a tremulous breath, hot water running over her eyelashes, making them heavy, making her eyes sting. _I want to touch your_ **_real_ ** _body_ , she insists, blinking back frustration.

Her thumbs rake over her nipples and she leans into her touch, feeling his contented purr at the opposite end of their connection, however fragile and tenuous it may be. She takes control, sensing the phantom of his hands under hers, a shadow moving with her movements, twisting gently, coaxing the sensitive flesh to a hardened peak and then pinching. She moans, throwing her head back under the falling water and letting it rain into her mouth, wetting her tongue. Swallowing, she releases another shivering breath.

 _‘I remember finding you.’_ he murmurs as her hands journey down her abdomen to the smooth jut of her hips. _‘I remember that Snoke wanted you, but I couldn’t let him have you.’_ Her nails rake down her thighs, agonizingly slow, then up. _‘From the moment I saw you, I couldn’t…’_

 _This is so unfair._ She pouts.

His shadow tickles at her inner thighs, luring her fingers to the smooth slick she knows will be there. _‘I wish I could remember how you taste.’_ he groans.

And an idea suddenly occurs to her, a novel and rather salacious idea. Kylo’s shadow trembles, an inhale of surprise rippling over their bond as he reads her intention, but she’s already moving, index finger gliding between the folds of her sex and coating the digit in her arousal. She brings it up to her mouth, intent, sure of what she wants to do, yet hesitates, lashes fluttering.

_Rey!_

Her name scrapes along the nebulous threads of their connection, guttural, raw. He sounds positively unhinged.

Need throbs out from her core through her limbs, turning her bones to rubber and she sinks against the shower wall. Then, before she can go back on her decision, she closes the finger in her mouth, letting her tongue swish thoroughly around it. Kylo hisses like a feral beast and she feels him canting his hips forward, body opposing tight restraints, muscles in his arms bulging, jaws clamped so tight his teeth might shatter. Rey closes her eyes, assessing her own taste. It’s soft, musky, not quite delicate though gossamer at the edges, like a breath of night wind in hot summer.

Kylo’s audible whimper makes her toes curl and she sucks the rest of her arousal off her finger, dropping the hand to her side with a smirk. He wants to touch himself so badly and she wants him to as well, _needs_ him to. If only she could feel him running his hands over his cock, feel that vulnerable shiver as he works his blood into a frenzy of carnal madness.

But he can’t.

Anger stirs in her veins, building like a storm. Wherever Kylo is, he’s imprisoned, muzzled like a wild animal— _and that’s precisely what we are._ Wild. Animal. _Alien._ She grits her teeth, wanting to tear into his captors, rip them limb from limb… and maybe even dance over their sorry corpses. This thirst for violence would have frightened her months ago, but not anymore.

 _‘That’s my girl.’_ Kylo huffs, his voice thick with desire. _‘My savage girl. The things I will do to you.’_

Her body vibrates in excitement and she presses harder against the tile wall, wishing the solid barrier to be him, not cool but burning up, hot with sexual fever; not inanimate linoleum but living flesh, powerful muscles. Hers for the taking.

He’s coaxing her hands again, slipping them between her thighs and she growls, wrenching back control. _You will wait._

A pause.

_‘Rey.’_

The steel warning in his tone is enough to make her aching nipples scream desperately for more attention, but she maintains control, smiling coyly. _You. Will. Wait._

A shadow touch grazes over her cheeks, tracing the shape of her mouth. ‘ _I could take over your body again.’_

“Careful,” Rey croons aloud, running her hands lazily over said body. _That door swings both ways._

 _‘Yes.’_ He sounds as if this arouses him most of all.

She closes her eyes, slipping back under the warm water, letting it pelt over her shoulders as she presses two fingers to the bud of her sex, slow as she circles, once, twice, pausing, then reversing the movement. Her legs quiver and jerk, Kylo’s voice at her ear, panting.  

_‘Faster.’_

_No!_ She snaps.

His teeth grind.

She relishes it, savoring every nuance of his eager frustration and she feels as if she should punish him simply _because_ , but something tells her he would enjoy that too much.

 _‘Minx.’_ he half growls, half chuckles.

Rey doesn’t deny this, leaning her head back against the wall and spreading the slick between her legs, smoothing over the responsive flesh of her clit and trembling. She feels bold, powerful… dangerous. This darkness in her has always been there, she realizes, eyes rolling back, tongue running over her teeth. It has fed her dreams, promised of the anger that now scorches her veins, summoned that not-quite-there, absolutely present hunger which makes her bones vibrate with wrath. It has kept her _alive_.

She inserts one finger, curling it, tapping her G-spot until a small, desperate moan escapes her lips and then she’s inserting another, twirling them fully along her walls. A second moan fills the air, this one deeper, earthier and Kylo is invading her senses completely, washing over her—through her—like a rising tide.

And it’s _his_ hand cupping her sex, his phantom shadow stimulating her to the point of sheer insanity. She teeters, legs wobbly as if on the edge of a knife. Precarious. Her heart hammers behind her ribs, a violent, greedy thing seeking to leap from her throat and fly.

The wet skin of her back slides along the shower wall and she nearly loses balance as she— _he_ —hits a perfect rhythm of touch, making her body spasm uncontrollably. She holds on, unable to do anything else with the peak of her climax fast approaching.

Her instincts draw her back to the memory of Kylo between her legs, how his tail had wreathed around her body like armor, how his deadly teeth had pressed so perfectly into the bud of her cunt, making her nerves short circuit and her mind white out in obscene pleasure.

 _‘My queen,’_ he purrs. Rey swears she can feel his body all around her, lips hot on her cheek, dampening her skin with his breath while the words resonate deep into her bones, wrecking her soul.

And she’s _gone_.

Her feet slip out from under her as the orgasm hits and she slides down the wall, gripping feebly and barely saving her tail bone from the descent. The jolt of the fall seems to enhance the aftershock of contractions and she cries out, melting onto the floor with legs sprawled and water cascading over her face. It thrums through her veins for several long, wonderful minutes before her breathing steadies and she shakily climbs to her feet.

But the satisfaction feels hollow, because... “What about you?” she asks aloud.

 _‘Soon.’_ he murmurs huskily.

Accepting this unfortunate reality for now, Rey nods. “Soon.”

 

x

. x .

x

 

It’s been three days in this subterranean labyrinth, three days of reassessing everything she was so sure she knew about herself, about the First Order, about the dome. The jaded edge of bitterness that comes with these revelations is the most unwelcome sensation of all, if not the most persistent.

She tugs the new jacket she wears closer to her body. Well, it isn’t new per se, but it’s new to her. Kaydel had been given to her— _for the cold_ , she’d said. Rey sniffs at it inconspicuously, picking up the familiar scent of her friend’s hair. One small comfort in the middle of this hellish reality, she supposes.

So the Resistance has survived two centuries in the underground, with this latter century seeing the end of all domes save one. _Hosnian._ The citizens hadn’t even been aware of the real war raging around them, or maybe they had. Maybe, they just chose to ignore it, because ignoring everything around you is the chief facet of a fellow citizen. Rey scoffs.

 _What’s happening above ground_ , she wonders. Is Plutt ripping apart Jakku Sector for her? Has her name and face now been broadcast across the dome as a reviled dissenter?

_Likely._

Rey also wonders what the Regent thinks now that she has vanished. He probably isn’t surprised, not with the bizarreness of their conversation that day, how elusive and cryptic his statements had been. A part of her wonders if he’s even worried over the matter.

“I don’t agree with Poe’s plan. It’s foolish and overly ambitious.” Rose opines from beside her, a few paces closer than yesterday, at least.

“I know.” Kaydel sighs from Rey’s opposite side, her shoulder brushing Rey’s as she tosses a crooked strip of metal she’d been toying with into the chasm below. “But it’s not like we have a lot of options.”

Rose doesn’t reply.

Rey taps her fingers along the steel railing of the catwalk the three of them currently lean on. It’s amazing how things can grow. A literal underground metropolis, however rudimentary, right beneath the Regent’s nose and no one had been the wiser.

“Whatever happens tomorrow night, everything is going to change.” Rose whispers.

Kaydel nods.

“You’re so sure of that?” Rey challenges.

“Yes.” Rose answers, directing those piercing eyes at her.

Rey holds her gaze. “Why?”

Rose smirks. “Because of you.”

Out of all the new faces Rey has encountered, she respects Rose the most. Direct and brutally honest, suspicious and callous, the exact traits Rey is looking for right, because right now, all she wants is the truth.

“Finn stopped you before you could finish.” Rey shifts the conversation, her expression intent. “Finish it.”

Rose instantly knows what she’s referencing to: the argument between both her and Finn before Rey had fainted, the outburst about Rey being a clone, an empty body for—

“You’re not human, but I’m sure Poe explained all of that to you already.” Rose deadpans, the sarcastic distrust sharpening her words to a point.

“Rose don’t.” Kaydel grates out, mouth pressed into a thin line.

Of course Poe had. He’d also explained how her previous life had seen her fight in a war that had not been her own, how she’d lost friends, loved ones; how she’d become infected with a queen of the alien species Snoke was trying so desperately to study and control. How, after everything, she had still failed.

And worst of all? Snoke has been keeping himself alive for over two centuries by the blood of her beloved, like some kind of ancient decrepit vampire in his ugly black tower.

“She needs to hear this, Kay.”

Kaydel looks to Rey uneasily, but Rey’s sole focus is on Rose.

“What no one has told you is that about thirty years ago Kylo Ren escaped from Hosnian. The only way Snoke knew to lure him back was you.” She pauses, studying Rey, though her own expression betrays nothing and she starts again. “The first clones were utter failures, but something happened that Snoke hadn’t expected. The clones somehow gestated Xenomorph embryos.”

Rey knows the name and the species, at least through second-hand information from Poe. That and the ship’s log, the _Millenium Falcon_ it was called. But they’re only pieces of her past—not her but _her_ , this other self all of them seem to believe she may be—coming more into focus. At least, she hopes so, anyway.

 _Those aren’t your memories_ , the alien in her blood hums. _They’re ours, hers and mine._

Dull pain thumps cruelly in Rey’s chest, though she scorns it. _I’m a part of you both,_ she spits.

 _Do you think it’s you he desires… or_ me _?_

A poisoned snake of panic coils in her gut, tangling her innards into a nasty ball and she instinctively averts her gaze from Rose, desperate to hide the traitorous sheen there. Likely too late. She swallows back bile and hastily realigns their attention back on the subject of conversation. “There are six of them, these Xenomorphs.”

This Rey knows for a fact. She recalls the hazy image of a throne room, the rumble of a conversation between the terrifying old man with arctic eyes and another. They’d proceeded through a wall to a darker, hidden chamber, then deeper out of her sight. Where had they gone? Fear tickles at her nerve-endings and she suddenly remembers a distinct whispering from the memory, a plea.

_‘Mother. Mother?’_

“That’s right.” Rose agrees, her shrewd glare absorbing every nuance of Rey’s shifting expression.

Rey steadies herself, willing the chaos of her mind to ebb, if only a fraction, as she speaks the next words with absolute certainty. “You called me a clone, but I’m not an exact clone. I was _born_.”

“From what our source has told us, yes.” Kaydel whispers, her tone heavy. “Directly cloning you hadn’t worked, so the scientist heading the project tried reconstructing a human embryo with your DNA. It was a success. You were born KOR-GENESIS 7.”

Rey loses herself in the silence, at the mercy of the unrelenting storm inside her. _Snoke couldn’t produce a queen from the Xenomorph embryos of my previous clones, so he made me_ . A chill creeps up her spine. _I am the queen. My purpose wasn’t only to lure Kylo back but to..._

Kylo’s smoky purr returns to her senses all at once and she closes her eyes, turning away to the chasm as she feels the ghostly remnants of his phantom teasing her inner thighs. She breathes slowly through her nose, in and out, in and out.

 _Do you think it’s you he desires… or_ me _?_ The echo taunts her.

And another, the voice of a man—a scientist she somehow knows. _‘The female carries the genetics of her species. She is key to its existence.’_

“What’s wrong?” Kaydel asks.

Rey turns back to them, a shadow eclipsing her face. “You know I can hear your heartbeats?”

Both women go rigid.

She smiles, feeling so very… _volatile_ . “I’m not the Rey from before, I’m no longer the Rey from now and I’m not human, but I’m not one of _them_ , either.” She tilts her head, a wolf surveying two lambs. “I can smell you, too. I can smell that one of you is menstruating and the other is pregnant.”

Rose’s face goes slack in utter disbelief.

“You didn’t know, did you?” Rey asks mockingly.

She should feel ashamed for making such a jarring declaration, but she doesn’t. And it’s the truth at any rate. What does pull at her heart, though, is the look of hidden pain in Kaydel’s eyes.

 

 

x

. x .

x

 

Dreams chase her out of bed and up into the vacant tunnels. She avoids patrols easy enough, slipping from shadow to shadow as she navigates her way past the mess hall, behind the collapsed subway tunnels that once ran trains between the domes and through various barricades to her destination. She pauses for a moment, looking over her shoulder into the permeating gloom.

_Who am I now…?_

The underground groans restlessly as if suffering its own plague of nightmares.

 _I’m_ me _. None of this changes anything._

 _Maybe it does, maybe it doesn’t._ The alien in her muses.

Kylo’s distant whisper caresses at her senses, but she gently pushes him away. _Not tonight,_ she thinks to herself. _I need… time._

Her destination is a large abandoned chamber that had once been part of the sewage purification process for the dome, but has since been fashioned into Resistance HQ. Packed wall to wall with tech equipment, the room is a calming hum of holo-projectors, communication boards, hacker boxes, camera surveillance screens and out-of-date hard drives stored with every Resistance transmission emitted since their inception. EMP shielding mesh and copper wire span the walls and ceiling, giving the room a moderately oppressive air.

Rey sits at one of the computers, flipping it on and murmuring the passcode. The holo comes alive with blue light, bathing the room in an ocean glow as she scrolls through the listed ships until she finds the one she’s looking for.

 

 **> > MILLENNIUM FALCON / DECOMMISSIONED / LAST KNOWN CAPTAIN: REY** **SOLVEIG < <**

 

> **[Standard Year: 2121 / Earth Month: December / Day: 12]**
> 
> Successfully detained a knight of Ren, Pollux Ren. Knight died during interrogation before any real information could be gleaned. Currently pursuing Castor Ren to Titan.

 

Rey recalls that day all too clearly. Pollux Ren hadn’t just died, she’d been tortured to death by Rey’s _own_ hands. Rey wouldn’t have thought herself capable of such carnage, but war has a strange effect on people, especially at the loss of those they love.

This path of thought leads her to the night after her interaction with Kylo in the shower. She’d dreamed of Han Solo’s death and woken in a fit of sobs with only seconds to realize she was already vomiting over her cot onto the floor. Her body hadn’t stopped convulsing until she was dry heaving blood.

Kylo had murdered his own father.

She’d hated him then, and long years after. _A part of her hates him now._

 _Hatred and love exist as sun and moon to the heart of you humans._ The alien in her cooes. _You’ve never been innocent._

She scrolls ahead.

 

> **[Standard Year: 2122 / Earth Month: July / Day: 7]**
> 
> Castor Ren had been detained for questioning, but the ship was attacked by First Order TIEs and the knight escaped. Two of our crew have perished and the captain’s second in command, Chewie Suotamo, is in critical condition. En route to the Lady Luck and Colonel Lando Calrissian.
> 
>  

It strikes her how sterile her past self is in these logs, how emotionless. She keeps scrolling. 

 

> **[Standard Year: 2123 / Earth Month: March / Day: 15]**
> 
> Only two knights remain to Snoke’s Master of Ren. The Millennium Falcon currently rides the rings of Neptune in search of Janus Ren’s ship, Asterion, and the head scientist who knows the location Snoke’s head experiment facility, Daedelus.
> 
> _We’re so close, Leia._   

 

Rey reads the first signs of humanity from this Rey Solveig and she feels it puncture through her heart like a slow, vengeful blade, the ache of missing Leia, of missing home, the loneliness of always chasing, killing, chasing… killing. Round and round in circles.

She skips several entries to the last.

 

> **[Standard Year: 2124 / Earth Month: October / Day: 31]**
> 
> _This may be my final entry and likely this ship’s last mission. If anyone should find this message, send word to General Leia Organa that her son has returned and that I’m sorry I can’t bring him home._
> 
> _We’re heading for Snoke and we’re going to put him down once and for all._
> 
> _Leia… we’d been wrong about him. If you read this, find comfort. Ben is alive._

 

Everything about the entry is personal, naked with emotion, and it wrenches through her chest, summoning bittersweet images of a quiet cockpit, a tall silhouette regarding her from the access tunnel, eerily beautiful eyes sharp in the gloom and features softened by an air of peace.

_He was his most beautiful in that moment._

Maybe it was because she’d really seen him for the first time then. Maybe it was because they’d just made love like enamored fools, savage and tender, with a hunger and a desperation that left her heart aching. Maybe it was the monster growing in her chest and the knowledge that she was about to die, or maybe it was simply how his face always seemed to hold an angelic awkwardness…

… even when he was her enemy and she’d hated him.

Rey feels the love, the fear and the uncertainty all curdling in her gut, and she closes her eyes, willing it away before opening them again. She scrolls several years back in the ship’s log to a time when a different captain piloted the Falcon. Rey Solveig had read this entry many a sleepless night, stretched out on her cot and hot tears stinging her eyes.

 

> **[Standard Year: 2103 / Earth Month: November / Day: 24]**
> 
> She isn’t talking to me again. It’s Ben’s birthday today, too. Thought I’d show him a thing or two about this old ship and how it’s gotten me out of more than a couple tight spots. He’s excited. Hope I don’t muck this up like usual.

 

“You know this room used to house pumps that drained flooding from the underground river,” a voice announces from the dark, causing Rey to jump.

She jerks her head in its direction and finds Finn materializing from the shadows. He attempts a well-meaning smile, but she finds it more a grimace, its corners all rough edges and wariness. His heartbeat should have been obvious to her as well, especially since he likely started tailing her from the mess hall, but her mind has been so preoccupied. She pointedly turns her attention back to the ship’s log and makes a show of ignoring him.

He continues despite her actions, though with far less familiarity, his tone guarded. “Turned out it was too much of a hassle to keep the subway tunnels dry and work with the constant underground tremors that strike this region, so they moved the trains above ground. Of course, that didn’t last long with the hellish sandstorms in the deeper desert.”

She purses her lips.

“What the archives don’t tell you is the real reason the subways were abolished.”

“Why?” she finally decides to take the bait.

“Snoke might have the sky, but we have the underground.”

“A maze of collapsed subway tunnels connecting all the domes.” Rey drawls, done with this window dressing of a conversation. She cuts to the chase, face hard. “When are you going to get to the point and tell me that Poe ordered you to follow me? That he wanted to make sure the monster didn’t stir up too much trouble.”

“How do you know Rose is pregnant?” Finn asks, seemingly unable to hold the question back any longer.

She grins. “No more idle conversation about history and the weather? Good. I was getting bored.”

He surprises her by pulling up a chair and taking a seat beside her. “This is idle conversation.”

Rey averts her glare to a very interesting crack in the wall.

Silence follows.

“I know Poe’s been difficult—”

“Does he send you to apologize for him as well?” Rey snipes, irritated.

“—but he’s honestly just worried about the people down here. Some people were born in this, like Poe.”

That gets Rey’s attention. “Poe is from… down here?”

“Yup. After his parents’ death, he relocated himself into the Jakku sector. It’s seems to be the easiest place to disappear.” Finn smirks at her. “Whoever hid you apparently realized that, too.”

“How could he relocate without access to the citizen data bank? It’s not like he could just make up a serial number.”

Finn leaned back in his chair. “His mom worked as one of the chiefs of the citizen data bank. She taught him all the tips and tricks.”

“So he’s always been Resistance even…”

“Yeah. Even when you knew him as the drunkard raving on and on about Luke Skywalker.”

 _Did he know what I was back then, too?_ She wonders.

Jakku is a place where one can disappear, it’s true, or be _reborn_ . She was reborn there, citizen 2514, but she had _chosen_ the name Rey. In many ways, she is still that girl from centuries before, a survivor and a fighter, a dogged member of the Resistance which had been led by a woman she’d come to call family. _Leia’s legacy still lives._

And so does her _son_.  

Regardless of how hurt or angry she is at Poe for his attitude towards her, she can understand his reasoning, if begrudgingly. Would she not do the same for Kaydel, for Kylo? Of course she would, she’d die for them. She’d _kill_ for them. “Tell me everything you know.”

Finn laughs, though there is no mirth in it. “It wasn’t even supposed to be this way, you know? I wasn’t—” he sighs, looking down at his nail-chewed fingertips. “I wasn’t supposed to defect, betray the First Order. I was a spy. I’d come back from offworld training with Snoke’s elite.”

Rey gapes at him. “Offworld?”

“Yeah, you dome dwellers have no idea of the war happening everywhere else but you Hosnian streets. Snoke has been building a separate army, one _he_ has sole control of. When I came back planetside it was actually to keep an eye on the Regent, but he must have realized this, because the next thing I knew I was being assigned to pose as a defector.”

 _That explains_ some _of Hux’s strange behavior._

“Rose made you truly defect.” Rey assumes.

“It wasn’t just her.” he smiles. “I found myself down here. Crazy place to find yourself, right?”

She can’t resist her own smile. “Not that crazy.”

An earnest flame flickers in his gaze. “Snoke is planning a full scale attack soon. I don’t know when, but we need to gain control of that tower and take away his power source.”

“Kylo.” she breathes.

“And you. There are rumors…” he pauses, expression troubled. “Apparently Snoke has discovered how to permanently infect himself with the monster’s unadulterated DNA using a virus. Up until now, he has only been able to withstand blood transfusions after the DNA had been synthesized, weakening the acidic compounds which would otherwise destroy his body.”

“I spoke to him, Kylo, last night. I... felt him.” She says quickly, blushing at the memory more than the admission before hastily moving onward. “But I don’t know where he was, or what was happening to him.”

“With Hux having moved him deeper into the Needle, there’s no telling where he is now.” Finn purses his lips, hesitant. “There’s a chance Snoke doesn’t know, either, which could be to our benefit. Do you think you can find him when we get you into the Needle?”

She answers honestly. “I’m not sure.”

“I think something massive is about to go down.” Finn’s hands twist and interlace in his lap. “The Regent has neglected to send certain reports on Resistance movements to the supreme leader.”

“Where is Snoke?”

“It’s anyone best guess. Only his trusted praetorian guards know and no one’s ever seen them, at least no one at my pay grade. They travel alone, I hear, and Snoke has five or more with him at all times. Troops tells macabre tales about their brutality. I’ve heard Snoke hand picks these guards based on their lack of empathy. I’ve even heard the only way to become a praetorian is to kill the person your closest to.”

A memory suddenly flashes in her mind’s eye of that decrepit face, those cold eyes, and a blur of red beside him, glistening red— _armor_. “I think I’ve seen them.” she murmurs.

When he doesn’t respond immediately, she glances in his direction. His brows have drawn low and his mouth has worried itself into a tight frown. “Your eyes are changing. They’re different than yesterday. They’re brighter.”

 

x

. x .

x

 

Forty-eight hours and still no sleep. Rey doubts anyone else among the Resistance has slept, either. They’d started just before sundown, a flow of bodies hustling through the tunnels as quiet as mice with weapons at their hips and in their hands, faces stony with anticipation. She and Poe had left last, hurrying through a series of narrow service corridors to the Kor Vella Sector, their closest entry point to reach the Supremacy Sector. Then, the Black Needle.

The plan is simple enough, Finn and his troops will attack and disable the dome’s power plant in the Mos Eisley, while Rose and her forces attack the backup power station in Varykino. Kaydel and her unit have already made their way to the Black Needle’s central gate in preparation for First Order reinforcements.

“How much longer are we going to wait here?” Rey demands, agitation heightening her senses. She can practically smell the electricity in the air.

“He’ll show up soon. Don’t worry.” Poe waves his hand, not taking his eyes off the bright glow of the power plant three sectors away.

“Who is _he_ , exactly?”

She catches a smirk at the corner of Poe’s mouth. “You’ve met him.”

Rey arches an eyebrow. “What’s his name?”

“BB-8.” a soft timbre utters from behind her.

She startles and glances around to find the familiar little AutoReiv from her mental health screening some weeks ago. “You.” The word leaves her in a soft rush and she quickly snaps her mouth back shut.

“It’s about time you showed up, buddy. Finn’s running late, too.” Poe sounds only mildly amused.

BB-8 rolls up to them, his glowing lights illuminating a warm pool of color beneath him and a touch of guilt apparent in his sloped posture. Rey studies the android, idly staring into his human-like face, when a flurry of realizations hit her. “He’s your entourage,” she blurts out, glancing back at Poe. “ _You_ had this AutoReiv at my mental health screening.” Her tone bears a heavy hint of accusation. “What the fuck do you want from me? You’ve been watching me all this time and now you’re telling me you need my help? What exactly do you expect to happen _after_ I help you?”

Poe’s face is a dim blue smear in the shadows and he doesn’t respond at once, his hazy expression rigid, blank. “I’m not worried about the after. All I care about is killing Snoke.”

“And the Regent?”

“That snake deserves an even more painful death.” Poe nearly spits.

Rey scrutinizes him. “And Kylo? Me? What about us?”

“You and the monster aren’t on my kill list. Satisfied?”

She bites back a snarl. “Hardly.”

“That makes two of us.”

The silence that weighs on them unnerves Rey and she plunges deeper, needing an answer. “Do I really look so different to you, Poe? Am I so changed that...” she trails off.

He doesn’t reply at first and she’s sure he won’t when a heavy sigh abruptly leaves his lips. “No.” The murmur is almost inaudible.

She lets it settle in the air around them before continuing, a lump in her throat. “All I want is to just understand— _everything_ —to know my place in all this.”

Poe chuckles, a sorrowful sound. “The only thing you need to understand about any of this is that people will do whatever it takes to survive.”

The lights of the power plant suddenly flicker, flash, then go out completely. Lights of the backup power station soon follow, dimming like a candle in the wind and snuffing out. Machine’s choke and go quiet, and the overhead sky shimmers, goes black. Rey’s heart hastens in her chest and she feels the sense of dread that follows with the darkness.

“That’s our cue.” Poe jumps to his feet. “Let’s move!”

The trio race through the straight, geometrical streets of the Supremacy sector, circling around the imposing black tower to a service exit. BB-8 works swiftly, bypassing the manual code lock and ushering them inside. They hurry through the vacant halls, Rey mildly unsettled by the building’s emptiness before she is shoved through another doorway. Faint red emergency lights line the floor and ceiling, defining an endless count of stairs both up and down.

“Well, we would have had a much easier time using the elevator.” Poe huffs from beside her. “BB-8 scout ahead.”

“We’ve got exactly eleven minutes and forty-three seconds before the power plant’s system reboots.” he whispers. “After that, First Order troops will have the ability of communications and Kaydel’s unit—”

“I’m well aware of that, buddy, so let’s get ahead of ‘em.” Poe interrupts, then looks to Rey, voice deepening. “Find him.”

She nods and walks in front of him, a wild knot in her stomach. BB-8 rolls unsteadily down the steps beside her as she reaches out with her mind, seeking that familiar sharp edge in the ether. The sink lower, round and round and round until Rey is certain they’ve reached the earth’s very center.

And the steps end. The emergency lights trail ahead, coiling and disappearing down what must be a wide bending corridor. She follows, Poe on her heels and BB-8 several paces out before them, his orange glow revealing a finely patterned marble floor, but not black as she would have expected. Perhaps gray, or white.

 _Sterile_ , her mind muses.  

“What do you feel?” Poe asks.

“He’s close.” she says, heart quickening. “But he’s… unconscious.”

“Eight minutes and thirteen seconds.” BB-8 whispers back to them.

Rey forces her awareness farther, sensing a large room, a recessed floor with a sizable object at its center, liquid, the steady beat of a heart monitor—

 _‘Mother. Mother?’_ a voice hitches.

She stumbles, every muscle in her body freezing.

 _‘I can sense her!’_ another exclaims.

_‘She’s here! Mother has come back!’_

The voices are raw and childlike, but there lies a hidden fury in them, a fury she understands explicitly. And they called her _mother_.

“Rey. What’s wrong?” Poe grabs her shoulder, jarring her back to the present.

“I…”

“We don’t have much time. You need to find him.”

Rey gathers herself, shaking the eerie sense of being splintered from her mind and seeks out Kylo’s signature. She discovers it again, strong and insistent as it echoes through her veins like a song and she rushes forward, suddenly needing to be near him, desperate to be near him.

“Rey wait!” Poe shouts.

She doesn’t hear him, she doesn’t even see BB-8 as she rushes past, arms pumping at her sides and footfalls solid against the floor. Air whistles between her teeth as she grits her jaw, blindly following that curious thread. _Closer, closer._

_‘Rey…’_

“Kylo!” she pants.

A loud noise erupts from behind and she whirls, seeing the hurrying feet of Poe disappear from view as a shutter slams shut, separating them.

“Rey!” he hollers, though the reinforced steel muffles his voice. “Rey! Talk to me!”

She lingers a moment, contemplating, then turns on her heel and continues on.

 

x

. x .

x

 

Time seems an immaterial thing as she walks the darkened halls, various doors opening and closing for her as if leading her directly to her purpose, her _raison d'etre_. The emergency lights dim and flicker, as Kylo’s signature grows, nearly overpowering now.

_‘Rey.’_

She cuts down a short corridor, up a set of steps and breaks left into a large room. Entering it sends the emergency lights into a flickering panic and she looks around, studying the environment. The room is wide, easily the size of Jakku’s main square, rectangular in shape and lined with advanced computer hardware. At its middle, the floor dips down another set of steps to a circular pit and there, nestled in its navel, is Kylo Ren.

The flickering of the lights stop abruptly, easing into a soft, visceral glow and Rey creeps forward, mouth gone completely dry. Kylo’s cylindrical prison extends several feet into the air, a mass of hoses and electrical wires tangled above it all the way to the ceiling like a poisonous web. The red lights lining the floor of the pit create a geometric series of octagons, each one smaller than the other as they reach the tank. These lights brighten around him, seemingly calling her closer and she obeys, feet shuffling, hands furled into fists.

 _I’m here_ , she thinks. _I’m finally here._

Her eyes travel along the broad body floating in the tank’s liquid, a cumbersome breathing apparatus attached to his face, tubing hooked all down his arms, his sides, his sex exposed and his legs curled as if in a semi fetal position. Ugly scarring, many she knows to be battle wounds, decorate his flesh, but the others—her stomach churns. They are surgical, precise. Walking around the tank, she notes one key deficiency about this Kylo Ren that the one in her memories did not lack.

 _They’ve removed his tail._ Her heart twists painfully. _No. No!_

Rage stirs in her chest, scalding her insides and she looks back up into her beloved’s face, finding his eyes open, trained upon her with a voracity she experiences as a serpentine warmth moving down her spine.

“Kylo.” she breathes.

He raises an arm, tightens his hand into a fist and pummels it forward. The low _thunk_ of sound vibrates the air around her. He does it again and again, and again. A cloud of blood surrounds each impact and she watches in agonized fascination as minor fissures begin to form, spreading lazily outward and deepening. The vicious ache of his attack ghosts through her own knuckles, causing her to bite back a groan and cradle her hand.

At last, a real crack splits through the glass, echoing into the silence like a bone breaking and Rey starts, lurching backwards into the rough edge of a desk. Another follows. Liquid begins weeping down the transparent surface, glinting pink, and Rey stares enrapt as Kylo deals one final blow.

The cylinder bursts, shards of glass spilling forth and Kylo tumbling forward into the shimmery mess of liquid. The vampiric attachments of tubing rip away, though not without their pound of flesh, and his chin connects to the floor. Rey stands frozen, unable to process the scene before her. This mirage, this _man_ she has dreamed of for much longer than perhaps she realizes is huddled in front her, body trembling and heart pounding in her ears.

She inhales—

—and his head jerks up, all the shivery awkwardness of his body dissipating in a millisecond. He’s on his feet at once, striding toward her with wild black hair and rolling muscles, mouth pressed into that familiar pout as he swallows; hands clenching, unclenching.

Rey blinks, dazed when he captures her, hoisting her up onto the table behind them and slanting his mouth over hers in a savage taking. She answers back, opening her lips and swiping her tongue along his teeth, gasping at their sharpness and his taste… so purely animal.

“I’ve waited so long for you.” he groans as he pulls away, planting slow deliberate kisses from her neck to her collarbone.

Her lust momentarily sours as she recalls the _other’s_ words. _Do you think it’s you he desires… or_ me _?_ It terrifies her not to know.

_But you chose your name. You chose Rey._

_Even if I did, am I entitled to that name? Am I her? Am I…?_

Kylo’s distracting hands skim under her top, fumbling momentarily with her belt before opting to rip it off entirely. Her blouse suffers the same treatment moments later and he plunges onto her breasts, purring into her skin as she arches for his touch. The shadows dance over the slopes and planes of his back hypnotically while she clings to him, burying her hands in his hair and curling her body protectively around him.

_You’re whoever you choose to be._

And that alien other: _We take what we want and make it our own._

 _Then, I take what’s yours_ , Rey snarls. _I take it and make it mine!_

Before Kylo can utter a word of surprise, Rey has pivoted herself and kicked his legs out from under him, knocking him to the floor and pinning him down. “You’re mine.” she rasps. “I don’t care if I’m not her. You’re mine!”

He stares up at her, the carnal sheen of his gaze eclipsed by realization and he says, so very softly, “We all began as something else.” A hand comes up to cradle her cheek and she stifles a unexpected sob. “But I have always belonged to you. That will never change.”

The words swell in her heart and she bows forward, pressing her forehead against the crook of his neck, her nails biting desperately into his skin. The words are heaven from his mouth, everything she’s ever wanted—ever _needed_ —to hear and the last broken piece of armor shielding her soul falls away.

Pushing herself up, she holds his gaze, eyes purposeful as she slides along his body until she’s straddling his hips and he releases an excited hiss at the sting of her nails dragging down his chest. Lifting up to her knees, she drops her trousers to her thighs and keeps her focus on Kylo’s expression as he cranes his head to witness the smooth hot slick dripping from her cunt. His tongue darts unconsciously over his lips and she smiles, unable to contain the bolt of pleasure that strikes up her spine. Her toes curl as more slick gathers down her legs and his hands journey up her pants, hungry to touch, but she quickly bats them away.

His expression darkens.

She’s had him this way before, flushed and vengeful with need. _Perfect._ How many times? Too many. Even when they were enemies, she suspects, even then. Maybe once, maybe twice...  

Rey’s smile breaks into a grin and she slips one hand down her exposed chest, over the frays of her ruined shirt and along her inner thighs, catching the wetness and smearing it up her folds. His large hands grip into the fabric of her pants, a ferocious growl bubbling at the back of his throat and she tortures him further as she traces a languid circle over the bud of her sex, making her hips cant forward.

His grip tightens, teeth grinding.

“Good boy.” she purrs, the latter word drawing into a moan as she slips two fingers inside her.

“Are you sure?” he challenges, hands balling into fists, _trembling_.

In the dim glow of amaranth she can see his pupils blown wide and the eager twitch of his cock, aching and hard below her. Rey bites her lip, removing her two fingers and bringing the hand slowly to his mouth, seeming as if she might let him taste her. Kylo leans forward eagerly, but before he can capture those fingers she draws away and gets to her feet. Despite his obvious frustration, he remains on his back, watching with predatory eyes as she steps aside and wriggles the rest of the way out of her pants, discarding all her clothing on the floor.

He’s nearly where she wants him. She can see the patience dwindling down in his glare like the pitiful wick of a candle. _Good._ “I like you when your angry.” she opines.

Kylo slowly rises to his feet, lush mouth pressed into a determined line, fingers flexing. Rey knows what she’s tempting by doing this and she walks fearlessly up to him, allowing herself a long generous look from his feet to his eyes. He reaches out, skimming his hand over her arm, tracing her shoulder blade as he pulls her close, gliding his other hand to her ass and squeezing _hard_ , making damn sure to leave a bruise. She whimpers, pressing her body into his and feeling the solid weight of his cock against her inner thigh.

“I wonder if you could behave so well with me teasing you.” he muses.

“I’m not as well trained as you.” she quips.

Kylo hums thoughtfully, then abruptly yanks her forward, eyes flashing as she yelps at the sudden collusion of their hips, her tongue working over her teeth as she relishes the slick glide of his cock between her legs, teasing her folds. It’s enough to render her knees weak and she grips at him to keep herself up right.

Leaning close to her ear, he utters, “Your so cruel, Rey.”

 _Always_ , her mind whispers as she wraps her arms around him, begging him to hoist her up again, to slam her against the wall and take what is his. Her core pulses painfully and her thighs clench around his wandering hands as she stretches up onto her toes, urging his fingers closer to that welcoming heat between her legs. He obliges, slipping one thick digit through her folds, making her squirm; then, all at once they are moving, propelling backwards at a dizzying speed.

She exhales roughly as her body connects with something solid. Maybe the table from earlier, maybe a wall. It doesn’t matter. They wrestle against each other for dominance, Kylo’s powerful hands spreading her legs wide, opening her up as she bites at him, leaving fresh bruises down his neck. He pins one of her shoulders back and looms over her, using his other hand to tease her clit. She writhes frantically, unable to withhold the loud moan that escapes her lips.   

“Should I be cruel, Rey?” he asks, eyes dancing.

Her mouth quivers, tongue dabbing her lower lip. “I—n—no—please.”  

Kylo watches her intently as he caresses the tip of his cock against her sex, drawing close enough for their chests to touch and dipping lightly into her entrance… then, pulling away. She relinquishes a sound somewhere between a frustrated sob and a feral snarl, though Kylo holds her fast, his weight pressed securely over her body and leaving her no other option but to lock her legs around him.  

“I should be cruel…” he trails off against her cheek as he prepares himself, taking hold of his cock and using his other hand to angle her hips.

Rey clings to him, stealing a deep breath and curling her fingers tight into his hair as he carefully glides into her. Her stomach muscles tense, at first, and her vaginal walls strain at the intrusion, but she exhales slowly, focusing on the pain and willing it to subside. Slowly, deeper and deeper, until finally she feels him buried to the hilt and he exhales a shivering breath.

The two remain still for several long moments, Kylo staring down at her with an indefinable expression and Rey twining her fingers fondly through his hair, the air around them potent, _alive_. Then, he draws back and pushes in, slow, deliberate. They sigh contentedly at the sensation and she leans up, brushing her nose against his to urge him on.

He obeys, pumping in deeper, harder, driving the head of his cock as far as their bodies will allow and she tightens her hold around him, rotating her hips in a way that makes him groan and he suddenly yanks her hips into him. Both cry out with surprise and Rey digs the back of her skull into the unforgiving table top, not caring about the pain.

The greed that creeps through her is staggering. It breaks out over her skin like an electric charge and she gouges her nails viciously into Kylo’s flesh, drawing nasty red marks down his spine. He tosses his head back, grunting enthusiastically and swooping down upon her chest, lavishing her breasts as he drives into her, those sharp teeth making her nerve-endings sing. She continues clawing at him, needing him deeper, _faster_.

He heeds her call, slamming into her hips and making the table beneath her vibrate uncontrollably. Rey writhes, turning her head to the side and biting a scream into her arm as he spares a hand to circle the sweet bundle of nerves at the apex of her thighs. Her hands scramble over him, desiring to pull him down into a heated kiss, but she’s too far gone, her mind a muddled chorus of _so close, so close_.

And all at once, the spell in the room breaks as a door hisses open somewhere behind them.

Rey startles, her heart leaping out of her chest and Kylo immediately forms a protective barrier around her, glare frantic and teeth bared. Both look in the direction of the sound and find a pair of glowing eyes approaching them. From the the gloom, an unknown AutoReiv materializes, an entourage model, one that is undoubtedly a custom series. _Very_ custom. Rey stares in speechless horror at the android while Kylo maneuvers his body, preparing to pounce.

“Aggression is unnecessary.” the AutoReiv says smoothly. “I am Phasma, entourage of Armitage Hux, Regent of the Hosnian Dome. He has requested that I aid you in disposing of Supreme Leader Snoke.”

Kylo and Rey gape at one another.

“We don’t have much time.” the entourage asserts in annoyance. “Snoke knows you have found one another and he will have already assembled some of his praetorian guards to apprehend you. We need to move.”

Rey stares at the tall, lithe build of the machine, at her glinting armor, her powerful face structure. It’s unsurprising that Hux designed this AutoReiv’s appearance to command respect… and here she is naked, in the midst of rather _loud_ lovemaking. Her insides lurch with embarrassment and she covers her chest, glancing up at Kylo. He shifts from her face to Phasma’s, hatred kindling in his eyes, and carefully disengages himself from Rey.   

“I should rip that machine equivalent you call a heart right from you chest.” He remarks savagely, uncaring that he’s still hard, still covered in Rey’s slick with fresh bite marks darkening his collarbones and his hair a tangled mess.

“You two animals can get back to fucking later.” Phamsa throws the slur carelessly over her shoulder as she about faces. “We only have a small window of time to kill the Supreme Leader.”

 

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**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **PLEASE REMEMBER TO LEAVE ME SOME FEEDBACK!  
> ** **CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM IS WELCOME!**  
>  **ALSO, IF THERE ARE ANY ERRORS, PLEASE LET ME KNOW! I DIDN'T DO A THOROUGH GRAMMAR CHECK.**  
>    
> 
> 
> **Chapter References:**  
>  Rey's Surname [Solveig](https://www.behindthename.com/name/solveig) (pronounced sool-vay) - Swedish / Sun Strength  
> 


	4. Part IV: Child of Sorrow

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **A/N:** So I've decided to divide this final installment into two separate parts for the sake of flow, which will make this update a tad shorter than what we're used to. I'm just terrible about embellishing the plot and some shocking ideas sprung upon me one evening while taking a jaunt under the darkening sky, and I _couldn't_ resist. The last update for this story shouldn't take too long, so be on the lookout. 
> 
> Also, a massive, MASSIVE thank you to my close friend, Midnight, who beta'd this installment.
> 
>  **MUSIC LIST:**[Godhead Emanation - Metatron Omega](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lXBLtSIOs5A) (the lab ambiance) and the entire playlist of Metatron Omega's [Gnosis Dei](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=inny0Le-IKI&index=1&list=PL99czue-ivEuLkeGngyVc__zbOkAw9ap8) honestly, 
> 
> **CHAPTER WARNINGS:**  
>  \- This isn't so much a warning as much as a head's up. I switch the POV at the end of this installment to Finn's for a short while, so we get a clearer picture on how others view both Rey and Kylo Ren as well as the on-going battle. The next and final installment will be all Rey, so no need to worry.
> 
> \- Gore Descriptions / Death / Physical Torture
> 
> \- Mental Manipulation / Psychological Torture
> 
> \- Secondary Character Deaths / Minor Character Deaths
> 
> \- This chapter is very, **very** difficult for Rey! Be warned!

**♚ ✶ PART IV MUSIC ✶ ♕**

 

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_"How faint, how loud the bravest hearts have cried."_

\- James Elroy Flecker

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x

. x . x .

 

_"Bless the child of nowhere,_

_For she is the harbinger of change,_

_The hellish maelstrom roused to action,_

_A Valkyrie of desert sands and sunless skies,_

_Our gruesome maiden bathed in the blood of stars._

 

_Bless the child of nowhere,_

_For she is the mother goddess of new worlds,_

_Our Matron saint of violent rebirth..._

_And dark possibilities."_

 

\- Unknown hymn retrieved from the First Order exploratory probe, Osiris VI -

/-/ Date of Retrieval: Approx. 150 Years Prior to Earth's Cataclysm /-/

 

. x . x .

x

 

A withered relic of a woman once told Rey that one’s moment of reckoning weighed the balances of the world, _world_ meaning the small existence of Jakku sector for the woman, but for Rey, well, perhaps something a little deeper, a little more vast... like a churning inky abyss. Like a pair of powerful arms and bewitching black eyes— _oceans of darkness_ —plush lips and sharp teeth.

 _“Our day of reckoning finds us.”_ The old mother had whispered. _“No matter where we run. The razor winds beyond the dome will never carry us fast enough.”_

She adjusts the collar of her new blouse, eyes conspicuously downcast from the bothersome AutoReiv’s empty gaze, as Kylo dons his own pair of essentials, his expression decidedly more combative. To be honest, she cannot make up her mind which is worse: being found in the throes of passion by this hawkish android, or this hawkish android watching with painstaking consideration as both her and Kylo dress themselves after said sexual escapade.

It should have already occurred to her how this development alters the game’s board and the players upon it. Hux must have known she’d arrive to find Kylo before even she did, which is, to say the least, violently unsettling. What does this say for the Resistance? Is he moving against them now? _And what of Kaydel?_ A chill runs through her heart.

“Come on.” Phasma drawls as Kylo slips on his shirt, hiding Rey’s fresh claw marks down his back.

Those won’t heal for a while. She made them, after all. Her toes curl and she bites her tongue at the memory of him, how he felt, the sound of skin against skin in the still cool of the lab, his embrace as she felt herself so close to splintering apart. _So close._

 _Later._ He agrees.

She jumps at the tender sound of his voice in her mind, her consciousness oddly raw, open to him in a way that it hadn’t been before. Rey looks up at him and his lips quirk ever-so-slightly.

_We’re bonded, now._

Warmth blooms in her chest at the word, every cell in her body seeming to sing and he takes her hand, elongated fingers entwining with her own as she grips them tight, fearful suddenly that he might disintegrate in front of her, nothing more than a hallucination.

Phasma leads them to an unassuming wall several bends down the corridor from the lab where she’d found Kylo and taps her knuckles in three distinct places along the geometric pattern. Neon lines flicker and brighten in the shape of a small rectangle where her hand rests—a retina scanner.

Phamsa then turns to Rey.

Rey blinks, confused.

The AutoReiv makes a sound suspiciously close to a growl. “You’re the only one aside from the Regent who can open this door.”

Her stomach goes cold. “What?”

“Step forward.” she commands brusquely.

Rey throws a fleeting glance at Kylo, something inside her flesh buzzing, building, and steps in front of Phasma, leaning into the scanner. Bluish-purple light flashes over her eyes and she squints at the momentary blindness before the wall groans and hisses to life, segmenting outward and folding back like a flower unwinding to the dawn. A narrow, short hallway reveals itself, leading to an even narrower set of elevator doors.

 _I’ve been here before._ Her mind whispers as she absorbs the predatory gleam of the sliding doors, abnormally bright in the dimness.

 _Yes…_ her other side purrs as her eyes find Kylo again.

He nods, simple, curt.

The wary knot in her gut releases slightly and she looks over to Phasma whose arms are folded over her chest, an expectant stiffness in the entourages posture. Rey licks her lips, feeling the agitating caress of memories not quite in her grasp, fuzzy images of a golden silhouette crouching to her face, murmuring—

_“Call to him, my child. Bring him home to me.”_

“The more time you waste, the less likely your chance of defeating the supreme leader.” Phasma’s terse declaration startles her.

Both Kylo and the AutoReiv are waiting down the narrow hall, the doors of the elevator now open and beckoning. Rey steals a wavering breath, looking into the cramped metal box with cloudy eyes, the rate of images and tumultuous voices magnifying, making it hard to hear anything outside of her own head.

For the first time, Rey is beginning to understand. Someone, an individual very important to this game, took her from Snoke and spirited her away to Jakku Sector, effectively concealing her under the alias, Citizen 2514… for this exact moment. Of that at least, she has no doubt. And if only she and the Regent can open the secret passage to this elevator, then Snoke has known all along, too.

There are only two people she knows who could accomplish this feat. One who has the power to rip her from Snoke’s iron grip, while the other has the tools to effectively mask her identity. A lump of dread forms in her throat. _Inconceivable. They couldn’t possibly…_

“Rey.” Kylo’s low voice draws her attention and she finds unease on his face, the first emotion she’s seen beyond fierce possessiveness or downright animal hatred and it frightens her.

Nevertheless, she walks forward, pausing by his side and glancing at the AutoReiv. In front of her, she notes the curious red line of neon light that follows the ceiling and ends at the very center of the elevator. Like a thread of yarn, she muses offhandedly.

“You won’t need weapons.” Phasma drawls.

“We will not be alone, either.” Kylo injects, his gaze hardened onyx as he stares down the entourage.

Rey’s heart leaps at his assertion. “The Resistance?” _Kaydel?_

Neither one of them answer.

Kylo’s mind is oddly silent. Is he blocking her?

Before she can consider it further, he ushers her forward and steps into the elevator, both of them turning back to face the AutoReiv with grim expressions. Anger prickles beneath Rey’s skin at the sudden and unexpected static from Kylo’s mind, but she quells it, deciding now is not the time.

Phasma halts the sliding doors before they close. “My master told me to remind you, GENESIS 7, of your raison d’etre.”

Rey feels her hackles rising and the words come out like acid. “And what _exactly_ is my raison d’etre?”

“The same for all fellow citizens of this dome. A commitment to the progress of the citizenry.”

The doors hiss shut, effectively severing Rey from any further elaboration and she bites down hard on her teeth, ignoring the very real tinge of discomfort that shoots from her jaw to her crown as Kylo’s hand has found hers again, his grip solid and just shy of painful.

“Tell me the truth, Kylo.” Rey intones, the fury under her skin boiling. “Who did this to me? Who erased my past and hid me in Jakku sector?” He opens his mouth to speak, but she abruptly cuts him off, nails biting into the skin of his hand. “Do not _lie_ to me?”

He takes a deep breath, his eyes fixed on the gleaming doors ahead of them. “I can only remember fragments, pieces. I know Hux was the one who set me free all those years ago. I know he did it to weaken Snoke.” A tendon along Kylo’s neck stands out as he grinds his teeth. “I remember the first time I heard you through the ether, the soft sounds you made. I couldn’t believe it. You were alive. And all at once, I didn’t care that it was a trap to draw me back. I just didn’t care.”

Rey watches him intently, breathing in the air surrounding them and finding it saturated, _heady_. Love is a deadly thing.

Kylo continues, his voice growing softer. “I was the one who walled off your true self, wrapped it up tight and sealed it away, so you would fit in like every other mundane citizen in this prison.” He lets out a serrated breath. “I just couldn’t believe you were real. I had to get you away from _him_.”

Her heart squeezes and she reaches up with her free hand, taking his jaw and angling his face down to her, eyes resolute. He meets her glare and she sees relief, gossamer and fragile within those swirling shadows. “We will finish this together.”

He tips his chin minutely in a nod.

“But…” her fingers clamp harshly into his skin, denting the hollows of his cheeks. “Never do such a thing without my consent again.”

He complies, his lips parting in that unique way he does, though she can hear the hesitation of his mind, his reasoning. _‘You were a child. I had to protect you.’_

Rey leans up on her toes, kissing his lips and dragging her tongue over the needle edges of his teeth. “Never again.” she murmurs, planting another chaste kiss at the corner of his mouth.

As she pulls back she finds a kindling defiance in his eyes, but before he can retort with any real fire, the doors drift open in front of them. Rey takes a steadying breath and looks ahead into the darkness, her hybrid eyes distinguishing four glinting red bodies in the gloom. _Praetorian guards._ They stand opposite one another in pairs, their stance rigid, weapons at rest.

Rey curses. _Not needing weapons my ass._

Deeper inside the chamber, she notes a wide sweeping set of stairs leading the the room’s center, low-hanging chandeliers—or what she assumes are chandeliers, aside from the bundle of cables and shackles—and the hazy outline of an ebony throne against a backdrop of vulgar red curtains. Kylo’s hand grasps hers so tight she’s sure he will snap bones as they begin, one foot before the other, hearts thundering in their chests, skin tingling with anticipation. The rhythm of their footfalls echo deafeningly back at them, but Snoke’s guardians never move, seem not even to breathe, and there’s more than four. As she and Kylo close in on the ghostly throne she counts eight total.

Kylo’s lips peel back into a tense grimace. _‘Snoke knows everything about us. We have no element of surprise over him.’_

“Well, well, well! The prodigal children have returned!” a guttural voice booms from the blackness. Rey’s spine goes ramrod stiff and she pulls Kylo to a halt, her eyes catching the vague haze of gold bleeding out from the gloom. “You’re finally home.” It continues, every syllable enunciated with a flagrant hint of hauteur. “I knew this day would pass.”

“The day of your death.” Kylo says brazenly.

The figure approaches them, stepping down from the throne as two guards take flank, their medieval weapons raised. The supreme leader’s face finally succumbs to a ribbon of light from a distant window and Rey is shocked by what she sees. The scarred, pale-skinned face she remembers is far more deformed now, with an elongated skull, raw open wounds and glittering canines enveloped by a pair of withering lips. The eyes make her skin crawl, yellowed and glassy, the irises almost colorless.

_He is a walking disease._

“Come to kill me?” Snoke muses. “So you have.” a meaty smile twists his mouth, a mouth overwhelmed, Rey realizes, by flaps of surgically modified skin.

What the hell has this monstrosity done to himself? Not only is he a walking disease, he’s falling to pieces. _Rotting._ And he has used Kylo for the last two centuries to cling to whatever miserable life he has left. She swallows back the acid burning on her tongue and does everything in her ability to curtail her emotions.

“You knew Hux wouldn’t remain idle for long.” Kylo remarks, tone deceptively conversational.

“I knew,” he agrees with a spine tingling chuckle. “And you, Kylo Ren, were as predictable as expected, but you,” he glances over at Rey, “I thought I’d lost you.”

Rey bares her teeth at his tone, unsettled by its apparent tenderness. “I was never yours to lose.”

“Now that’s where you’re wrong, _little moonrunner_ . You are mine. You wouldn’t even _be_ without me.”

Anger flares in her gut, twisting her insides. His words are true no matter how desperately she’d like to deny them. She is a clone, not born from the womb of a mother or the loins of a father, but a construct grown in _this_ sick bastard’s lab at his behest. “Your scientists cooked me up. Don’t go taking all the credit!” she snipes.

He laughs, long and loud and unsettling. “Clever pet, I was more involved than you think.” His glittering eyes shift to Kylo and something passes between them.

Rey notes the stillness of Kylo’s shoulders, as though no breath passes his lips, and the _rage_ —it rolls off him in suffocating waves. “I suppose I should thank you, master, for achieving the one thing I could not.” Each word is a dagger wrapped in silk from his plush mouth and Rey realizes, at once, the fractured nature of his expression, his hands furled, adam’s apple bobbing, but he never breaks eye contact with Snoke.

_Kylo…?_

“She is rather magnificent, isn’t she?” Snoke boasts, his greedy attention centering on her. She takes an unconscious step toward Kylo and his mouth breaks into a malevolent grin. “I must admit my disappointment in the beginning when the queen embryo didn’t survive, but I soon realized the superior breeder did... and she has yet to fully awaken. I’m eager to see her total potential.”

Kylo lurches forward, his face a menacing tangle of emotions. “She doesn’t belong to you!”

The rest of the praetorian guard join ranks around their supreme leader, a smear of ruby blood bracketing festered gold with their sickled, glittering weapons grinning like the maws of rabid wolves. Rey finds the lack of technologically advanced weapons all the more disquieting if she’s honest. This whole ordeal is like some mad drama on a sick man’s stage.

Then, a sudden explosion of light from behind, from in front, from all around—and she hears them. They are overjoyed, pouring into her consciousness as wave after wave of segmented awareness, reaching for her, earnest and calling the only word need called. _Mother!_

She feels them before they appear, fluid bodies of shadow coming down upon Snoke’s guardians like a hellish whirlwind, claws sparking against armor and mingling with their barbaric, animal shrieks. Tails lashing, teeth exposed in a chilling smile of murder. She knows them. They are…

Tears sting her eyes and the alien part of her wails, overjoyed at the sight of them, _her children_. Red and black spin across the room like elegant dancers in a lethal waltz and Rey watches with rapt fascination, the reptilian in her blood humming with delight. Kylo moves swiftly to her side and she nods, both aiming their sights at the only target not yet engaged. He glares at them from across the heat of battle, his colorless eyes wide with shock and his tear of a mouth wrenched into a furious sneer.

Kylo jumps first, charging forward and taking down a staggering praetorian as two of her children skewer him through the middle, blood smearing across the floor in a macabre splatter of crimson. Rey grins unabashedly, pride swelling in her chest at the sight as Kylo hastily grabs the dead man’s weapon, his eyes set on Snoke. She hurries after him with rage pounding through her veins, clouding her thoughts, pommeling through her skull like a drum and driving her baser self into a frenzy.

 _‘Kill him!’_ Her children screech through their connection. ‘ _Kill the false father!’_

 _‘I gave everything I had to you.’_ Kylo’s whisper overlaps. ‘ _And I was a fool…’_

Snoke’s expression is a caricature of furious horror as Kylo leaps forward, weapon drawn over his head and eyes cold, resolute. But before they can reach him, another praetorian slices through the corner of Rey’s vision, taking her by surprise and knocking her sideways with a brute kick. The air leaves her lungs in a rush and she hits the floor elbow first. Her bones rattle and scream in protest as she claws for air, eyes watering and static filling her ears.

“Rey!”

A heartbreaking yelp of pain.

Rey’s insides twist with anguish and her mouth drops open as she watches one of her children fall to the ground—her youngest she somehow knows—the juvenile's body collapsing several feet away from its severed head. She stares uselessly at the sight, body quivering, but the battle leaves no time for mourning. Seconds later a second departing screech cuts through the chaos and she whirls, finding another of her children slain and two of Snoke’s guards stalking towards her.

“Rey!” Kylo’s voice shouts again.

She scans the room, finding him in the middle of a deadly scuffle whilst her surviving children occupy four of the remaining praetorians. That leaves Rey to fend for herself. She scuttles backwards in an attempt to put distance between her and her attackers before pulling herself upright, though not without difficulty. They close in, orbiting around her like two gory satellites, their weapons low and angled for her throat.

A third death howl suddenly stabs through Rey’s heart like a javelin and she groans, tears falling freely to her chin and her body quaking with wrath. She searches for her fallen offspring and finds it near Kylo, acid blood eroding at his adversary’s crooked scythe.

 _It was trying to protect him_ , Rey realizes with a bitter sob.

From the corner of her vision she spots Snoke. He lingers just beyond the battle, gaze ravenous and calculating while he watches her. And her _alone_. The wrath in her manifests as a living thing, charged and hammering the underside of her skin like a violent storm, demanding to break out, to spread and engulf her world in a choking, swirling wall of hatred. She pivots on the balls of her feet, intent to kill—

—when two blades bisect the air in front of her, one whistling right for her neck, the other for her knees, and she remembers herself. Moving on instinct, Rey launches forward, somersaulting between her two opponents and landing on her feet in a shaky run. Kylo fights just yards away and her remaining children are struggling.

 _I won’t lose them!_ Her mind snarls.

“Kill the drones! I want my breeders alive!” Snoke booms hungrily above the fray, a touch of panic in his voice.

“No!” she screams.

 _‘Protect mother. Protect her mate.’_ their unquestioning voices murmur, over and over. Calm. Resolute.

Kylo spins on his feet, twisting to avoid a downward slash from his aggressor’s weapon just as Rey reaches him and leaps blindly, crashing into the praetorian with her entire body and knocking him several steps back. It’s all the distraction Kylo needs and he angles forward, swinging his scythe wide and causing the guard to side-step too far, shifting him off balance and directly into Rey’s awaiting hands. She crouches low, pistoning a hard kick into his solar plexus as her fingers wrap around the hand-grip of his weapon and Kylo swoops in, decapitating him with one fluid motion.

_‘Mother! Behind you!’_

The panicked wail ignites her blood and she whirls, a blade glinting toward her face faster than she can register and Kylo is suddenly shoving her aside, taking the brunt of the attack. He barks in surprise as the praetorian slices down his shoulder and Rey’s mind rings with his pain.

 _The two gory satellites._ She curses herself for her momentary slip in judgement at not killing them sooner.

The next barrels in, aiming for Kylo’s middle, but she has thankfully found her bearing. Sliding out her right foot, she swings low and up in a tight hook, sending the sickle straight through the vulnerable gap of armor into the poor bastard’s throat. Kylo shields her exposed side, using his good arm as the following guard attempts to take out her legs.

“I said I want them _alive_!” Snoke shouts angrily, but it appears his attack dogs care only in eliminating the threat.

Then, a hail of plasma fire suddenly erupts from the elevator and Rey looks in time to see a flash of blonde hair glinting off a small, lithe silhouette. Relief floods her body at once. “Kaydel!” She calls out, overjoyed.

“Help them!” Kaydel commands the two Resistance soldiers flanking her.

But before Kaydel can reach them, a stabbing pain bleeds over Rey’s skull, forcing her down to her knees in agony. She cries out, able to do little else as her brain swells like a balloon, pressing against her eye sockets and coaxing blood down her cheeks. Her vision stings and the sutures of her skull rasp violently against one another until her stomach twists savagely, and she vomits on the floor.

 _‘Rey!’_ Kylo groans. _‘It_ — _Snoke!’_

Through the churning ocean of her consciousness she reaches for him, finding his arm, remembering that the wetness she feels is his blood. Further through the haze she sees her children writhing on the floor, squealing. And Kaydel near the stairs leading up to the throne. _She isn’t moving._ The two Resistance soldiers are in the grips of Snoke’s guard, matching stains of red down their chests. Despair breaks out over Rey’s skin like a plague, making her thrash and bite through her howls, rendering her mind a sinking mire of quicksand as she is dragged swiftly to the blackness of that age-old abyss.

 _No! I have to stay awake! I have to_ —

_‘Mother…’_

_‘Rey…’_ Kylo’s fingers interlace with hers and she descends, further and further down.

Though just before the waves take her, she sees Snoke’s face gloating from above, close enough to distinguish the bulging veins of his eyes, the glistening smear of crimson spilling over his lips like a flood. His skin looks even more translucent this close. Close enough to smell the death on him. She tries to turn away… and the world fades.

 

x

. x .

x

 

“You and your ilk should have known better than to trust the Regent.”

Her mind stirs at the grinding whisper of Snoke’s voice.

“I have nothing to say to you.”

_Kaydel._

Rey’s fingers twitch and she attempts to open her eyes, but her body feels foggy and lethargic, as if—

 _We’ve been drugged_ , the alien part of her drawls.

“You would be wise not to test my patience, citizen 5235. Our surveillance system is still down, but rest assured _my_ men are searching every inch of this dome. Your leader is dead and your people are in a panic.”

Three beats of silence.

“Give me the codes.”

Another beat.

Then, a sharp thwack of sound, followed on the heels by a pained cry. Rey grits her teeth, prying open her heavy eyelids and instantly regretting the action as sterile light pierces her vision. A rusty groan escapes her throat and she blinks against the hollow throbbing battering at her skull.

Hollow footfalls approach and a bony finger curls under her chin, angling her face upward. The smell gives him away and the texture of his flesh makes her skin crawl. It’s dry, thin like paper and she can feel the fever on him. _He is a plague_ , she growls in disgust, attempting to pull her chin away, but exhaustion has left her body somewhere separate of her brain and she does little more than tremble. With her eyes finally growing accustomed to the brightness, she looks up into that hideous face.

Dried blood, a violent stain caking his upper lip like some tasteless attempt at humor; bulging febrile eyes, gnarled flesh, puckered and gray, and a grin that fits more a man at the depth of the gallows than a supreme leader at the height of his rule.

 _Fear._ she murmurs. _He is afraid._

_Of what?_

_‘Of you.’_ Kylo’s whisper ripples distantly across the periphery of her conscious and she starts, looking around for him. She finds his body several feet away, limp, unresponsive.

“Don’t worry with him. He’ll come around in a few minutes.” Snoke reveals, a touch of exhaustion hidden beneath his sly tone.

She glances at the blood caked below his nose again. _You stretched your abilities_ , she realizes. _Pushed yourself too far._

Assessing her new surroundings, she finds Kaydel crumpled, gory and unconscious on the floor near two praetorians lurking at the immediate bend of an entirely new room; a room smaller than the throne chamber, but no less daunting, and filled with large cylindrical tanks. The other survivors of Snoke’s guard must be scouring the dome with his men. Too bad these two aren’t alongside them, though she doubts very much she’d have a chance at Snoke with both her wrists and ankles bound.

But what of her three remaining children? Had Snoke seen to their execution? She grits her teeth, refusing to believe such an assumption.

Papery fingers trace along her jawline, drawing her attention back to the owner of the hand. “I must admit, Hux can be quite sagacious in these rare shining moments. Secretly dividing the Resistance forces to procure the KOR unit, then sending you up to my chambers unarmed as a distraction. I’m impressed.” Snoke breaks eye contact with her to stare at one of the cameras in the room.

Rey considers his words. If what he says is true, then Hux betrayed Poe, cut him off and capitalized on the following chaos among the Resistance in order to place them where he saw fit, using both her and Kylo as the lure of distraction. Even she is impressed. A dangerous enemy, but a far more dangerous ally, this Regent. _And we’ve yet to exhaust our usefulness to him_ , she reflects. _When we do, he will end us as well._ A tingle of fear and remorse flares up in her chest, fear for herself, for Kylo, for Kaydel, and remorse for all the lives spent—such a wasteful business, this war—but she quells it, focusing instead on the icy blade of wrath wedged between her ribs.

 _Calm. Steady._ The alien in her murmurs. _Wait for the opportune moment._

“That must sting.” Rey snipes, renewed hatred flooding her body. “And you almost lost your head for that little mistake. Without those pretty red guards, you’d be dead!”

Snoke appears unperturbed by her outburst, his expression indefinable as he tilts her chin closer to his face. She wants to bite his hand, take flesh and bone if she can, but she refrains. After a long pause he steps away, releasing her and standing near what appears to be an operating table.

“Do you remember this room?” he asks.

Rey only stares, mute.

“This is where you were born.” he declares ceremoniously, opening his arms as though a father beckoning in a lost child.

She blinks, flooded by an emotion she can’t quite decipher.

He motions to one of his guards. “Help her to her feet.”

The praetorian steps forward, yanking Rey up by her hair and forcing a startled cry from her throat. She grits her teeth, pinching the inside of her cheek and glaring daggers at Snoke. Whatever he did to her has left her body unresponsive to command and a low throb swells at the base of her skull. It lacks the intensity of what she’d felt previously, but the ghosts of that pain warn it could start again.

“Take her for a tour.” Snoke commands.

Rey groans as she is hoisted forth and walked around like a fish dangling from the end of a hook. Her scalp screams in protest, but she can do little more than wiggle against the guard’s hold. He steps her forward to a narrow walkway, leading up to the grinning crescent of tanks spanning the back of the room. They are wide and squatted, filled with viscous, rusty liquid the color of the daytime desert dunes. They make her think of faceless, shapeless gargoyles with soured wombs.

The praetorian leads her up to the first tank and stops. Inside she sees the remnants of a human silhouette, or at least… mostly human. As she peers closer she notes the long unnatural fingers, the visage seemingly unsure of its own shape, gaunt and warped, defined by a lipless mouth and the ridges of translucent armor along its naked shoulders. The rest of its body is a vulgar insult to symmetry and she must avert her eyes, sickened.

“You should be happy to see your sisters.” Snoke croons.

The next tank reveals an even less human version of herself; a hairless succubus with curves of bone and teeth, and a deadly tail wrapped sensuously around the lifeless body. No eyes, no nose and an elongated skull complete the monster’s appearance.

The third tank is enough to make Rey wrench in her captor’s hold and she refuses to look anymore, tears threatening her vision. She abhors them, abhors how they warm her clammy face, branding her, rendering her weak. Useless. _Does this not end_ , she wonders scathingly. _Is there no stillness in the dark? Is there nothing but the same unbroken circle of pain, over and over again?_

Snoke raps his unseemly nails atop the metal table, eyes glinting at her. “You know— _Rey_ —Kylo never told your progenitor how he became my first Knight of Ren, how he had… _fallen_ as his mother had put it, like God’s precious angel.” The pale hollow of his face conjures up images of Death in Rey’s mind, Red Death.

“I know about Han Solo.” she grits out.

He chuckles. “No, my pet. I’m referring to history after Han Solo.”

_‘Rey.’_

Her head jerks in Kylo’s direction, unsettled by the fitfulness of his voice. She finds him staring up at her from his position on the floor, fully conscious and lips pressed into that telltale expression of disquiet. He sounds _afraid_. Her stomach twists anxiously.

“Oh come now, don’t play coy, Ben Solo. Tell your queen the truth. She deserves to know.” Snoke grins down at him, the sadistic light in his gaze practically spinning with delight.

The agony of her scalp diminishes as she concentrates solely on her lover, everything in her world suddenly balanced atop the precarious tip of a needle. “Kylo?”

His nostrils flare and his eyes, now wide and round and dark, stare at her like a begging child lost on the sea, a black sea. Why is he looking at her as if she might shatter him into a thousand pieces? Why do his eyes say he’s sorry, sorrier than sorry, sorry he ever even breathed in her presence, ever touched her, tasted her, embraced her and made her scream to take her further… all the way to oblivion.

The suffocating room around Rey closes in, making her chest tight with panic. “Kylo?” _Please don’t tell me that after all I’ve learned, all the faces who have become strangers to me—don’t you dare tell me you are, too. Don’t tell me you betrayed me after—_

“I…”

Snoke’s throaty chuckle reverberates through the low-ceilinged room like thunder. “Killing Han Solo might have been enough to join my ranks, but it wasn’t enough to repay my saving his life after being infected by a Xenomorph parasite, one you—however inadvertently—had exposed him to.”

Rey’s blood suddenly runs cold.

“And I was only too thrilled to help my young knight after learning his only desire was to infect you in turn. But first, of course, I had convinced him to seduce you, to build the charade to a crescendo that was sure to utterly destroy you.” He pauses, tilting his head in mock thought. “After all, you were his mother’s and his uncle’s favorite, the face of the Resistance, their savior. I was pleasantly rewarded to find you not as virtuous as the Resistance propaganda had insisted. No... You liked _fucking_ a monster, didn’t you?”

Old memories rush to the forefront of her mind, flashes of rough hands, snarling teeth, a first kiss; her real first kiss in that lifetime had happened with _him_ , when they’d met on the battlefield of some desolate planet engulfed by roiling black seas. She’d seen him for the first time following Han’s death and what he had become—an alien, a monster.

_Her enemy._

The kiss had been savage, sharp at the edges with sinful wet lips which had leached a moan so scandalous from her she’d hated herself. And she had _bitten_ him, drawn blood. He’d bitten her, too. _Here_ , she moves instinctively to touch that soft part of her neck, her binders clinking. She’d actually delighted in seeing her blood glistening at the corner of his mouth.

It wasn’t long after that they’d…

_‘Rey.’_

Ringing blooms in her ears, overwhelming Kylo’s frail plea and her stomach twists, a violent knot of revulsion threatening to claw its way up her throat and spill all over this lab’s pristine floor. But she swallows it back, taking a resolute breath and pushing the pain deep into the cracks, hiding it down in her bones, because now is not the time. And Snoke hopes she will act foolishly.

She _won’t_. Yet—

_“You’re mother still loves you, you know.”_

_Silence. Then: “I know.”_

_“Will you go back to him? To Snoke?”_

_“No.” A soft kiss against her forehead as they lay naked and sleepy on the floor of his father’s old ship._

_“You’ll stand with me, then? You’ll help me end this?”_

_Fingertips ghosting over her spine. A tail sliding between her legs, teasing her. “Yes.”_

_‘Rey?’_

The memory fades…

And her nails carve crescents into her palms, the anger converging, honing into a lethal blade of focus; her decision made. _I told you we’d finish this together. What happened then is dead. This is now._

His eyes soften with fathomless regret and he nods, a single sharp jerk of movement.

Snoke approaches, cocking his head blithely, then motioning to the guard with her hair still in his grasp. “Release her.”

Rey hits to the floor with a painful thump, her knees biting into the metal surface and her head quaking.

“Bring me Citizen 5235.”

Her heart all at once gallops in her chest at Snoke’s command and she watches Kaydel be cruelly roused, and dragged forward to his feet. The supreme leader himself merely observes the entire scene with detached interest.

“Kaydel?” Rey whispers, voice ragged with emotion.

“I’m sorry.” her friend murmurs, chest heaving. “I’m so sorry, Rey. I should have never left. I should have…”

“It doesn’t matter. Don’t apologize.” Rey tries to assure her.

“Rey I—”

In a sudden flash, Snoke drives a hidden dagger into Kaydel’s neck and Rey’s entire world implodes. She screams, face frozen in an expression of absolute horror as she watches Kaydel’s head rips back helplessly, the girl’s eyes wide with shock and lips trembling. The blood begins at a trickle; then a cascade, staining the pretty cream skin of her jaw, her neck, her yellow shirt, and finally pooling at her folded knees.

“No!” Rey wails. “No, no!”

Kylo struggles at the corner of her vision, but she’s struck dumb by Kaydel’s searching eyes. They shimmer like gold and summer in the bright lights. _We have the same eyes_ , Rey murmurs repeatedly, unable to break from that simple thought. As a young child she had safeguarded a fantasy of Kaydel being her lost family. If not a set of parents, she’d told herself, then a sister would work just fine.

Unfortunately, she’d never had the courage to tell Kaydel. Now… she wishes she had.

Kaydel’s throat attempts to work, words trapped in a well of blood and knife-metal. “Re—Re—Fi—”

Her lashes flicker, her neck muscles spasm and the life dims from her eyes.

Rey feels her heart shatter as the girl’s head slumps forward.

_Gone._

 

x

. x .

x

 

It’s been several hours since the storming of the Black Needle, several hours since all hell had broken loose and Finn had found himself trapped in the service tunnels beneath Supremacy Sector. It was a catastrophe, so much blood, so much death; friends and comrades dropping beside him, and the sentinels bearing down upon him with Snoke’s new army. All he had time to do was shoot and run, each friend who fell dead before their body ever hit the ground.

And what of Rose? Kaydel? Poe?

He had hoped beyond hope that they were still alive, still fighting just like him.

And then… he’d heard it, blaring across every loud speaker of the dome: “Attention all hostile forces loyal to the Resistance. We have eliminated your commander! Escape is impossible! Lay down your weapons immediately! Surrender now, and you will be shown leniency!”

“No!” he’d immediately snarled. _It’s a trick!_ But there was doubt.

And it grows even now, stronger and stronger with each passing minute down here in the dark, serpentine conduits he has learned to call home. He needs to find Rose. He needs to—

A loud suddenly boom echoes at his back and he ducks behind a slew of debris, weapon pointed blindly into the inky gloom. Another follows, then a succession of them, like rapid gunfire, shaking the entire foundation around him.

“Rose, come in!” he hisses through the wrist comm.

No answer. _Just as before._

“Rose! Where are you? Come in!”

Nothing.

He lets out a growl of frustration and tries to rally his pounding heart. _If she’s been killed then…_ Finn forces the thought away with disgust and bites a punishing wound into his tongue. _She’s alive. So is Kaydel. So is Poe. They’re all alive._ The tang of blood seems to center him for a moment and he scans his surroundings.

Two emergency escape exits from the Black Needle. But which one to take?

Before both Kaydel and Rose had disappeared in the fray, relaying one final message over the comms, _“We’ve been betrayed! All units head for the escape tunnel!”_

To Finn, Rose whispered only this: “I’ll find you, I promise, but I can’t let Kaydel do it alone.”

“Do what?!” Finn had demanded, furious and terrified for them as a fresh barrage of plasma fire drove his remaining unit into the sewers.

He never received an answer.

Glaring at both doors, he makes up his mind and storms through the one on the left, expecting a hail of gunfire to greet him, though he is pleasantly disappointed. The flights of emergency stairs are stone silent; empty. After checking the shadows for hidden eyes and finding none, he sprints ahead, taking two—sometimes three—steps at a time, the weapon looped across his chest banging against him, an anchor in this cruel nightmare, reminding him of his purpose… his _raison d'etre_.

Truthfully, Finn had fully recognized his raison d’etre the night Rey called Rose out on her pregnancy. Learning of it only two nights prior to this had left him at a loss. Rose was seated at his feet, her chin resting on his knee and her arms looped around his calves. Staring down at her from their shared bed, a swell of happiness had overwhelmed him, but it was quickly followed by a suffocating dread. The sensation chilled his stomach, leaving him ill despite the afterglow of his orgasm.

 _“Don’t ask me not to fight. You cannot ask me that. Not after everything the First Order has taken from me.”_ Her dusky eyes had flashed, the apples of her cheeks bright and pink.

 _“Rose, I_ —”

 _“I can’t just sit back while those I care about_ —”

 _“You can’t say something like that! You can’t just tell me not to want you safe after learning you’re…”_ he couldn’t utter the word; it had eluded him that night, the fear of it working down into his bones. _“What do you want from me?”_

 _“I don’t want anything from you, Finn.”_ She kissed his knee. _“I just don’t want to lose anyone else.”_

He breathes in the memory, using it as kindling for the spark in his belly, letting it rouse, letting it catch and surge, up and up, and up. His lungs howl at him, but he ignores them. His muscles wail in protest and he pushes them further, faster, soaring up the flights of stairs with this throat chafed raw and his bones throbbing until, at last, he reaches the 33rd floor.

Bursting into the hallway, he doesn’t allow a second’s hesitation, spotting the trio of First Order soldiers and firing. They fall in a bloody heap on the floor as he leaps over them, weapon still aimed ahead. Though he has no way of knowing for sure where Rose and Kaydel have gone, he has a hunch. Kaydel wouldn’t have left her best friend to Snoke, nor would Rose even consider allowing the supreme leader to reclaim his pets.

They’re headed for the main lab, located somewhere on one of the unmarked floors of this building. And the only way to get there? A hidden elevator. The rumors around First Order personnel is that this same elevator leads to Snoke’s throne room. The only problem is finding said elevator.

Rolling flashes of visceral ruby pulsate down the hallways as the emergency alarms blare, drilling savagely into Finn’s ears while the light themselves leave him disoriented. He pauses in a four-way intersection to catch his breath, blood hammering through his skull.

“Oh my God! Finn!”

His knees nearly buckle beneath him as he catches sight of a familiar figure hastening toward him, sweat-drenched and raven hair whipping about her face. He scoops her up at once and forces her against his chest, wondering very seriously for a moment if he could simply chain her to him. _Indefinitely._

“If you ever do that again,” he breaks off to plant a kiss on her cheek, “I’ll kill you myself.” A second kiss, sloppy and painful against her lips. “Do you hear me? Answer me, Rose!”

Her little breaths puff across his mouth as she leans her forehead against his. “I won’t say I’m sorry. But I’m here.”

His anger nearly wins out until he decides instead to give her another bruising kiss. She melts into him, sighing huskily and winding her hands into his jacket. He breaks away, coming back to himself. “Where’s Kaydel? Where’s Poe?”

Rose’s gaze flickers with uncertainty. “Poe got separated from Rey. I hurried here to help Kaydel, but she was already on her way to the throne room. She’d said we’d all meet here, but that was three hours ago.”

Finn’s heart sinks.

“I’ve tried to use the elevator to the lab, but it can no longer be accessed. It looks like the Regent has overridden the security systems.”

“No. It’s Snoke.” Finn exhales the name roughly.

Fear grips Rose’s expression, but before she can reply the sound of smooth footsteps approach and a ghostly pair of red eyes appear out of the shadows. Finn raises his weapon and Rose stares slack-jawed as the machine chances another step.

“Stop!” Finn growls.

“We don’t have time for that.” The AutoReiv deadpans. “You’re needed.”

“Who are you?” Rose demands, gaze hardening.

“Your _defector_ knows precisely who I am and he also knows I wouldn’t have come here unless I was sent to provide assistance.”

“You’re lying.” Finn mutters, still awestruck. “The Regent wouldn’t be helping us unless…”

“... unless he had no other option.” the AutoReiv finishes for him, albeit a tad impatiently. “And mind you, if he had another option he would gladly take it.”

Rose pulls herself out of Finn’s arms. “Where is Kaydel?”

The AutoReiv turns its chrome face toward her. “Where you need to be before it’s too late.”

As if to punctuate the entourage’s words, a blinding scream suddenly rips through their minds with gut-wrenching agony, rending their souls in two and rattling the very bones of the world. And they know, without any hesitation, that the queen has finally awakened.

 

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**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **PLEASE REMEMBER TO LEAVE ME SOME FEEDBACK!  
> ** **CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM IS WELCOME!**  
>    
> 
> 
> **Chapter References:**  
> 
> 
> **Rey // Citizen 2514 --** 2514 = Ben  
>  **Kaydel // Citizen 5235 --** 5235 = [Ewe](https://whatismyspiritanimal.com/spirit-totem-power-animal-meanings/mammals/sheep-symbolism-meaning/#SheepSymbolism) (female sheep)
> 
> ** I used 'ewe' specifically to connect Kaydel with various elements of sheep symbolism, especially sacrifice, the circle of life and understanding.
> 
>  **Some of My Other Reylo Projects:**  
>  [Broken Scion](https://archiveofourown.org/works/11808483/chapters/41569640): High fantasy AU heavily inspired by The Dark Tower Series with some Dune and Game of Thrones elements.  
>  [Her Killing Moon](https://archiveofourown.org/works/13656315/chapters/31366239): Modern dark AU with werewolf!Kylo and human-turned-vampire!Rey.


	5. Part V: Godhead Emanation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **A/N:** This is it! Hieros Gamos has reached it's final installment and I couldn't be happier! This project was a very interesting experience and quite fun to write. Also, I've decided there will be **a surprise epilogue** since I've been so stingy with the smut, so stay tuned for that! _Also, I didn't have a beta for this installment, so there are errors. Feel free to point them out if you desire._
> 
>  **Music List:** [Half God Half Devil - In This Moment](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iwzaIEmaW0s) [River of Fire - In This moment](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fd8EdAsIEQI), and [Shaws Paradise/Space Ambience Loop](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rkAguCM2ZKE)
> 
>  **CHAPTER WARNINGS:**  
>  \- Dark Rey / Questionable Morals Rey 
> 
> \- Gore Depictions / Blood / Burning / Snoke is so Fucked / Our Babies Are Gore-Fiends TBQH
> 
> \- Secondary Character Deaths / Minor Character Deaths (Yup, there's more.)
> 
> \- Angst and Suffering / Pregnancy Mention (again)

**♚ ✶ PART V MUSIC ✶ ♕**

 

* * *

.

_"If you wanna survive in this world, you better grow some fucking teeth."_

\- My father, one very dangerous man

.

_"So step inside, step inside.  
See the devil in I, see the devil in I."_

\- Slipknot, The Devil in I

.

* * *

 

Rey had always assumed she was awake. All her life: sleeping, waking, trekking through the cursed desert in the biting winds, the thick night gloom, staring back at the sharp glow of the dome—her lighthouse on a stygian sea with no moon, no stars—only to repeat the process over and over again. She had been so sure she knew what being awake felt like, what it meant but…

Like everything else in her burrowed life, she’d been wrong.

Blood drips to the harshly lit floor, a splash of hypnotic plum and ruby. Above Kaydel’s gore-smeared face Snoke looks out at Rey with the same predatory ease he had when she was a child, curled up in his shadowy lap and wondering who it was he had sought so desperately after. Brittle, knife-like teeth glinting, sagging papery jowls and that whisper, _“Call him, my precious. Call him home.”_

The memory stirs the Other within her to rise, to soar, licking up her veins like fire, searing her insides and making something splinter, making it crack and scatter like slivered ashes. She nearly doubles over from the pain, realizing hopelessly that it’s her heart.

 _‘It’s time.’_ the Other murmurs — **screams** . ‘ _It’s time to wake up!’_

Fresh awareness spreads with the fire, catching along her nerve endings and igniting a novel skin of prescience she never knew existed. It’s overwhelming, all-encompassing, excruciating… like a snake sloughing off it’s old armor for the new.

But it has always been there, hasn’t it?

 _Yes._ Stretched over her like a protective shell.

 _‘You’ve only ever lived a half life in this dome,’_ the Other asserts, sinking deep into her soul, notching into place. _‘I had to protect us. You couldn’t have withstood the truth back then and Snoke had to remain the fool.’_

 _And now?_ Rey bites.

_‘Now we will paint the world with his blood.’_

As if the crack of a whip, Rey’s head rips back, body surging forward and something at the base of her spine rushing upward, vertebrae by vertebrae, until colliding with her skull. The violent impact forces a guttural howl from her chest more reminiscent of a wild animal than a human. It rends the world in two as a chorus of havoc follows on its heels, screeching and snapping around her. Holding tanks raining glass, lights flashing like dying stars, sparks flying and there—

Her eyes snap open with blinding awareness as she sees them. Lit wicks of life in the inky ocean of her dreams all around her. Countless lives. Then, a sky blanketed by diamonds of _new_ life. She can see each one now, down to the last child.

 _This is what you feared. Once you understood the truth, you realized what you created… should she ever become whole._ Rey’s glare centers on Snoke, finding the man’s face sallow and bloodless. Kaydel’s body lays limp below him, released from his disgusting hands.

“Father.” she purrs, lips curling into a grin. “That’s what you are to me, aren’t you? _Father_.”

Snoke straightens and takes an uneven step back, allowing the two praetorians to surround him. “Yes. I made you. You are my greatest achievement, my magnum opus.” he affirms, hungry lust still present in his gaze.

An explosion suddenly rocks the structure.

Lesser explosions follow it in quick succession.

Rey risks a glance over at Kylo, finding him already on his feet. His signature dances like an erratic storm as their eyes meet, his own a shade deeper than pitch and a wild fervor suffusing his cheeks, his lips, the tantalizing line of his neck…

She swallows.

“What will you do now, Rey?” Snoke asks loftily, snatching her attention again. Behind his guard he appears so frail, a spindly old husk of twigs swathed in faux gold.

Another series of explosions tremble around them—

—and the praetorians tighten their ranks, taking a united step back to push their supreme leader closer to the door.

Kylo shifts his stance, glass slivers winking in his hair.  

That’s when she sees their glowing signatures hidden just beyond the door. _Finn. Rose._

“I am going to kill you.” Rey deadpans, keeping any excitement from her expression. “I’m going to ruin your corpse and then I’m going to dismantle everything you’ve ever built.”

“Is death so necessary?” he asks, his tone liquid and melodic. “What about your remaining children? Must they die, too? Surely we can come to an arrangement. Surely there is something you want that is within my power to give.”

Rage melts into her tongue, demanding she fling her words like daggers, but she suppresses the urge, allowing instead, a soft dripping venom. “I want my children released. I want my beloved as he was _before_ you mutilated him.” Unexpected tears cut down her cheeks, hot and acidic as her teeth flash. “And. I. Want. My. _Friend. BACK_!”

The metal around them creaks in protest and the glass fragments on the floor tremble as her rage manifests, becoming a tangible raw bubble of emotion threatening to erupt. _You destroyed everything I’ve ever loved!_ Her mind howls, the tears burning like poison.

Then, without warning, a blinding light floods the room. Deafening sound blasts her senses, obliterating her equilibrium and forcing her backwards. She doesn’t realize she’s hit the wall until her body crumples to the ground with her bones vibrating and her head ringing. Looking up as the smoke clears, she sees a fresh hole scorched into what used to be the exit door—and loses focus for a moment, or two, or three…

 _Finn and Rose must have set charges_ , she processes distantly.

_‘Rey!’_

“Kylo?” she croaks.

A large hand soothes back the hair from her forehead while its partner checks her for any injuries and she leans into the touch, buoyed by the scent of him. Lips brush her ear, warmth enveloping her as he whispers, “Let’s finish it, Rey. Stand up.”

Rifle fire punctures the wall of fog blanketing her skull and her awareness slams swiftly back into place. A quick flash of movement draws her eyes to the blast hole just in time to see Finn and Rose rush in and one of the praetorians engage them. Kylo offers his hand to her and she looks at him, a wildness crackling in her veins as she takes it and lets him hoist her to her feet.

_Justice is a cruel though impartial mistress…_

Snoke skulks near the blast hole, inching his way closer to escape with his red guard protecting him from the chaos. Rey’s fingers twitch violently and her insides curdle with revulsion at the sight.

_… and it’s time for justice._

Finn struggles against the praetorian as Rose aims her rifle for his shiny helm, but before she can fire Finn is thrust sideways off his feet and collides painfully with one of the broken tanks, thankfully missing the deadly edges of glass. Rose attempts to counter, but her concern for Finn causes her to hesitate and the crimson executioner swings his hellish scythe, meaning this to end her.

“No!” Finn cries.

Rey pivots on instinct, ready to surge forward and place herself in harm’s way for a woman she hardly knows—

—when a hulking shadow beats her to it.

Finn mirrors Rose’s gaping expression of incredulity as Kylo averts the praetorian’s kill stroke with a well-placed kick to the exposed back of the knee, grabbing the snathe of the weapon when the guard buckles and angling it upward. This all appears to happen in one fluid motion of a formless shadow.

The last praetorian comes in from the far side beyond Kylo’s periphery. Snoke barks Rey’s name as Finn clambers for his weapon, but he will not reach it in time. Rey turns back, realizing her folly and Rose shifts her rifle, aiming true. Kylo wrenches the scythe free from his opponent and finishes him just as Rose fires a round into the closing praetorian’s shoulder. It isn’t enough to kill, but enough to give Kylo a hair’s breadth to react. He twists his body, only missing the incoming blade by centimeters and thrusting out his arm.

Sound drains from the world, sucked into some distant dark hole, leaving only a slow mellifluous purr. Rey recognizes the sound at once, memories crashing into her like waves.

_“Don’t be afraid.”_

_“I’m not!”_

_“Then why are you trembling?”_

She stares on in awe at Kylo’s hollow black eyes, his cold hostile features. The praetorian stands frozen, a red statue of stone.

_“I can show you how to control it, how to wield it.”_

_“No!”_

_“Why?”_

_“I’m not a monster like you!”_

_“Yes you are. You just don’t know it yet.”_

Her lover’s fingers contort like ebony talons as a muscle beneath his eye twitches and the guard’s neck rips to the side, snapping so hard his helmet flies free and clangs against the opposite wall. Heavy silence follows, Kylo rigid in his stance and Rey overcome by something akin to predatory glee. It occurs to her that she should be appalled by the feeling, _should be_ … but she isn’t. Instead her womb clenches earnestly at the sight of him and she forces her thighs together, catching the glint of animal hunger in his sidelong glance.

“Stop!”

Finn’s abrasive command draws all eyes to the doorway—

—where Snoke’s golden robes shiver to a halt. He peers over his shoulder, face twisted with panicked rage and knotted cheeks puckered in a hideous sneer. His feverish gaze darts from Finn and his rifle to Rose, her hardware raised and her finger on the trigger, then to Rey… and finally to Kylo. He turns slowly to face his old apprentice, febrile eyes catching the harsh lights like dead pools of mercury.

“So this is where it ends?” He takes a careful step forward, keeping his gaze on Kylo. “Your hatred for me is palpable, but remember it was I who gave you the will to live. It was I who saved your life and offered you a better one.”

Kylo rises to his full height, mountainous shoulders taut, hands dropped deceptively at his sides and jaw a hard line of anticipation. His eyes betray a living darkness, a darkness which Rey knows can easily reach out and scatter his old master’s bones to the four winds.

And Snoke would be too drained to fight back.

Because he’s a vampire living on borrowed time.

 _Kylo’s. Mine. Everyone’s._   

Snoke chances another step. “Han Solo was weak. You know this. He lived as a pathetic fool and he died as one. Do you call that your true father?”

Finn and Rose shift their weapons uneasily, and come to stand beside Rey.

Kylo remains unmoved, detached from everyone in the room but Snoke.

 _‘Kylo?’_ Rey whispers.

No answer.

“You killed him, because he was _not_ your real father.” A third step closer now, close enough to reach out those ugly gnarled fingers and touch his face. “All he ever offered you was disappointment. What have I offered you, Kylo Ren?”

 _‘He’s manipulating you!’_ she hisses.

Still, no answer.

“For who is your true father if it is not me?” Snoke challenges softly. “All I’ve ever done is respond according to your actions, your triumphs and your failures.”

Kylo’s adam’s apple bobs with a swallow.

“I even brought Rey back to you.”

The statement catches Kylo off guard and his head spasms as if slapped. He glances at Rey, his expression too raw, too open.

“Don’t listen to him! He doesn’t define us!” Rey snarls.

Snoke continues on in spite of her, that mesmeric stare growing wider, deeper. “Kylo, what would your world be without me?”

They could attack this instant and Snoke wouldn’t stand a chance, but Rey looks to the man who has haunted her dreams all her life, who touched her heart before ever touching her body and ripped it free of her chest, only to lovingly sew it back together again… and finds doubt.

Frightful doubt.

“Ben.” she breathes.

His lashes flutter at her voice.

“We should just shoot him!” Rose growls.

One look at Snoke’s knowing smirk sends alarm bells off in Rey’s mind. _He has hypnotized him_ , she realizes. _The vile parasite’s last ditch effort to turn the tables in his favor._

Can she not already feel the invisible fingers of his mind spreading over her own, probing, hoping to penetrate and undermine? She sways unsteadily.

“Rey, what’s wrong?.” Finn grits out.

“Ben.” she tries again, a little louder this time.

Nothing.

“I made both of you. Even after I’m gone, neither of you will be able to escape the truth. You would have never been without me.” His arctic eyes center on Rey and he speaks to her directly. “It is because of me that you two stand here now. _I_ made that possible.”

She turns to Kylo, refusing to look anywhere else but him. He stands eerily motionless, expression plagued by inner turmoil. “Ben Solo. Kylo Ren. We all began as something else. You said those words to me. Now live by them!”

An alarm suddenly blares down the hall as the drone of main power pulses through the facility. _Shit!_ Reinforcements will be sent when their systems catalogue the damage done to the lab. Minutes—they have but minutes.

Snoke grins. “He belongs to me. Same as you, little moonrunner.”

She attempts to reach out to one of the others, but Snoke blocks any avenue of connection she might establish. Like Kylo, they appear to be trapped within, fighting unseeable monsters of their own making.

All the tables have turned. Save for her.

 _One more table_ , she projects at the supreme leader.

He chuckles. “You always were a formidable threat. I had warned my apprentice, but who am I to go up against the witchcraft of a woman.” The latter is stated with a hint of naked reproach… or is that jealousy?

Rey takes a threatening step forward. “Kylo will kill you. I’ll see to that soon enough.”

“And then you’ll paint the world with my blood?” Snoke’s teeth flash with a ghoulish grin.

“If there’s time.” she replies coolly.

“Monstrous.” He tilts his head, dragging out the first syllable of the word.

Fire melts the underside of her skin, but she maintains control, saying simply. “More than you dare to guess.”

His grin intensifies. “You have exactly ninety-three seconds, moonrunner.”

A fresh battery of explosions shakes the building and muffled shouts echo through the walls. Candle wicks gutter and snuff out in the black abyss of her awareness, lives extinguished, and she turns to Finn…

...only to see him, his face contorted in shocked fury as he trains his weapon on her chest. Rose follows suit, a strangled growl of resistance trapped in her throat.

_No!_

Rey reacts on instinct, one part of her realizing she cannot yet gauge her power and another bypassing compassion entirely. She pivots toward them, throwing out her hand with fingers spread wide and an animal sound wrenching from her gut. The resulting pulse of energy stings every nerve ending from shoulder to fingertip as her mind pushes outward, rupturing the building kinetic sphere inside of her like an atom bomb—when she hits a wall.

Pain swells behind her eyes and she can practically feel blood vessels bursting. The sensation makes her cry out, knees buckling as Snoke’s slithering voice rumbles in front of her.

“Do not shoot her.” he orders Finn and Rose, their eyes wild as they try to break free of his mental shackles.

Rey struggles, her mind kicking and screaming against the thought barrier, counting the seconds down in her chest like a slow, doomed heartbeat, gazing at Kaydel’s lifeless body and wishing more than anything that she could take it back, that she could have her friend alive and standing beside her.

“You will learn soon enough that you belong to me.” Snoke’s eyes settle on her, a fresh stream of blood pouring from his nostrils. “Just like when you were a child… before they stole you away and made you defiant.”

She groans against his hold, finding her limbs reduced to liquid, any attempt at rising to her feet thwarted by that bizarre invisible hand at the back of her neck, caressing down her spine. It reminds her of Kylo’s touch and she recoils in disgust.

“Thirty seconds.” Snoke informs her.

She claws at the wall, tearing through one layer only to find another, and another, and another. It flutters like an elastic band, closing only tighter each time. _The seconds are winding down_ , her alien side mutters. _You should try something else._  

But what?

What could she possibly—

Then, she sees it. Just behind Snoke. A razor shred of metal. Averting her focus, she converges all her energy and _pulls_ with everything she has, using Snoke’s own closing barrier to ricochet the scrap towards them… and straight into Snoke’s spine.

His expression goes slack, mouth falling open in terrified revelation as his hold tremors, so near to breaking. All she needs is…

“Ben. Let’s finish it.”

Finally, a spark of life ignites in him and his gaze flits to her, the dream haze vanishing and replaced with austere resolve. She nods. He bounds forward, eyes set on a scythe near one of the dead praetorians, but Rey’s awareness suddenly flares, alerting her to movement. Finn and Rose exhale a mirrored breath, as if they mean to scream, then their trigger fingers squeeze.  

Plasma bolts of violet light hurtle towards Kylo and herself, and she throws out both of her hands, scrambling to focus a band between them. The counter works on one bolt, but the other escapes her before she can seal the barrier. However, it is knocked off course, though not enough to miss her entirely. It clips her throat, sending a fiery shock of agony up her jaw and she grabs at the injury, only to watch the first bolt hit a nest of wires above the control panels and set the whole ceiling ablaze.

“Rey!” Finn yells.

Fire rains down.

And Kylo does not hesitate, lunging forward and swinging the scythe wide. It cleaves the twisted old bastard who had once been her lover’s master clean in half. She watches as Snoke’s tongue waggles uselessly beyond his mouth and his frigid eyes roll back. His body collapses, a bloody mess of exposed innards and sordid gold on the floor, and she loses herself for a moment.

_It’s over._

_It’s finally over._

Kylo looks over at her, an apology evident on his lips and she walks through the raining fire, takes his face in her hands and kisses him. She kisses him so hard her teeth hurt and her nails dig crescents into his cheeks.

“It’s over.” she breathes into his mouth.

He tastes of blood and smoke and adrenaline, and she wants to savor every nuance of it, drinking in his savagery like an elixir. Originally, she’d thought giving up the opportunity to butcher her supposed _father_ would have left an unsatisfied taste in her mouth, but she’d been wrong. Watching Kylo end his life was a magnificent sight, one she will never forget. _And the taste of him._ She licks his lips, prompting a deeper kiss and he obliges, his muscles rippling as he tightens his hold on her. They separate seconds later, both breathing heavily.

“Your neck.” he murmurs.

She shakes her head, disregarding the twinge of pain. “It’s nothing.”

From down the hallway, footsteps hurry toward them, pounding like a team of horses. Rose runs to the blast hole of the room to peer cautiously down the corridor.

“It’s Poe!” she shouts, relief coloring from her voice.

“How?” Finn sputters.

“Does it matter?” she retorts sharply, more out of excitement than irritation.

Kylo’s hackles rise as armed Resistance soldiers flood the room. Poe steps into view seconds later, a rifle in one hand and a curious object in the other, some kind of fist-sized technical device Rey has never seen before. Finn and Rose both rush to him, wrapping their arms around him in fierce hug. Fire licks around the group, the shards of glass littering the floor glittering like diamonds.

“Where’s Kaydel?” Poe asks.

Finn looks gloomily over to her lifeless body.

Poe’s eyes follow and he exhales roughly. “Shit.”

“We’ve lost so many.” Rose whispers, tears shimmering down her face.

They share a moment of silence and Rey shares it with them, her own tears blurring in her vision and a ball of misery in her throat. When the moment is over, Finn and Rose step back, allowing Poe to address the only remaining non-humans in the room.

“You did it.” he says.

His statement is aimed at Rey, so she is surprised when Kylo steps forward. “Yes.” he answers.

Poe looks at the defeated corpse of Snoke before glancing back up at him. A mark of distinct familiarity passes over his face. “You know I had my doubts, but it seems I underestimated you.”

Kylo neglects his gruff praise and asks the more pressing question. “What of Hux?”

“He escaped. Got on a ship bound for who the fuck knows where.” Poe bites out bitterly.

Rey notes something peculiar, a change in his heartbeat that she nearly misses.

“Dammit! We can’t let him get away! We’ve gotta go after him!” Finn exclaims.

“Yeah.” Poe scowls at the floor.

“Finn and I can lead a team off planet.” Rose volunteers. “His ship coordinates have to be logged into the dome’s mainframe. No ship can leave earth without first listing their course.”

Poe shakes his head. “He could have given false coordinates.”

“But all ships have standard issue trackers embedded into their ship’s hard drive. Removing the tracker would destroy any chance of getting off the ground. Either way, we know where he’s going.”

“How exactly did Hux escape you?” Kylo interrupts their conversation, an edge in his tone.

Rey’s eyes are drawn to the device in Poe’s hand again and she decides to reach out, to see if she can lightly brush his thoughts, glean something from him to placate the unease that has expectedly knotted up her insides. But she finds nothing. Only a void where a lit candle wick should be. She can hear his life pulse, but she cannot see him in the ether?

Her frown deepens. _Why?_

 _I sense it too._ Kylo whispers.

Poe stares at him silently for a breath, then: “His damn AutoReiv. Bitch knew we were coming and fried all the doors, along with half my unit in an explosion.”

Kylo regards him shrewdly. “How did you escape Snoke’s soldiers?”

Poe’s jaw tightens. “A group of Resistance soldiers and rogue stormtroopers.”  

There it is again, that bizarre stutter in his heartbeat. _He’s lying._ She realizes. _His words may be true, but he’s holding something back. Something important._

“Are we done playing 20 Questions?” Poe queries, his face nothing but rigid lines.

“Obviously.” Rose interjects. “C’mon! Let’s stop wasting time!”

“You’re right.” Poe agrees.

Rey should have seen it coming, but after all the fighting and the death, to be quite frank, her mind is just tired, bone-tired.

The bolt hits her square in the chest before she grasps that Poe has lifted his rifle and Kylo vanishes from beside her. Her body falls even as she orders it to remain standing and the pain— _God the pain_. It spreads from her sternum like hellish thorns, enveloping her in a cocoon of agony and she opens her mouth in a soundless scream.

A pair of arms enclose around her and she recognizes the light perfume of Rose’s skin. The older girl looks down at her with dirty, tear-streaked cheeks and a mouth twisted in despair.

Shouts and rifle fire deflect off the walls around her as Poe’s unit turns on Kylo, but he moves through them effortlessly, cutting one down after the other until ending with Poe’s bloody neck in his clutches.

“Our general is down! I repeat our general is down! Kylo Ren attacked—”

Kylo hastily thrusts out his hand and snaps the remaining soldier’s neck with a flick of his wrist, then focuses his rage back on Poe.

“Why?!” he demands. “We had a deal!”

Poe grits his teeth, sadness tempering his features. “My mother. He would have killed her. I—I did—didn’t have a choice!”

“Hux.” Kylo murmurs.

“Yes.” Poe chokes out.

Kylo looks away sharply, his anger tainted with guilt. “You should have come to me.”

Rey battles to stay conscious.

“You were gone and we’d already hidden _her_ for you!” He spits accusingly, fighting against the severity of his wound.

_‘Her?’_

_Me. He’s talking about me._ Rey is stunned with yet another secret finally revealed to her. So this was how she’d remained hidden so long. _Poe._

He hacks up blood, his teeth stained with it. “Hux grabbed my mother when Snoke ordered a search for both of you.”

Kylo looks at him, a swallow working his throat. “I would have helped you.”

Poe smirks with great effort. “Yeah, I know.”

Long minutes pass with only the sound of Poe’s labored breaths and the growing crackle of fire. Finn stands struck dumb by the scene while Rose grips Rey closer, her sable hair brushing Rey’s forehead.

“You can do one thing for me.” Poe finally gasps.

Kylo looks at him, waiting.

“Kill that son-of-a-bitch for what he did to my family.”

“Is that all?”

Poe exhales another round of broken laughter. “You’re a real p—prick, you know that?”

Kylo does not reply, but he softens his hold, cradling the man as he takes his last breaths.

Then, he’s gone. Yet another wick snuffed out.

Rey’s vision dims as the flames surrounding them grow ever brighter, seeming to personify the scorching blaze in her chest. She releases a weak moan as it spreads down to her toes, her heart hammering so hard she’s sure it will burst.

Rose is the first to move, attempting to hoist Rey to her feet. “We need to get out of here!” she barks.

 

x

. x .

x

 

Images and voices swirl in her semi-conscious mind, bleeding together like muddy splashes of paint. Gaps of light and darkness, the soft glow of overhead guide lights lining a long, unending corridor. And they are descending. She can feel it in the rhythm of Kylo’s arms.

“What is this place?” he asks, his voice distant to her ears.

She can smell the deep wetness of the underground. Where are they? And why does her chest hurt so much?

_Oh yeah… I’ve been shot. By Poe. The same Poe who hid me away from Snoke all those years ago._

“It’s an old route I discovered in the classified blueprints of the city.” Finn answers, though the fog of her mind makes it impossible to know if he just spoke or if she’s delayed in processing his words.

The throb of agony blooms again in her chest through the deadened numbness and she groans, wanting to lean into Kylo as he presses a fleeting kiss to the side of her head, but having no strength to do so.

“It leads to an abandoned ship hangar. There should be old model ships there.” Rose elaborates.

 _Ships?_ She thinks of the Falcon and her fingers brush dazedly beneath Kylo’s ear, a memory of waking to him watching over her as she slept. It was a good memory.

 

x

. x .

x

 

“Get her on the ship. There’s a medical AutoReiv on board who will help her. The ol’ bucket of bolts might be outdated, but he’ll get the job done.” Finn’s voice wakes her.

She reaches through the darkness, looking for his face… and a calloused hand interlaces with hers. It is warm and trembling.

“I… I’m sorry.” she croaks weakly. Sorry for everything, for the loss, the betrayals, the chilly emptiness that comes after. _All of it._

The hand tightens around hers. “Me too.” He’s crying.

Rey looks hazily for Rose and finds her floating up from the gloom. She steps close and places a gentle touch on Rey’s shoulder. “Safe travels,” her head turns, possibly to look at Kylo, “the both of you.”

“What will you tell them?” Kylo asks.

“We’ll tell them you died in the fire, that we barricaded you in with the bodies and let you burn. No one but Rose and I will know the truth.” Finn answers.

 

x

. x .

x

 

_'Mother.’_

It’s the first thing she hears in ages.

_‘She’s waking.’_

Rey stirs, blinking groggily at the low ceiling and dim overhead light. Thrown over her body is a coarse blanket which she instantly finds itchy and tosses it to the side. Assessing her surroundings, she finds medical equipment crammed near her small bunk with the portal hole to her room left open, leading out to a shadowy tunnel.

The shadow moves bisecting into two silhouettes. She recognizes them at once and joy wells in her chest, coming out of her in a low croon. Her children slink into the room with ecstatic shrieks and cuddle up to her, each one fighting for petting hands. She leans into them, letting their low purrs fill her world with sound. _At least I still has the two_ , she thinks. _At least I haven’t lost everything._

Kaydel’s face pervades her mind and she squeezes her eyes shut, trying to will the last image of that beautiful face away, back to a time before… when they would steal chocolate bars and talk about strange rumors of a Resistance.

 _Those are the things I’ll remember,_ she promises herself. _The good things._

“You’re finally awake.”

Rey’s heart leaps in her chest at the sound of his bedroom tone.

Her children part, stepping back to allow him to her. He’s wearing a charcoal jumpsuit, one made for prolonged space travel. She glances down at herself, finding only a hospice gown.

“You’ve been in a coma for three standard months. The AutoReiv assured me that you’d never wake, but I knew you would.” He takes a seat on my cot as I make room for him.

I try to speak at first, but my throat rasps from disuse.

Kylo hands me a glass of water and at the touch of it on my lips I down it in two gulps, suddenly aware of how parched my mouth is. Clearing my throat, I ask. “Finn? Rose?”

“They are gathering what’s left of the Resistance and starting over. They freed the Hosnian dome and have opened other derelict domes, working to reconstruct them. They also sent word for me to tell you…”

Rey nudges him impatiently. “What?”

He looks away. “They’re naming their child Kaydel. They knew how much she meant to you.”

She sits in silence for an undetermined amount of time, simply processing the news. “I don’t know what to say.” her tone wavers.

“You don't have to say anything. At our core we’re still human. I know you loved her.” His hand cradles her cheek.

Rey kisses his palm, running her open mouth along his skin and letting him saturate her senses. “I think being what I am now makes the pain utterly unbearable. I feel… just…” she pulls her low lip between her teeth, “so much more.”

“But you don’t have to suffer it alone.”

A small smile teases the corners of her mouth. “Neither do you.”

He helps her, much to her chagrin—she is perfectly capable of walking on her own thank you very much, even if her equilibrium is a little off from being in a damn coma—to the ship’s cockpit. A bizarrely archaic looking AutoReiv greets her, his shiny exterior beaten and scarred in many places.

He bows to her in ceremonious fashion. “We meet at last, your grace. I am C3PO. I was certain the plasma bolt had taken you. No one has ever survived a direct hit like that, but your grace is strong.”

“Stronger than she knows.” Kylo mutters near her ear.

She pinches him, making sure to draw blood.

He does no more than grin impishly at her.

“Precisely Sir Ren. And our queen will be happy to know that we have also discovered General Hux’s whereabouts.”

Rey’s playful manner vanishes instantly. “Where?”

The AutoReiv seems not to mind her harsh tone. “At a hidden redoubt on the moon, Styx.”

She glances at Kylo whose black eyes fall on her with terrible promise. “I’ll let you have this one.”

Rey smiles coldly. “Yes, you will.”

From beyond the stars burn like lost lanterns on the sea, like frail wicks of struggling candle light trekking through that eternal dark abyss. And Rey is with them. She always has been.

And she always will be.

 

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**Notes for the Chapter:**

> #  **THANK YOU AGAIN & PLEASE DON'T FORGET TO LEAVE FEEDBACK!**
> 
> **> > > Also, if you have the the time and a twitter account, I'd love your feedback on [this poll](https://twitter.com/A_Hellraiser/status/1115684018408906752) for Hieros Gamos! < < < ******  
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